小谢尔顿-S05E07_小谢尔顿

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S07

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小谢尔顿-S07E01

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Engineering has a rich and storied history

工程学有着悠久又丰富的历史

dating back to ancient times

起源可追朔自上古时期

Some consider it the single most important field of study

有人觉得它是世上最重要的学科

Okay w wha no Stop

好了真停下吧

I'm sorry Howard I can't do this

抱歉霍华德我讲不下去了

You asked me to write you an introduction to engineering

是你自己请我帮你写一段工程学的介绍

Yes and if I wanted a comedy routine

如果我是想请人写搞笑风的

I'd have gone to Billy Crystal

我就去请喜剧片导演写了

Just let me read it

让我来念吧

Engineering has a rich and storied history

工程学有着悠久又丰富的历史

dating back to ancient times

起源可追朔自上古时期

Some consider it the single most important field of study

有人觉得它是人类在这世上

known to man

最重要的学科

from the wheel to the International Space Station

影响从轮胎到国际太空站

which I went to

对了本人曾去过

Honestly this again

不是吧又要提吗

Like we don't hear about your Nobel Prize all the time

你说得像你没整天把得诺贝尔奖挂嘴边

It's not my fault people ask about it

我又没办法控制别人不问我

Because you're always wearing it

因为你总是把奖章挂在胸口

You have it on right now

你现在就挂着

Look how shiny it is

你看它有多闪

Just tell your story

赶紧开始讲你的故事吧

My own history with engineering

我个人与工程学的接触历史

began spring semester of my freshman year

源自大一那年的春天

Good morning

大家早安

I'm Professor Boucher

我是布歇教授

and this is Civil Engineering Lab

这堂课是土木工程学

Class begins at 0900 which is

课程准时在0900开课也就是

now

此刻

In this course we're going to apply the principles

在这堂课中我们将会应用

of static mechanical forces

机械力的各种原理

I'm in this class

我也是这门课的学生

This class started at 0900

这门课在0900开课

so no you're not

所以你不在这门课了

As I was saying

我刚才说到

Uh yes

你问

I appreciate your use of the 24 four hour time format

我很欣赏您使用24小时制

Were you aware that while often referred to as "Military time "

那您知道这种我们俗称为"军用时间"的制度

it actually dates back to the Egyptians

最早可追溯回到古埃及人吗

I'm aware that the class is now starting at 0901

我只知道现在课得在0901开始了

Is it all right with you if I begin

你同意我现在开始讲课吗

Please

请

One minute in and I was already his favorite

开课第一分钟我就是他最爱的学生了

Nobody else is stronger than I am

世上没人比我强壮

Yesterday I moved a mountain

昨天我移了一座山

I bet I could be your hero

我相信我能当你的英雄

I am a mighty little man

我是个了不起的小家伙

I am a mighty little man

我是个了不起的小家伙

年

少

谢尔顿

This course is about practical applications

这门课在乎的是现实应用

This isn't about fancy theories or what works in a classroom

而非花哨的理论或是课堂里纸上谈兵

If a tunnel collapses the only math that's gonna matter

当隧道崩塌时唯一有用的数学

is the body count

就只有伤亡人数了

You Sheldon Cooper

-你说 -我叫谢尔顿·库珀

Son I'll learn your name if you make it to midterms

孩子等你撑到期中我再记你名字

Right now you're just a number to me

你现在在我眼里就只有编号

Ooh can I be number one

那我可以当1号吗

That's what Captain Picard calls Commander Riker

皮卡尔舰长在《星际旅行:下一代》中

on Star Trek Next Generation

都这么叫赖克中校

You need to listen more and talk less

你该做的是多听少说

Is that clear number one

听懂了吗 1号

Aye Captain

遵命舰长

Ballard's

巴拉德运动用品

Hello

你好

Hey what's up Oh nothing

-是你啊怎么啦 -没什么

I just called to say hello

我就是打来跟你问声好

Gee I don't think I've done that in my entire life

天啊我这辈子好像还没干过这档事

You want me to hang up

那你是要我赶紧挂电话吗

No Uh uh

不不用

W But what happens next

不不过接下来是要

Oh wait hang on

等等你稍等

I got another call

有别人打进来

All right fine yeah sure I can w

行当然没问题我可以等

Hello

您好

Hey Connie June

康妮是我啦琼

Hi June What's going on

你好啊琼怎么啦

I know you have a hair appointment this afternoon

我知道你今天下午跟我约了弄头发

but I'm gonna have to cancel

但我得跟你取消了

Everything okay

你有什么事吗

No I busted my knee up pretty good

没什么啦就是摔坏了膝盖

Oh Does Dale know

戴尔知道这件事吗

I I'm on the other line with him

我正好跟他在另一线讲电话

No not yet Yeah you can tell him

还没跟他说你想说可以说

Okay hang on

好你等我

Hello

喂

I'm so sorry who's this

抱歉您哪位啊

It's been so long

我等太久都忘了

I'm on the phone with June

另一线的人是琼

She hurt her knee

她膝盖受伤了

How

怎么伤的

Well hold on

你等我问问

How'd you hurt it

你是怎么弄伤的

Oh it's so embarrassing

说起来太丢人

I slipped on a glob of hair gel at the salon

我在美发店踩到一坨发胶滑倒

Wait a minute

你等我一下

She slipped on a glob of hair gel at the salon

她在美发店踩到一坨发胶滑倒

Oh nice

爽啊

Well that was worth the wait

刚才的等待都值得了

And then at exactly 9 00

在0900的时候呢

he locked the doors and wouldn't let any latecomers in

他把门锁上不让迟到的学生进来

That seems a little harsh

这有点太严苛了吧

He's so intolerant It's fantastic

他不宽待的态度真是太棒了

He also wears a bow tie and instead of using my name

他也别着领结而且不叫我名字

he gave me a number

而是给了我编号

I don't think I like that either

我好像也不喜欢这个

No it's great It's like we're robots

不这很棒我们就像机器人一样

And guess what my number is

猜猜我的编号是几号

Number two

2号[拉屎]吗

No number one

不是1号

like Riker on Star Trek

就像《星际旅行》里的赖克

But number two is also good Like the pencil

不过2号也不错啦像2B铅笔

Well I'm glad you enjoyed your class

好吧你上课开心我也开心

For our first assignment we get to build a bridge

我们第一个作业就是要建一座桥

Professor Boucher was part of the Army Corps of Engineers

布歇教授曾经是陆军工程兵团的人

and he built bridges all over the world

在世界各地都有建过桥

You know I was also in the Army

你知道我也曾经参过军吗

Ooh perhaps you trudged across one of his bridges

或许你曾经跋涉过他建的其中一座桥

How neat would that be

是不是想想就很酷

I bet Dad did cool Army stuff too

爸爸肯定也做过很酷的军人事务吧

Nope "Trudging" sums it up

没有 "跋涉"二字足以蔽之

See number one is also pretty funny

其实1号也蛮好笑的

'cause it means taking a leak

因为意思是小便

Come in

请进

If you're a robber I got a shotgun

如果你来抢劫我有霰弹枪

It's Connie and Dale Don't shoot

是康妮与戴尔别开枪

Hey Y'all didn't have to come by

你们不用这么麻烦来看我啦

We just wanted to see how you're doing

我们就是想来看看你情况如何

Yeah Brought your favorite ice cream

还给你买了你最爱的冰激凌口味

Butter pecan

奶油山核桃吗

What's your second favorite

你第二喜欢的口味呢

I'll put this away

我先拿去冰箱放

So how's it going

你怎么样了

Do you have anybody to help you out

有人帮忙照顾你吗

Oh yeah These little guys

有啊这些个好帮手

Elvis was onto something

埃尔维斯当年很有眼光啊

Till he keeled over on the toilet

直到他后来死在马桶上

最终在马桶上心脏病发而死

猫王当年曾滥用鸦片类麻药

He was the king

他可是猫王

That was his throne

那是他的王座

Seriously now though if you need anything at all

好啦不开玩笑了如果你有任何需要

we are here for you

我们会来帮你

That's right 100%

没错 100%

Would you stop

你别闹了

I was being sincere

人家是想表达心意

Well that's for the next dumb thing you say

那刚才那一下跟你下次说蠢话抵消

Well just quit hitting me would you

你能不能就别打我了

Well quit being stupid

那你能不能别说蠢话

For your design assignment you may decide

你们的设计作业你们可以选

between suspension bridges truss bridges beam bridges

设计悬索桥桁架桥梁式桥

just not Beau Bridges

只要不是"大乔与小乔"就行

And people say engineers don't have a sense of humor

谁说工程师没有幽默感了

Yes

你说

What are Beau Bridges

什么是大乔与小乔

That's all for today

今天课就到这里结束

Your initial designs are due next week

你们的首稿期限是下周

I finished my design assignment early

我提早完成了我的设计作业

I admire that initiative

我欣赏你的积极性

Thank you I stayed up late to finish it

谢谢我特别熬夜完成的

My normal bedtime is 2100 hours

我平常都是在2100点睡觉

but I was so excited to do it that I took a power nap

但我很期待做这个作业在回家的路上

in my Meemaw's back seat on the drive home

我在我姥姥的车后座先小睡恢复精神

Uh you'll need to do this again It's wrong

你得重做这是错的

No it's not

不没错

Son I'm giving you another chance before it's due

孩子我这是在截止前再给你次机会

Well what's wrong with it

那它哪错了

That's your job to figure out

弄清楚错在哪是你的任务

I would argue that it's your job to teach me

我会用你的工作是教导我来反驳

Let's see

我看看

To start this bridge is in pieces

首先这座桥是断的

What do you mean

什么意思

Well two can play at this game

撕纸谁不会啊

Well now they can't

现在没得玩了

And then he ripped up my paper right in front of me

然后他当着我的面把我的论文撕了

What is this man's problem

他有什么毛病啊

I don't know He didn't even use a ruler

我不知道他甚至都没用尺子

He just ripped it up willy nilly

就那么撕得参差不齐

Do you want me to call the school

你想我给学校打电话吗

No he was in the Army

不了他参过军

I want him to think I'm tough

我想让他觉得我是个硬汉

Sure

可不吗

Well I'm sorry you had a bad day

你今天过得不好我很遗憾

How about a little trip to RadioShack

我们去睿侠电器行逛逛怎么样

RadioShack's not gonna make this better

去睿侠电器行也不会改善什么

It's also not gonna make it worse so okay

也不会让情况变得更糟所以去吧

You got it

没问题

Maybe he was just intimidated by my intelligence

也许他是对我的聪明才智感到威胁

Or maybe he's an insecure bully

也许他只是一个没安全感的恶霸

taking out his frustrations on a little boy

把情绪发泄在一个小男孩身上

I like my version better where I'm intimidating

我喜欢我的说法这样我有威慑力

and not a helpless child

而不是无助的小孩

Okay he's taking out his frustrations on a powerful

好吧他把他的情绪发泄在一个强大

and intimidating young man

有震慑力的年轻人身上

That works

这么说可以

Romeo

罗密欧

wherefore art thou Romeo

为何偏偏是你罗密欧

Hey baby

宝贝

Ballard's

巴拉德运动用品

It's me Any chance you could swing by

是我你能来一趟吗

What do you need

你怎么了

Well the recliner won't go down

躺椅放不下来了

and I'm stuck in this chair like a damn fool

我像个傻子一样被卡在椅子里了

Well that is a situation

确实情况不妙

How long you been stuck

你被卡住多久了

Are you gonna help me out or not

你到底要不要帮忙

Oh just give me a moment to enjoy it

总得让我笑一会吧

Get your ass over here and you can laugh at me in person

你可以滚过来当面嘲笑我

Eh I'm on my way

我这就来

Thank you

谢谢

Got to grab my camera

得带上我的相机

You know it's bleak when even a trip to RadioShack

当去睿侠电器行都不能让我开心时

couldn't lift my spirits

我就真的是心如死灰了

Professor Proton will be right back after these messages

广告过后继续播出《质子教授》

Of course

对啊

I realized Professor Boucher

我意识到布歇教授

was pushing me to be the best me I could be

是在鞭策我让我成为最好的自己

You'd think the person who could teach me

原以为只有我能教自己

to be the best me I could be was me

成为最好的自己

but it was Professor Boucher after the Army taught him

但这个人其实是在军队里学会

to be the best he that he could be

做最好的自己的布歇教授

Now it was up to me

现在能不能让我们

to help us be the best "We" we could be

成为最好的"我们" 就看我了

I think you're going to like this one sir

我觉得这回你该满意了

Do it again

重做

Yes sir sir

是长官

Here you go

给你

Just another piece of paper Glen Campbell

Again

重做

Yes sir sir

是长官

Oh at least use a straight edge

至少用尺子撕吧

You wanted to see me ma'am

你找我吗女士

Hello Professor Boucher Please come in have a seat

你好布歇教授请进坐吧

I'd prefer to stand

我站着就好

Oh All right uh then I will also stand

好吧那我也站着

You know what um these are really not standing shoes

这双鞋不适合站着

so I'm just gonna sit

所以我还是坐着吧

I was hoping that we could have a little chat about Sheldon Cooper

我希望能和你谈一谈谢尔顿·库珀的事

I'll start

我先说吧

Sheldon is a very important asset to this university

谢尔顿对这所大学来说是很宝贵的人才

And we like to keep that little fella happy

我们想让那个小家伙在本校一直开心

But it seems that your teaching methods

但似乎你的教学方法

are making him unhappy

让他不开心了

You understand

你懂我意思了吗

Yes ma'am I do

是的女士我懂

Great

很好

You'd like me to turn his frown upside down

你是想我将他的哭脸转笑脸

You know when you say it

这话从你嘴里说出来

it sounds more chilling than fun

比起好笑更让人不寒而栗

I'm just saying

我只是说

that he's a sensitive kid and you are

他是个敏感的小孩而你

well whatever this vibe is

你那种不知道怎么描述的气场

I understand

我明白

Excellent so you'll take it easy on him

很好所以你会对他宽容点吗

No I'm sorry ma'am I can't do that

不抱歉女士我不能

You see uh

你知道

all these "Ma'ams " They sound polite

你一口一个"女士" 听着礼貌

but then I don't seem to be getting anywhere

但我的话你好像左耳进右耳出

Well that's because you're not

因为确实没用

You do realize that I'm your boss

你知道我是你的顶头上司吗

Yes ma'am I do

是的女士我知道

And do you realize that I have tenure

那你知道我有终身职位吗

Ugh tenure

终身职位

What fun is it being president

要是不能拿工作威胁人

if I can't threaten people's jobs

当校长还有什么意思

May I get back to class now

现在我能回去上课了吗

Oh fine And fall off or whatever it is

好吧切散吧

It's "dismissed " Ma'am

应该是"解散" 女士

Just go

快走吧

I heard that giggle

我听见你笑了

Okay Soup's on

好了晚饭好了

Mmm Wow looks good

看起来不错啊

Oh geez

天啊

Are you okay

你怎么了

Oh I uh I tweaked my back

我把背扭伤了

Oh How

怎么弄的

I was helping June out

我去帮琼的忙

Well aren't you sweet

你人真好

What'd she have you doing for her

她找你帮什么忙

Yeah this and that

就是帮点小忙

This and that what

什么小忙

Yeah This and that and the other thing

就是帮点小忙跟一点琐碎的

Do you not want to tell me

你不想告诉我吗

Well for the sake of honesty and because she might tell you

为了诚实起见也是因为她可能告诉你

I was helping her take a shower

我帮她洗澡了

You took a shower with her

你和她洗澡了吗

She took the shower I was just assisting

是她洗澡我只是帮她

So she was naked

所以她一丝不挂

For crying out loud we were married

老天爷啊我们结过婚

I've seen her naked a million times

我看过她一丝不挂无数次了

You think that is helping

您觉得你说这话有帮助吗

I knew I shouldn't have been honest

我就知道我不该说实话的

You shouldn't have been playing bathroom attendant

你是不该扮她的浴室服务员

There was nothing sexy about it

完全没有任何能起邪念的那种

It was like washing a car

就像洗车一样

A rusty old car

一辆生锈的旧汽车

Did you scrub her windshield

那你擦她的挡风玻璃了吗

What does that even mean

什么意思

Her boobs genius

就是她的胸部天才

I was helping her in the shower

我只是协助她洗澡

so she didn't fall down

以免她在浴室里滑倒

Well fine

好吧

And boobs are headlights

而且众所周知

Everybody knows that

胸部应该是车头灯

What are you doing

你在干嘛

Watching Sheldon struggle with homework

看谢尔顿写作业碰到困难

It's so great

太精彩了

Come on think

拜托思考

What's going on I can't figure out this engineering project

-怎么了 -我想不明白这个工程学作业

And every time I turn it in my professor just rips it up

每次我上交教授都会把它撕掉

Well ain't this the fella you liked

你之前不是喜欢这个人吗

I did when I thought he was pushing me to be all I could be

是啊我本以为他想鞭策我成为最好

but it turns out all he can be is mean

但原来他只是纯恶毒

I'm sure you'll figure it out

我相信你会想出来的

Could you talk to him

你能跟他谈谈吗

You're in college now

你已经是大学生了

Don't you think you should fight your own battles

你不觉得你该独自面对吗

Does telling on him to the president of the university count

那在校长面前打他小报告算吗

Did it work

奏效了吗

No Then no

-没有 -那就不算

Will you please talk to him

拜托你跟他谈谈行吗

Ooh what if your mom does it

不如让你妈去找他好不好

But you were both in the Army

但你们都当过兵

And you're both crabby and impatient

又一样易怒没耐心

There's a lot of common ground

你们共同点非常多

You really got under this guy's skin huh

你真的气到他了对吧

It would seem so

看样子是的

Lot of common ground

我跟他确实有很多共同点

Hello

你好

Hey June

琼

Connie Just wanted to see if you need anything

我是康妮就想问问你是否需要什么

Nah I'm good but thank you though

不需要啦不过谢谢你的关心

You sure

你确定

Groceries Dishes

买生活用品啊做饭洗碗啊

Help in the shower

帮你洗澡呢

Damn it Dale

靠戴尔个大嘴巴

I'm sorry

抱歉

I'm just not comfortable with it

我心里就是觉得不舒服

You think I am

你以为我喜欢

Last time he saw me naked gravity was on my side

他上一次看到我胴体时我还没受地心引力摧残

Then why'd you ask him to do it

那你为毛还叫他帮你洗

Who else am I gonna ask Connie

不然我还能叫谁康妮

You got tons of friends

你朋友多的是

I've got acquaintances I've got clients

我是有熟人有客人

Those aren't exactly people

但你可不希望

you want looking at your hernia scar

被这些人看到自己的疝气疤痕

And Dale is

戴尔就可以吗

I got that hernia by dragging him onto the bed

我得疝气就是因为有一晚他喝醉回家就倒地昏睡

one night he came in passed out drunk

我把他拖上床引发的

Look I'm sorry if I crossed the line

听着如果我过界了我向你道歉

but you have nothing to worry about

但你没什么可担心的

Okay

好吧

Look I promise next time

听着我保证下次洗澡

I'll get the kid who mows my lawn

我会叫帮我除草的那小子过来

to come over and hose me off in the backyard

在后院直接用水管冲我

Call me

打给我吧

I'd be happy to hose you off in the backyard

我很乐意在后院用水管冲你

I got to admit I'm a little jealous

我承认我有点妒忌

Of what

妒忌什么

You

你

Why

为什么

You have the Dale I never got

在你身边的戴尔是我没能拥有的

I spent a lot of time polishing that turd

我花了很长时间打磨他这块顽石

and you get all the benefits

结果好处都被你占了

Hey I put my time in on that too

我也花了时间和心血调教他的好吗

Not as much as me

没我投入的多

When I met him he was a mess

我刚认识他那会他简直惨不忍睹

You should've seen where I started

你该看看我初识的他是什么鬼样子

Well I think we can both agree

我们应该都赞同

he is one lucky turd

他就是坨走狗屎运的臭狗屎

Amen sister

太对了姐们

So let me guess

我猜猜

You think I'm being too hard on him

你认为我对他太严厉了

and you want me to lighten up

你希望我放松些

He is having a tough time

他最近很难熬

It's a tough class

这堂课本来就很难

Look I get it

听着我懂

I was in the Army too

我也当过兵

I I'm all for being strict but

我完全赞成对孩子严格要求但是

You know maybe you could just

也许你可以

point him in the right direction

给他指明正确的方向

You mean give him the answer

你是指直接告诉他答案

No no

不是啦

Would you

你愿意这么做吗

What do you think

你说呢

No See

-不愿意 -看见没

I didn't give you the answer and you figured it out

我没告诉你答案你靠自己想明白了

Look

你听我说

your son is obviously brilliant

你儿子显然聪明绝顶

but coddling him won't prepare him for the real world

但一昧娇惯他他日后就无法适应真实世界

I've been saying that since the day he was born

从他出生那天起我就一直这么说

Sometimes you have to break them down to build them back up

有时想要重塑一个人就得先把他彻底击垮

I do that with my football players

我对付我的橄榄球员就是用这招

At least I try to but then the parents

至少理想很丰满但骨感现实就是

get all bent out of shape they come into my office

家长全都大发雷霆冲来我办公室

You don't say

不会吧[别说了]

Yeah you would not believe

真的说出来你都不信

Oh Y You mean me Got it

哦你是叫我闭嘴知道了

You figured it out again

你又自己想明白了答案

Hey I'm two for two

两发两中呢

Did you talk to my teacher

你找我老师谈过了吗

I did

找了

So is he gonna tell me what I'm doing wrong

他会告诉我我哪里做错了吗

I'm going to

我来告诉你

You're sitting here waiting to be handed the answer

你坐在家里等别人把答案交到你手上

and that's not how life is

但人生不是这样的

You got to work for it

你必须付出努力

I don't want to hear a football pep talk

我不想听橄榄球打气话

This isn't football This is real

这不是橄榄球而是真实人生

Your professor's right

你的教授说得对

Now instead of pouting

别噘嘴了

take charge of your own life

你该对自己的人生奋斗

My dad was right

我爸说得没错

I had to take charge

我必须继续奋斗

And after 20 more minutes of pouting

继续噘嘴20分钟后

that's exactly what I did

我就是这么做的

But despite my best efforts

但尽管我已经尽力了

I was still no closer to figuring it out

我解题仍然毫无进展

I was going to have to see my work

我要再一次看着我的研究

be torn to pieces one more time

被撕成碎片

Of course

当然了

I'd been so focused on mathematical perfection

我之前一心只想着完善数学因素

that I hadn't taken into account real world elements

完全没考虑过现实世界的要素

Wind can trigger vibrations

风能引发振动

If these vibrations occur at a system's resonant frequency

如果这些振动发生在一个系统的共振频率

then oscillation generates excitation

那振荡会形成刺激

and a bridge can lose its structural integrity

桥便有可能失去结构完整性

Okay I'm a genius again

我又是天才少年啦

I couldn't wait to hand in my paper

我等不及递交论文

and see the proud look on Professor Boucher's

看布歇教授脸上露出骄傲的表情

不

I figured it out

我想明白了

It's wind It's wind

是风是风

I hate engineering

我痛恨工程学

Wait so after all this time

等等所以这些年来

that's your problem with engineering

你不爽工程学原来是因为这个吗

Evidently

显而易见

So all the teasing

所以你总是嘲笑

and all the abuse had nothing to do with me

和辱骂原来都与我无关吗

I'll admit at first I had a chip on my shoulder

我承认一开始我是因为不爽那门课

because of that class but then it was mostly you

但之后主要是因为瞧不起你

Unbelievable When will I learn

服了我几时才能学会不自取其辱

I could give you that answer

我可以告诉你答案

but if you figure it out for yourself

但如果你自己想出来

it'll mean so much more

会更有意义

Goodbye Sheldon Bye

-再见再也不见谢尔顿 -拜

You wanted to see me ma'am

您想见我是吗

Professor

教授

I understand you locked Sheldon out of class

我听说你把谢尔顿关在了教室门外

Well he was late That's my policy

他迟到了那是我的规矩

I need you to do me a favor

我要你帮我个忙

Yes

您说

Tell me exactly what his face looked like

给我详细描述事发时

when it happened

他脸上的吃瘪表情

Wh Seriously

你认真的

Oh Paint me a picture

像画画一样不漏一丝细节

I want to feel like I was the one who closed that door

我想感同身受一下甩他门有多爽

Oh I'm gonna sit for this

那我要坐下慢慢说

Okay so he approached the door with that smug look he has

他走到教室门前一副嚣张样

Ugh I know it well Then when he realized it was locked

-我可太熟悉了 -接着当他发现门锁了时

his face fell into shock and disbelief

他的表情转为震惊和难以置信

Nice

妙啊

Uh show me Do the face

演给我看学他的表情

Oh sir

先生

you have turned my frown upside down

你真是让我哭脸转笑脸啊

You are welcome ma'am

不客气校长

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