小谢尔顿-S03E08_小谢尔顿

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Previously on Young Sheldon...

《少年谢尔顿》前情提要

I saw Connie for the first time since I broke up with her

我和康妮分手后第一次见到她

and it's making me wonder if she also is feeling lonely

所以我不禁思考她是否也感到孤独寂寞

and I made a bad decision for both of us.

我为我们所做的决定是否错了呢

I hate to be the one to tell you this John

我也不想当告诉你坏消息的人约翰

but she's kind of been seeing someone new.

她现在有新的约会对象了

She seems to be doing okay.

她好像过得挺好

Oh I hope he gets lost at sea and never returns

我也希望他迷失在大海上永远回不来

I'm having a lot of feelings.

我现在心情非常复杂

Hey. Connie.

你好啊康妮

I thought I'd just uh... say "Hi."

所以我就过来... 来打个招呼

Would it be awkward if I asked her to join us

我要是邀请她一起看会不会尴尬呢

Oh couldn't be any more awkward.

再尴尬也尴尬不过现在

In many ways

从很多方面来看

a high school is like an academic house of horrors.

高中就是一个学术的恐怖屋

There's the cafeteria

比如食堂

which when even freshly cleaned

哪怕是刚打扫过

maintains a subtle aroma of tater tots and throw up.

空气中都还隐隐飘着薯球跟呕吐的气味

The schoolyard where one is exposed

还有学校操场你得暴露在

to bullying by delinquents and attacks from above

校园恶霸的面前还得小心

by eye pecking demons.

来自空中戳眼恶魔的攻击

But all of these pale in comparison

但这些都比不上

to the most horrific location of all.

学校中最令人发指的场所

A place teeming with the sweat and secretions

这里布满着汗水与上百个

from hundreds of unwashed bodies.

没清洗过的肉体身上的分泌物

The swimming pool.

校园泳池

Sorry Sheldon. Water safety is a required

抱歉谢尔顿水上安全课

part of your P.E. Class.

是你的体育课中必修的项目

But other kids use that pool.

但其他孩子也用那个游泳池

It's basically a big bowl of teenager soup.

那基本就是一大锅青少年汤

It's out of my hands. It's a state requirement.

我也没办法啊这是州立规定

If you don't like it take it up with your congressman.

如果你有意见那你去跟区议员谈啊

I did.

我试过了

He won't return my calls.

他都不回我电话

Then I guess you're swimming tomorrow.

那明天你是非游不可了

Except for the laughter the glowing eyes

除了没有这笑声发光的双眼

and the lightning that's exactly how it happened.

以及闪电其他的都是真的

I'm a little nervous.

我有点紧张

You're the first ex girlfriend I've ever been friends with.

你是我第一个维持朋友关系的前任

And you're also my first ex girlfriend.

也是我第一个前女友

And that's because you...

那是因为你...

How about you just think of me as your friend

你可不可以就把我当成是你的朋友

Okay. Yes that's good.

可以没问题这样很好

So I understand you're seeing someone new.

对了我听说你有新的交往对象啦

Tell me everything.

快跟我八卦一下

不要

I assumed that uh as friends

不是说好了我们是朋友吗

we could tell each other about our personal lives.

朋友间可以互相分享私人生活啊

Trust me John you you don't want to hear about these things.

约翰你相信我你不会想听这些细节的

Actually I do.

我真心想听

Your happiness is very important to me.

我很在乎你幸不幸福

Oh what the hell.

行吧随你便

His name is Dale.

他的名字叫戴尔

He owns a sporting goods store.

他开了一家体育用品店

And we've only been out a few times

我们只约出去过几次

but so far so good.

但目前来说处得还挺开心

Well that sounds wonderful.

那很好啊

Good for you.

恭喜你

Thank you.

谢谢

Now would you like to hear about the women I'm dating

那现在你有兴趣听我说我在交往的女人吗

You're dating other women

你跟新的女人交往了吗

Heavens no.

才没有呢

Come on Jesus. This is for your birthday. Help me out.

帮个忙啊耶稣你的生日你帮个手嘛

Boy Sheldon is really worked up about this whole swimming thing.

妈呀谢尔顿对游泳这事反应可真大

Don't you think he should learn for his own safety

你不觉得他该为自己的安全而学吗

You really think he's ever gonna go near a body of water

你真的觉得他这辈子会想去接近水域吗

Yeah. It's only a matter of time

不是不去时候未到

before someone throws him in one.

迟早会碰到有人把他扔下水

Well break it to him gently.

你温柔点跟他说这消息吧

Wait Me

等等我去说吗

Swimming's a sport and you're a sports person.

游泳是种运动你是搞运动的

And he's a mama's boy and you're his mama.

他是个小妈宝而你是他妈妈

How about we do it together

那我们一起去怎么样

Fine but you can't hang me out to dry.

行但你不能到时候坑我背锅

Of course not.

当然不会

We're a team. We're in this together right

我们是个团队同生共死对吧

You bet.

那当然

She's gonna hang me out to dry.

他绝对会推我去死

巴拉德体育用品店

Observation is an important part of the scientific method.

观察是做科学很重要的一部分

Darwin observed the finches

达尔文观察了雀类

Jane Goodall observed the chimpanzees

珍·古德观察了黑猩猩

and for some reason

而不知为何

Dr. Sturgis wanted to observe my meemaw's new suitor.

斯特吉斯博士想观察姥姥的新对象

Excuse me just for one second.

麻烦稍等我一下

Howdy. Can I help you

你好有什么需要吗

No no just browsing.

没什么我就是随便看看

Yeah well any particular sport you might need that for

你是玩哪种运动想要用到那个呢

Depends. What the heck is it

看情况了这是什么鬼

It's a cup.

是个护裆[杯子]

A cup

杯子吗

What kind of a cup has holes in it

什么杯子会有这么多漏洞啊

Well it protects your private parts.

这是拿来保护你私密部位的啦

Well I can see how that might be useful.

那我看出它有用的地方了

Well this has been very informative.

感谢你十分有料的讲解

Thank you.

谢谢你

You're welcome.

不客气

You just uh...

如果...

If you have any more questions you let me know.

如果还有别的问题你就来问我

I certainly will.

一定会

All right.

好的

Georgie I want you to keep an eye on that weirdo over there.

小乔治你帮我注意一下那边那个怪人

I know that weirdo. He used to date my meemaw.

我认识那个怪人他是我姥姥前男友

That guy

那家伙吗

Yeah he's like super smart.

是啊他超级聪明

I'm not sure I believe you.

我有点不敢信你的话

Hey Dr. Sturgis.

斯特吉斯博士

Hello

你好啊

Wait. Uh oh.

不对惨了

Hello.

您好

I may have made a questionable

我貌似做了一些

uh decision regarding our friendship.

对我们友谊不太好的决定

What have you done John

你又干嘛了约翰

I went to the sporting goods store

我去了体育用品店

to check out your new fella.

看看你的新对象

Did you speak to him

你跟他说话了吗

Oh yes. In fact he sold me an athletic supporter

有啊而且他还成功跟我推销了

to protect my genitals.

保护我私处的运动器材

Good.

很好

You may want to be wearing that next time I see you.

下次让我见到你之前你最好戴上它

Okay.

好的

Shelly can you turn the TV off for a second

谢利你能先关掉电视一下吗

But after this commercial break

但广告结束之后

Professor Proton is going to use a candle

质子教授要用一根蜡烛

to suck a hard boiled egg into a milk bottle.

把一个水煮蛋给吸进牛奶瓶里呢

We'll make it quick.

我们尽快说完

Go ahead.

说吧

Your father has something to tell you.

你爸爸有事情想跟你说

Your mother wants you to swim. ‭George

-你妈妈要你去游泳 -乔治

Mom

妈

Who's ready to suck eggs

都准备好来吸蛋了吗

That was the lamest tantrum I've ever seen.

这真是我看过最弱鸡的发火了

I'm being forced to swim tomorrow in P.E.

我被强迫明天体育课上游泳

Poor baby. You have to play in a pool

好可怜哦你只能去泳池里玩

instead of sit in a classroom.

不能坐在教室里

A pool of sweat germs and dead skin cells.

一池子的汗水细菌以及死皮细胞

Still better than learning.

还是比上课好啊

Maybe it's time for me to run away from home

或许是时候我该逃家

and join a traveling math club.

去加入旅行数学俱乐部了

Just pretend to be sick.

你就装病就行啦

But that would be lying. I'm not a liar.

但那是在说谎我不是骗子

Well you better be a swimmer.

那你最好是个游泳健将

Or a drowner.

或是溺死鬼

Why don't you like me

你为什么不喜欢我

You're full of bacteria.

你满是细菌

So are you but you don't hear me saying "Ugh." It's rude.

你身上也有但我就不会鄙视你因为很没礼貌

Look I may just be pool water

虽然我只是泳池水

but I still have feelings.

但我也有感情啊

Sorry water.

对不起泳池水

Come on.

来嘛

My PH level is 7.4

我的酸碱度是7.4

and with three parts per million of chlorine

并含有百万分之3的氯

I'm cleaner than your daddy's plate after Thanksgiving dinner.

我比你爸爸感恩节晚餐后的盘子还干净

Wow. That's pretty clean.

那是真的很干净了

Look how clear I am Sheldon.

你看我有多清澈谢尔顿

You can see all the way to the bottom.

你能一眼望到池底

Closer.

再近一点

A little closer.

再近一点

A little closer.

再近一点

Gotcha

抓到你啦

Pool monster

泳池水怪

I don't feel well.

我不太舒服

What's wrong baby

怎么啦小宝贝

I don't know. I just feel awful.

不知道就感觉很不舒服

Well there is something going around.

最近的确好像有什么病在传染

Billy Sparks got some kind of bug.

比利·斯巴克斯好像就染上了什么虫

That is consistent with what I said. Good.

这跟我的说法十分符合很好

You're staying home today.

那你今天在家休养

I'll go make you some tea.

我去给你泡杯茶

Welcome to the dark side.

欢迎加入邪恶阵营

Mom says you're sick.

妈妈说你生病了

He's faking.

他在装病

Really

真的假的

Why You love school.

为什么你不是很喜欢上学吗

Swim test.

游泳测验

Oh sure. You would die.

懂了你绝对会死

If you're gonna do this let me give you some pointers.

如果你要装病那我来指点你几招

You've done this before

你这么做过吗

Tell him.

告诉他

Oh he's the master.

他可是大师

He coached me through my last two...

他可是我前两次...

sore throats.

喉咙痛的幕后执导

I slept on the couch during those.

那两次我都去沙发上睡觉了呢

I know.

我知道啊

First of all

首先呢

you got to cough even when Mom's not in the room.

妈妈不在你房间时你也得咳嗽

Got it.

懂了

And don't put the thermometer in the tea.

别把温度计放到茶里来提升温度

114 fever is a giveaway.

烧到45℃太假了

Smart. Told you.

-聪明 -我就说吧

Oh don't be afraid to let her look in your throat.

她要看你的喉咙就放胆让她看

She's checking to see if it's red

她是想看看有没有发炎红肿

but it's always red.

但本来就一直是红色的啊

You are good.

你真的很厉害

Here try spitting up a little phlegm.

来试着吐点痰出来

We got work to do.

功夫还不够啊

I'm sure he'll feel better tomorrow.

我相信他明天就会好多了

And you can send any homework that he needs to do

他今天需要做的作业就给他哥哥

with his brother.

让他带回来就行了

Thank you.

谢谢你

Doesn't this all seem a little convenient

你不觉得这一切太巧合了吗

You think he's faking it

你觉得他是在装病吗

Today's the swim test.

今天有游泳考试

It's pretty suspicious.

真的很可疑啊

Sheldon just coughed up something gross in a tissue.

谢尔顿刚往纸巾里咳出了一些很恶心的东西

See

看见没

And that's why he's staying home.

所以他必须待在家里休息

Mary come on.

玛丽别天真了

No I am not changing my mind.

不我不会改变主意的

My little boy is not a liar.

我的小宝贝可不是撒谎精

Connie Tucker

康妮·塔克吗

Yeah. ‭Here you go.

-是的 -这是给您的

Well thank you. ‭You're welcome.

-谢谢你 -不客气

"I overstepped The bounds of friendship."

"我的行为超越了友谊的底线

Sorry. John."

对不起约翰"

Hello

喂

So why in the hell would your ex boyfriend

你的前男友为什么

send me a giant cookie

要寄一块巨型曲奇给我

抱歉我监视了你约翰

My little boy is not a liar.

我的小宝贝可不是撒谎精

My little boy is not a liar.

我的小宝贝可不是撒谎精

You don't have a temperature.

你没发烧啊

That's good. You want to get comfy on the couch

这是好事你想舒舒服服躺在沙发上

and watch your Star Trek tapes

看你的《星际旅行》录像带吗

No thank you.

不用了谢谢

I know what'll make you feel better.

我知道做什么能让你好受点

Soft kitty warm kitty

软猫猫暖猫猫

Little ball of fur

小毛球猫猫

Happy kitty

笑猫猫

Sleepy kitty

困猫猫

Purr purr purr

呼噜呼噜呼噜

Soft liar warm liar

软骗子暖骗子

Little ball of fib

小毛球撒谎精

Happy liar sleepy liar

笑骗子困骗子

Fib fib fib.

超级无敌撒谎精

Feel better

好点了吗

Uh uh.

并没有

Really

不是吧

Cooper's out sick

库珀请病假了

What a baby.

真是娇嫩的小婴儿

Really Cooper's out sick

真的吗库珀请病假了

Oh baby

太爽啦

Hallelujah

赞美上帝

Happy birthday to me.

真是过节了

Shelly I'm gonna run to the grocery store real quick

谢利我去杂货店一趟

so I can make you some soup.

买些煲汤的食材

Okay.

好

I had lied to my mother and gotten away with it.

我欺骗了我妈妈还逍遥法外

The guilt was more than I could take.

内疚快把我吞噬了

I had to make this right.

我必须改正错误

I could confess and break my mother's heart

我可以老实坦白让我妈伤心难过

or I could turn my lie into the truth

也可以把我的谎言变成事实

and actually get myself sick.

真的把自己搞病

Hi Sheldon.

谢尔顿你好啊

Hello Billy. I hear you're not feeling well.

你好比利我听说你不舒服

I'm not. I have a cold.

确实不舒服我感冒了

That's too bad.

真不幸

Put her there.

伸出手来吧

Why

为什么

Just shake my hand Billy.

跟我握手就是了比利

But my mom says that's how germs get spread.

但我妈妈说这样会传播细菌

I know. ‭ You do

-我知道 -真的吗

When did you talk to my mom

你几时和我妈聊过天了

Just eh...

赶紧...

Wait want to play

等等你想一起玩吗

Is that for your patient

是煮给你的小病人吃的吗

Yes.

是的

He's still under the weather.

他还是不舒服

Oh that's too bad.

太惨咯

Running a fever

他有没有发烧

No.

没有

Sniffly nose

有没有流鼻水

No.

也没有

But he couldn't even bring himself to watch his Star Trek show.

但他连看《星际旅行》都没精神

Oh dear. I better go call an ambulance.

那么严重呀那我该叫救护车了

You're not funny.

你这样并不好笑

And he ain't sick.

他根本没病

Cheers. ‭Cheers.

-干杯 -干杯

Now don't fill up on those.

别急着点吃的

We still got two giant cookies to finish.

我们还有两块巨型曲奇没吃完呢

I'm sorry about all that stuff with John.

很抱歉约翰做出那些事

I... He means well but sometimes

他是好意但有时

he can just be uh... A little quirky.

他这人就是有点...古怪

Yeah I kind of figured that

我看出来了

yeah I watched him play ping pong with his own crotch.

我看到他和自己裆部对打乒乓球

I don't know what that is but I'm sure he did it.

我不知道那是怎么一回事但我不意外

Well I mean how'd you meet this guy

你到底是怎么遇见这人的

What did you try to steal his pot of gold

难不成你试图在彩虹尽头

at the end of the rainbow

偷走他的金罐吗

爱尔兰小矮妖的传说

Okay okay he's a very sweet man.

别揶揄了他是个很好的人

Well I bet he is.

我相信他是

If you must know

如果你非要知道

he's Sheldon's college professor.

他是谢尔顿的大学教授

Smart short and weird

聪明个儿矮还古怪

well that's the whole package right there. ‭

他可真是完美的对象

Hey okay that's enough.

别再说了够了

Well I got to ask.

我一定要问

Do you feel like you're dating

你现在是不是觉得自己

a supermodel right now

在跟酷帅超模约会

You didn't touch your soup baby.

汤你一口都没喝过呢宝贝

I'm not hungry.

我不饿

You aren't feelin' any better

你没有好一些吗

Well it'll be in the fridge

我先放到冰箱里

if you change your mind.

你迟点想喝就告诉我

Young man.

年轻人

Yes you.

没错就是你

Pretending to be sick.

居然装病

You should be ashamed of yourself

你应该感到羞耻

But I was afraid to go in the pool.

但我害怕进泳池

You are in a pool.

你现在就深陷池子里

A pool of your own deceit.

你自己的谎言之池

If my mother were alive

如果我母亲还活着

I'd never lie to her.

我绝不会欺骗她

And I'd always eat her soup.

我也会把她辛苦煮的汤喝光光

My grandson's trying to steal home

我孙子想偷回本垒

and he trips and he falls and lands face first on the plate

他不小心被绊倒了一头摔到本垒板上

lost a tooth we won the game.

掉了颗牙我们赢得了那场比赛

Get this.

精彩的来了

He finds the tooth two days later...

他两天后找到了那颗牙

when he goes to the bathroom.

就在他上大号时

That's it

就这反应

You don't understand.

你没听懂

He found the tooth...

他找到了牙齿...

I got it.

我听懂了

What's going on You okay

怎么了你还好吗

Actually no.

其实我不好

I don't like the way you've been talkin' about John.

我不喜欢你谈论约翰的语气

I was kidding around.

我只是开玩笑啦

Well it bothered me.

但是让我很不舒服

Wait a minute hold it hold hold hold.

等一下打住打住

Your weirdo ex comes sneaking around checking me out

你的怪咖前男友偷偷摸摸地来监视我

and all of a sudden I'm the bad guy here

怎么突然之间我却成了坏人

You don't get to call him a weirdo.

你不准叫他怪咖

You don't think he's a weirdo

你不觉得他是怪咖吗

Of course he's a weirdo.

他当然是怪咖

You just can't say it.

但你不能说出来

Oh I didn't think it was that big a deal.

我没想到这事有这么严重

Well it is. He and I are friends

就有我和他是朋友

and if you don't stop makin' fun of him

如果你再继续嘲笑他

you and I are gonna have a problem.

我和你就没完了

Are you saying that I'm being naughty

你意思是我不乖

and you're threatening to punish me

你威胁要惩罚人家吗

'Cause I might like that.

我可能会很享受哦

See you're tryin' to be mad at me and you can't.

瞧你想生我的气但你做不到

Now you are getting punished.

现在你绝对要被惩罚调教了

Check please

麻烦买单

Mom.

妈妈

Oh baby. What are you doing out of bed

宝贝你怎么起床了

I don't need to be in bed.

我不需要躺在床上休息

I'm not sick.

我没生病

What

什么

I lied to you

我欺骗了你

so that I wouldn't have to take the swim test.

因为我想逃避游泳考试

You lied

你说谎了

I feel terrible about it.

我觉得很内疚

Well you should feel terrible.

你当然该感到内疚

I trusted you.

我那么相信你

I'm sorry. It's just that I was so afraid to get in that pool

对不起但我真的太害怕进入泳池

so I let Georgie and Missy teach me how to fake it.

所以我让小乔治和米希教我如何装病

They said it was easy but it's wasn't.

他们说很简单但并不简单

It really wasn't.

一点都不简单

Georgie and Missy taught you how to do this

小乔治和米希教你怎么装病的吗

I cannot tell a lie they sure did

我绝对不能说谎就是他们干的

Okay calm down.

好了别激动

Now you listen to me you shouldn't have lied.

听我说你不应该说谎

It's always wrong.

说谎任何时候都是错的

But you made up for it by telling me the truth.

但现在你告诉我真相弥补了自己的过错

So you forgive me

那你原谅我了吗

I do but...

是的但是

I need you to do me a favor.

我需要你帮我一个忙

As far as your father is concerned you were sick.

在你爸面前继续装病

Isn't that lying

那不算欺骗吗

Honestly

老实说

No.

不算

The following day I returned to school.

第二天我回到学校

I had no choice but to fulfill my swimming requirement.

我别无选择只得乖乖下水游泳

Much like Batman

就像蝙蝠侠一样

I suited up and faced my fears.

我穿上全套战服直面我的恐惧

Unlike Batman I did it with a doggy paddle

但没有蝙蝠侠那么英勇我只是用狗爬式

across the shallow end of the pool.

游过泳池浅水区

Uh regarding pool sanitation

至于泳池的卫生情况

it turned out I was right.

结果证明我是对的

It was teeming with germs.

里面充满了大量细菌

Only I was the one who put them there.

只不过细菌都是我放进去的

As it happens

原来

my interaction with Billy Sparks

我和比利·斯帕克斯的接触

did get me sick.

果然让我染上病了

I in turn created a small epidemic

我因此制造了一场小流行病

taking down 128 students

放倒了128名学生

four teachers...

四名教师

and one principal.

以及一位校长

It didn't stop there.

还不止这样

I also infected my mother

我还传染给了我妈妈

father

我爸爸

sister brother

我姐我哥

Meemaw...

姥姥

and Meemaw's friend Dale.

以及姥姥的朋友戴尔

The newliest established boundries of friendship

最新制定的友谊界限

helped keep doctor Sturgis healthy.

帮助斯特吉斯博士保持健康

However in an unrelated incident

然而在一场与之无关的意外中

he crashed his bike in some garbage cans.

他骑单车撞向了垃圾桶

Luckily he landed on his recently acquired athletic cup.

幸运的是他最近购买的运动护裆保护了他

That was a wise pruchase.

这护裆真是买对了

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