小谢尔顿-S02E14_小谢尔顿

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Nobody else is stronger than I am

世上没人比我强壮

Yesterday I moved a mountain

昨天我移了一座山

I bet I could be your hero

我相信我能当你的英雄

I am a mighty little man

我是个了不起的小家伙

I am a mighty little man

我是个了不起的小家伙

百万年以前

A fossil is formed

一个化石的形成

when an organism preserved in sediment

是当一个有机体被沉积物

undergoes physical compression over millions of years.

通过物理压缩上百万年而保存下来

Less than one ten thousandth percent

只有少于十万分之一的

of living organisms will become fossils.

有机体会变成化石

Isn't it amazing

是不是很厉害啊

that something so fragile can defy those odds

这么脆弱的物体可以在如此低的几率下存活

only to have this happen to it...

只为了让自己能遭受如此待遇

I don't think you did that right.

我觉得你没做对

All right everyone

好啦各位

we'll pick it up here tomorrow. I If we're lucky

我们明天再继续如果我们运气好

we may find a fossil as old as lunch lady Phyllis.

我们能找到跟食堂大妈菲利丝一样老的化石

You people don't know what's funny.

你们这些小兔崽子不懂什么好笑

Cooper

库珀

Will you put these away for me

你能帮我把这个拿去放好吗

Sure.

没问题

You better watch yourself.

你招子给我放亮点

I will I I really will.

我会我会的

'Cause you know what's gonna happen if you don't.

你知道你不识相的话会发生什么事吧

Who was that

那是谁啊

No one.

没谁

Why did he push you

他为什么推你

None of your business.

不关你的事

But that was a clear violation of the student code of conduct.

但他很明显违反了校规啊

We need to tell on him.

我们得去告他状

We're not telling on anyone stay out of it.

我们不去告谁状别多事

But the student code of conduct...

但校规...

Drop it.

别插手

So I did drop it...

所以我没插手

for six whole minutes.

整整6分钟

Excuse me sir.

先生抱歉打扰了

When you're done urinating I'd like to ask you

当你小便完我想问问你

some questions about social dynamics intimidation

有关一些社交上的问题比如恐吓

threats et cetera.

威胁之类的事情

Finish up no hurry.

您慢尿不着急

What is your problem

你找我有啥事

Oh I don't have a problem.

我没有什么事

You should probably wash your hands.

你应该洗一下手

I just witnessed an altercation between you and Georgie Cooper.

我刚才目睹了你与小乔治·库珀有些争执

Altercation

争执

A confrontation a tussle. Anyway

对峙争斗总而言之

I'd just like to gather more information

我想要搜集一些资料

for sociological purposes.

纯属社会学研究用途

Oh I heard about you you're that smart kid.

我听说过你你是那个小天才

I'd like to be humble in this moment but yes that's me.

我虽然很想谦虚一下但是的正是在下

Sheldon Cooper at your service.

谢尔顿·库珀恭候大驾

So Georgie's your brother Correct.

-所以小乔治是你哥哥 -是的

And you're trying to protect him

你是想来保护他吗

Incorrect. I'm just curious what he did to incur your wrath.

错了我只是好奇他是哪里引起了你的愤怒

Also kudos on the hand washing.

另外你手洗得很干净很棒

Your brother's a punk.

你哥就是个小瘪三

I'm not familiar with that terminology.

我对这词不太熟悉

He tried to hit on my girlfriend.

他想泡我女朋友

Interesting. So he openly pursued your mate

有意思所以他公开追求你的伴侣

and to re assert dominance

而你为了维护主权

you threatened him with physical violence.

你通过肢体暴力威慑他

Hell yeah I did.

老子就是这意思

I understand that.

我理解

I often intimidate people with my intelligence.

我也常用智力来威慑别人

Well one of us scared him.

我们其中一个人吓跑了他

All right.

好了

Next. Missy Cooper.

下一位米希·库珀

Just a heads up this is my good side.

我先提醒一下这面是我上相的那面

Okay...

好吧

Do your parents know you're wearing that makeup

你的父母知道你化妆了吗

Oh yeah my mom knows.

知道我妈妈知道

You sure Because typically it's not allowed.

你确定吗因为正常来说是不允许的

If you don't believe me you can ask her.

你要是不相信你可以去问她

Okay we're gonna give her a call.

行我去给她打个电话

Really

不是吧

Good news I just spoke to Tommy Clarkson.

好消息我刚跟汤米·克拉克森谈过了

What Are you crazy

什么你疯啦

Nope Mom had me tested.

不疯妈带我去检查过了

And Tommy's actually nicer than you think.

其实汤米人比你想象中好多了

I told you to stay out of it.

我教你别插手了

True but what you didn't tell me

的确但你没跟我说过

was that you were overly chummy with his girlfriend

你对人家女朋友过分亲密

which is why he wants to kick your bottom.

这导致了他想踹你的屁屁

I'm about to kick your bottom.

我也马上要踹你的屁屁了

I don't think so.

恕我不同意

H Hey Tommy.

你好啊汤米

How you doing

你好吗

You got a problem with him you got a problem with me.

你对他有意见就是对我有意见

And just to make his logic clear

我来理一下逻辑

you do have a problem with me.

你的确对我有意见

Don't listen to my brother I don't have a problem with anybody.

别听我弟弟说的话我对任何人都没意见

You need to apologize.

你得道歉

I I'm very sorry.

我很对不起

To him.

对他道歉

I'm very sorry Sheldon.

我很对不起谢尔顿

Later kid.

再见啦小伙子

See He's nice.

你看他人很好

What were you even thinking

你都在想什么呢

I was thinking I look hot.

我想看起来漂亮

You know you're not allowed to wear makeup.

你知道你不准化妆

That's why I didn't tell you.

所以我没告诉你啊

And who gave it to you Heather B. Heather M.

谁给你的海瑟一号还是海瑟二号

Meemaw.

姥姥

So your grandmother was okay with you looking like this

所以你姥姥同意你在学校照片上

in your school pictures

看起来是这副样子

If you don't believe me ask her.

你要是不信我就去问她啊

Oh I'm going to.

我绝对要问

Really

不是吧

These are the plaintiffs

他们是原告

Valerie and Anthony Sines.

瓦莱丽与安东尼·锡尼什

Valerie claims she was sitting on the front steps

瓦莱丽表示她当时正与自己的猫斯坎皮

of her condo with her cat Scampi

坐在自己公寓的前廊

and that's when his dog went after Scampi injuring her.

就是那时安东尼的狗冲上去弄伤了斯坎皮

What are you watching ‭Go away.

-你在看什么 -你走开

Are you angry with me

你在生我气吗

I don't want to see your face right now.

我现在不想看到你

Very well but I'd like to watch Professor Proton.

没问题但我现在想看《质子教授》

Did you hear me Go away.

你听到我说的话了吗走开

Well did you hear me

那你听到我说的话了吗

I'd like to watch Professor Proton.

我想看《质子教授》

Too bad. ‭ Interesting.

-怪我咯 -有意思

I wonder how my new friend Tommy Clarkson

不知道我的新朋友汤米·克拉克森

would feel about this.

对此事会有何看法

Well he's not here is he

他现在不在这里是吧

No he's not.

他的确是不在

I guess I'll just have to call him.

那看来我只能打个电话给他了

You're kidding.

你不是吧

Are you ready to put on Professor Proton

准备好转到《质子教授》的台了吗

No.

我不

Okay okay.

行行行

Thank you.

谢谢

I didn't hear a "You're welcome."

我没听到你说"不客气"

Shut up

闭嘴啦

We'll work on that.

这方面以后再慢慢加强

It's time for science

科学的时刻到啦

‭Hello.

你们好啊

Well don't you look like Madonna

看起来真像麦当娜啊

Thank you.

谢谢

I was actually trying to look like you.

我其实是在画成你

Thank you.

谢谢

Why would you give her makeup without talking to me first

你为什么不先跟我说就给她化妆品

I didn't give her any makeup.

我没给她化妆品啊

Well then one of you is lying.

你们其中有一个人在说谎

She is. She is.

-是她 -是她

Time to come clean little lady.

是时候说实话了小妞

I ain't taking the hit on this one.

我才不要帮你挡这一枪

I took the makeup from Meemaw's bag.

我从姥姥的手袋里拿的化妆品

Oh Missy you are in a world of trouble.

米希你摊上事儿了

Calm down it's not that big a deal.

冷静哪是什么大事

It is so a big deal

事儿可大了

She stole from you and then she lied about it.

她偷你东西还撒谎

I know but come on she's only ten.

我知道但拜托她才十岁

She's gonna do way stupider stuff when she's older.

等她再大一点她会做更蠢的事情

Guaranteed.

肯定会

I don't care.

我才不管

She is my daughter and you will be punished.

她是我女儿你一定会受惩罚

Sorry kid.

抱歉啦孩子

I wish I was your daughter.

真希望我是你的女儿

Is that so

是吗

Well guess what

那这样吧

You're sleeping here tonight

你今晚就在这过夜

because I don't feel like being around either one of you.

因为我不想看到你们俩任何一个

Great

太好啦

Yeah great.

对啊太好啦

Georgie be a lamb and get me a Yoo hoo.

小乔治当个好人帮我拿个巧克力饮料

Get your own.

自己拿

Hmm. Are you sure you want to speak to me in that tone of voice

你确定你要用这种语气跟我说话吗

Sheldon I'm getting real tired of this.

谢尔顿我快受够了

That's too bad. I'm enjoying it quite a bit.

那可惜了我还挺享受呢

Still waiting on that Yoo hoo.

还在等我的饮料呢

You think you're so tough now

你现在觉得自己是狠角色了是吧

I swear one day I'm...

我发誓有一天我一定要...

Hey. What's going on

怎么回事

Sheldon's being a jerk.

谢尔顿在耍贱

That true

是这样吗

All I did was ask for a Yoo hoo.

我只请他帮我拿了瓶饮料

He's leaving out the part where he...

他没说他还...

Forget it.

算了

Great. Done.

很好那没事啦

Georgie at the risk of repeating myself...

小乔治我不想再重复多说

And one from the back so it's cold.

记得拿放后面的比较凉

So when exactly did you swipe my makeup

所以你是什么时候偷我的化妆品的

While you were at bowling league.

你在打保龄球的时候

You don't have a key to this house.

你没有我家的钥匙啊

How'd you get in

你怎么进来的

Can't tell you that.

不能告诉你

I might need to do it again.

我可能还要用这招

Unbelievable.

难以置信

And for future reference go lighter on the blush

提醒你一下不要刷太多腮红

or you'll end up looking like Raggedy Ann.

否则你会像破烂娃娃安

She got Raggedy Andy looking like that.

她化成这样才吸引了破烂娃娃安迪

He's her brother. ‭

他是她的兄弟

I've been playing with those dolls all wrong.

那看来我一直玩错这些娃娃了

All right that'll do it.

好的可以了

How old was Mom when you let her wear makeup

妈妈几岁时你允许她化妆

I don't know I didn't really have rules like that.

我不知道我没有那方面的规矩

See How come you're so cool and she's such a dud

瞧为什么你这么酷而她是个老古板

Well I wouldn't call her a dud.

我可不会说她古板

What would you call her

你会叫她什么

Point is she wasn't always like that.

重点是她并不是一直这样

What was she like

她以前是什么样

When she was a teenager she was just wild.

她还是少女时相当叛逆

Really ‭Oh yeah.

-真的吗 -是的

She used to wait until I went to sleep

她总是等到我睡着了

and then she would sneak out

溜出家门

and get into trouble with her friends.

和朋友一起闯祸

My mom ‭Your mom.

-我妈 -你妈

And then she would climb up the tree

然后她会爬树

on the side of the house and sneak back in.

溜回房间

Amazing.

厉害

Is that how you're getting in

你是这样进来的吗

I will never tell you that.

我永远不会告诉你

Everything okay

还好吗

I'm getting tired of being the bad guy around here.

我已经厌倦了做坏人

You're not the bad guy.

你不是坏人

Kids need boundaries.

孩子们需要规矩

That is easy for you to say. I am the only one doing it

你说起来容易只有我去执行规矩

and then everyone resents me for it.

所以大家都讨厌我

Hey you're not the only one.

不是只有你

Just today Georgie and Sheldon were fighting

今天小乔治和谢尔顿吵架

and I totally took care of it.

我搞定了

Really What was going on

是吗出什么事了

They... you know boy stuff.

他们... 男孩的事

I...

我

Don't worry. I got your back.

别担心有我挺你

Thank you. That means a lot.

谢谢你意义重大

Teamwork babe.

团队合作亲爱的

Look right...

看就在

here.

这里

That's my mom

这是我妈吗

Yep the little queen of darkness.

小小的黑暗女王

Is she smoking a cigarette

她在抽烟吗

Yep. Probably stole it from me.

对可能是偷我的

When did she stop being cool

她什么时候不再这么酷了

Well first of all smoking is not cool.

首先抽烟并不酷

You do it. ‭Yeah well next time

-你抽烟 -对下次

I'm hocking up some black goo out of my lung

我从肺里咳出黑色粘液时

I'll call you over and you can see how cool it is.

我可以叫你来看看有多酷

Awesome. It is not awesome.

-厉害 -一点也不厉害

And as far as your mom I think things started

至于你妈妈她的转变

to turn around for her when she gave birth to you.

是从生你时开始的

You mean me and Sheldon.

你是说生我和谢尔顿

No I mean you.

不我是说你

I mean Sheldon was born fine but you were a different story.

谢尔顿出生时没事但你则不同了

Why

为什么

Okay.

好吧

Well there was a point where the doctors didn't know

有那么一会儿医生不知道

if you were gonna make it.

你能否活下来

And your mom got so scared and she made a promise to God

你妈非常害怕她对上帝发誓

that if you were okay that she would start reading the Bible

如果你没事她会开始读《圣经》

going to church...

去教堂

you know that kind of stuff.

反正就是那些事

So I'm the reason she's a dud

我是她成为老古板的原因

Your takeaway should be

你应该领悟的是

that you are the reason she's such a good mom which she is.

你是她成为好妈妈的原因她的确是好妈妈

And the next time you hurt her feelings

你下次伤害她的感情时

which you will

而你一定会的

you might remember how much you mean to her.

你最好记得你对她来说有多重要

Now I feel bad.

现在我内疚了

Good.

很好

News of my friendship with Tommy

我和汤米是朋友的消息

had apparently spread.

显然已经传了

So much so the student body was finally

以至于全体学生终于

treating me with the respect I deserved

给了我我应得的尊重

even when Tommy wasn't around.

哪怕汤米不在的时候

This must be how Carl Sagan felt

这肯定就是卡尔·萨根

知名天文学天体物理学科幻作家

walking through the halls of PBS.

走过公共广播公司走廊的感觉

Like Superman in a phone booth

就像超人在电话亭变装一样

I was no stranger to undressing in my gym locker.

我也总是在体育馆储物柜里更衣

But not today.

但今天不是

Thanks to Tommy I was invincible.

多亏了汤米我无人可敌

All right get your butts out to the gym.

好了大家快去体育馆

Wind sprints in one minute.

一分钟后冲刺跑

Come on Jason I'm gonna be late.

拜托杰森我快迟到了

Poor baby.

可怜的孩子

Excuse me.

打扰一下

I'd like to ask you some questions

我想问你一些关于

about your use of intimidation to dominate others.

你通过恐吓来支配他人的问题

Are you trying to get your ass kicked

你是想被揍吗

No I was just looking to open a spirited dialogue.

不我只是想展开一段精彩的对话

And you might want to unhand me.

而且你最好放开我

I'm friends with Tommy Clarkson.

我是汤米·克拉克森的朋友

Is that so

是这样吗

Yes.

是的

Hello Tommy.

你好汤米

I have some unfortunate news.

我有些不幸的消息

What's that ‭ I boasted to Jason Davies that you're my friend

-什么事 -我向杰森·戴维夸口你是我的朋友

and things took an unexpected turn.

结果令人意外

You're scheduled to fight him at 3 00 P.M. on the basketball court.

你被安排在下午3点和他在篮球场打架

I don't want to fight Jason Davies.

我不想和杰森·戴维打架

I don't think you have a choice. He was pretty adamant.

我想你别无选择他语气挺坚定

Fine I'll deal with it.

好我去解决

You do have the option of simply not showing up.

你可以选择不去

That's not how fights work Sheldon.

打架的规矩不是这样的谢尔顿

Why Do they take attendance

为什么要计考勤吗

What on Earth did you say to Missy

你对米希说了什么

Why What'd she do now Nothing

-怎么了她又做了什么 -没什么

she was an angel.

她乖得像天使

I dropped her off at school

我送她上学

and she hugged me in front of her friends.

她在朋友面前拥抱我

Really ‭And not just any friends.

-是吗 -不只是普通朋友

Heather M. Was there and that is a big deal.

海瑟二号在场这可是大事

I just gave her a little life advice.

我只是给了她一点人生建议

Like what

怎么说

Nothing just grandma stuff.

没什么只是姥姥说的话

There you go again being the good guy.

又来了你做好人

Mary you need to know

玛丽你要知道

you're doing a fantastic job with those kids.

你把孩子们教育得很好

You really mean that

你是真心的吗

I really do. ‭Thanks.

-是的 -谢谢

I can't remember the last time someone said I was a good mom.

我都不记得上次有人说我是好妈妈是什么时候了

It's not a job that gets a lot of compliments.

做母亲不是会经常得到表扬的工作

Look at this my mother left me a note.

看我妈给我留了字条

"You can do better. Mom."

"你可以做得更好妈妈留"

Not "Love Mom " not "XO Mom "

不是"爱你的妈妈" 不是"拥抱亲亲妈妈"

just "Mom."

只有"妈妈"

While Tam prattled on about some family nonsense

丹说着关于家人的狗屁时

I couldn't help but think about Tommy.

我忍不住想到汤米

at 3 00 pm he was going to engage in a schoolyard battle

下午3点他将参加一场校园战役

that was entirely my fault.

这全是我的错

I had to find a way to intervene but how

我必须想办法调停但怎么做呢

Ooh a Nutter Butter.

奶油饼干

Maybe she does love me.

也许她真的爱我

Come on Jason. Kick his ass.

加油杰森揍死他

I didn't have the physical stature to assist Tommy in a brawl

我没有能够帮助汤米打架的身材

but I did have something far more lethal

但我有更致命的东西

my once in a generation brain.

我那划时代的大脑

科学教室

Fight Fight Fight Fight

打打打打...

I didn't think you'd show up.

没想到你敢来

Well I did.

我来了

Let's do this.

来吧

Stop

住手

You're not fighting Tommy you're fighting me.

你不和汤米打你和我打

Oh boy.

天啊

Unless you want to shake hands

除非你愿意握手

and we all laugh about this over a glass of milk.

喝一杯牛奶大家一笑置之

I think I'd rather kick both your asses.

我更愿意揍你们两个

I was afraid you'd say that.

我就担心你这样说

Are you familiar with the story

你知道《圣经》中

of David and Goliath from the Bible

大卫和哥利亚的故事吗

Yeah.

知道

That's too bad.

太遗憾了

I had a nice speech prepared.

我本来准备了精彩的演讲

I'll say it anyway.

我还是说吧

You may have the size advantage

虽然你在体形上有优势

but like David and his sling

但和有投石器的大卫一样

I also possess an air based weapon.

我也有空基武器

So I'll give you one more chance.

所以我再给你一次机会

Are you willing to step down

你愿意离开吗

I'll tell you what

我跟你说

you take the first shot then it's my turn.

你先射然后到我

Very well.

好的

Three...

三

...two...

二

...one.

一

Ow Son of a bitch

他娘的

I'm going to run.

我要跑了

Conventional wisdom tells us

传统智慧告诉我们

that when one stands up to a bully

当有人起身对抗霸凌者时

the bully will inevitably back down and respect you for your courage.

霸凌者必然退却并尊重你的勇气

My experience suggests otherwise.

我的经历不是这样

Hello Hello

有人吗有人吗

When Jason finally caught me

当杰森最终抓到我时

he had the good sense not to commit assault and battery.

他还算理智没有犯下暴力殴打罪

This did not however prevent him

但也没能阻止他

from imprisoning me in his locker.

把我关在他的储物柜里

Anybody

有人吗

That was a very long night.

那是漫长的一夜

It doesn't smell good in here.

这里面好臭

Very long.

非常漫长

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