生活大爆炸-S12E02_生活大爆炸

S01

But I think by the end of the honeymoon

不过我觉得到了蜜月尾声

we really started to feel like a married couple.

我们真的开始有已婚夫妇感了

But the good kind like on TV

是好的那种像电视里那样

not like my parents. Yeah.

-不是像我父母 -是的

You're not a real married couple until you can pee

真正的夫妻是当你可以撒尿不关门

with the door open and she's okay with it.

而你老婆也无所谓时才算

I told you I'm not okay with it.

我跟你说过我有所谓

She loves it.

她爱死了

So we got everybody gifts.

我们给大家都买了礼物

Did you forget about us until you were at the airport

你们是不是到机场了才想起我们啊

No.

才不是

We forgot about you until we were on the plane.

我们是到飞机上了才想起你们来

Luckily there was Wi Fi

幸好飞机上有无线网

and I have Amazon Prime.

而我有网络商城高速送货服务

I heart New York.

我❤纽约

Aw the baby's gonna love throwing up on this.

宝宝一定会很喜欢吐在这上面

Look it doesn't have to just be New York.

听我说这不见得只能代表纽约啊

That's the beauty of it.

这才是其中的奥妙之处

Uh the initials "N.Y." can stand for anything you like.

这个缩写可以代表很多你们喜爱的事物

For instance I understand that there is

举个例子我听说有一个

an elderly rock and roll musician named Neil Young.

知名的老年摇滚歌手尼尔·杨

Perhaps you heart him.

或许你们喜欢他啊

Or if not him Egyptian table tennis silver medalist

如果对他无感埃及银牌乒乓球手

Noha Yossry.

诺哈·亚瑟里

Or Nana Yamaguchi

也可以是山口奈奈

the Japanese voice actress

她是日本的女声优

who starred in Sally the Witch.

曾给卡通《仙女下凡》配过音

Did you just Google the initials "N.Y."

你上网查了有谁缩写是N.Y.的吗

I had Wi Fi and a long plane flight.

飞行时间长而又刚好有网

Draw your own conclusions.

你推理推理吧

Well guys that was very very thoughtful of you. I...

两位这礼物真是非常有心了我...

Did you get me a double XL

你们给我买了XXL号的吗

I told you. You were right dear.

-我跟你说太大了吧 -你说对了亲爱的

Sheldon that's not how you write a thank you card.

谢尔顿感谢函不是这么写的

What's wrong with it

我写的有哪里不对

"Dear Aunt Helen

"亲爱的海伦阿姨

Thank you so much for the lovely place setting.

谢谢您送给我们的这套令人喜爱的餐具

If my handwriting looks strained

如果我的字迹看起来不太自然

that is because this is the 16th thank you card

那是因为这是我被艾米逼着写的

Amy has forced me to write.

第16张感谢函

The muscles in my wrist are cramping

我忍着用肌肉在抽筋的手腕

as I struggle to finish this sentence.

艰苦地写完这句子

Ow ow oh the pain.

哎哟哎哟疼死我了

Love Sheldon."

爱你的谢尔顿敬上"

Fine.

行行行

"And Amy."

"谢尔顿与艾米敬上"

This one is from Leonard and Penny.

这份礼物是莱纳德与佩妮送的

"The perfect gift for the perfect couple."

"完美的礼物赠于最完美的夫妇"

Save that card. We may need to throw it back in their faces.

卡先留着礼物不满意就把卡甩回他们脸上

I wonder what it could be.

我真好奇会是什么东西

Oh could be anything.

什么东西都有可能

A flute a letter opener

一支长笛一把拆信刀

one of those pens

或是带裸女图的笔

where you put the bikini back on the naked lady.

把笔正着拿墨水就会变成遮羞的比基尼

Isn't this nice

这东西不错啊

What is it

这是什么

You know it's uh

你懂的就是...

it's one of those...

就是那个...

Nope doesn't do that.

不是没作用

Oh maybe it's candy.

或许是糖果

Lick it.

舔舔看

I don't want to lick it. You lick it.

我才不要舔你舔吧

I'm not gonna lick it. I just brushed my teeth.

我才不要舔我刚刷完牙

Is it from one of your dumb sci fi shows

是你看的弱智科幻电视剧里的东西吗

Uh none of the sci fi shows I watch are dumb.

我看的科幻电视剧都不弱智好吗

Sheldon... Okay Westworld.

-谢尔顿少来 -好啦《西部世界》弱智

But this has nothing to do with that show

但这跟那部剧没有任何关联啊

other than it's also inexplicable.

唯一的关联大概就是都令人懵逼

Well Leonard and Penny are our best friends.

莱纳德与佩妮是我们最好的朋友

They know us better than anyone.

他们比谁都了解我们俩

They said it's the perfect gift.

他们说这是完美的礼物

We must be missing something.

那我们肯定是漏了什么细节

You don't...

你不会...

think it's a marital aid do you

觉得这是婚姻"辅助棒"吧

Don't be silly.

别犯傻了

Amy how is this big glass shaft going to aid our marriage

艾米这根玻璃大棒哪里能辅助我们的婚姻啊

Do you think when Krypto the Superdog is out flying

你觉得当超级狗英雄在外面乱飞时

Superman has to fly after him with a little baggie

超人得拿着捡屎袋跟在它后面吗

Hmm. Haven't really thought about it before.

这点以前我还真没想过

But he doesn't need a baggie

但超人应该不需要用捡屎袋

because he just blasts the poop with his heat vision.

他可以直接用热能光线把屎给炸了

You've thought about it before.

你以前绝对想过这件事

Oh I've thought about it a lot.

其实我可常想了

What is wrong with Stuart's face

斯图尔特的脸出了什么问题

I think he's smiling.

他好像是在微笑

Oh my God are they flirting

天啊他们是在聊骚吗

Oh they're way past flirting.

他们早就过了聊骚期

I caught them making out at Sheldon's wedding.

我抓到他们在谢尔顿的婚礼上亲热了

Are you sure she wasn't trying to breathe life back into him

你确定她不是在帮他做人工呼吸吗

I don't think so.

应该不是

When I used that much tongue at CPR training

当我在心肺复苏课上伸那么多舌头时

I had to buy the dummy.

他们会逼我买下那假人

Ooh I have class.

我有课

I should go.

我该走了

Oh. Okay.

好的

Bye. Bye.

-再见 -再见

See ya guys.

大家再见

Bye. Bye.

-再见 -再见啦

So what's her deal

她现在是怎么样

Is she into you or does she just hate her parents

她是真对你有意思还是想气自己父母

I I don't know.

我不知道啊

We kissed a little at the wedding

我们在婚礼上亲热了一下

and it was great.

感觉一切很美好

But we haven't really talked about it since then.

但之后我们没有好好谈过

So I I don't know how she feels about me.

所以我也不知道她对我有何感觉

Well she patted you on the head

她摸了摸你的头

so I'm guessing she feels like you're such a good boy

所以我猜她觉得你是个乖狗狗

Seriously do you think I should ask her out

说认真的你们觉得我该去约她吗

A Absolutely.

必须啊

Don't let love get away.

别让真爱溜走

It is the most important thing in the world.

爱情是世界上最重要的东西

Without it life is dark and meaningless and all you're left with

没了爱情生命一片黑暗且毫无意义

is the judgmental gaze of your dog

你剩下的就只有

as you finish off a bag of Doritos on the toilet.

独自在马桶上吃完零食后你家狗鄙视的眼神

Thanks.

谢谢你

You're a real good pal.

你真是个好朋友

And now you're a good boy

你现在也是乖狗狗啦

I can't stop thinking about that present.

我无法停止想那个礼物是什么

It's driving me crazy.

我快要发疯了

Me too

我也是

The card said it was the perfect gift.

卡片写着那是完美的礼物

But it's not a dinosaur fossil or matching pocket watches

但它不是恐龙化石也不是情侣怀表

so I don't see how it can be.

所以我看不出它如何能完美

Maybe we're trying too hard.

或许是我们想太多了

Maybe it's something simple.

它可能很简单

Like Leonard and Penny.

就像他们夫妇一样头脑简单

Yes good.

很好有道理

We just need to think like them.

我们只需要进入他们的思维

Okay.

好

What gift can I get us

有什么礼物能送谢家夫妇

to express how grateful we are to have us in their lives

来表达对他们进入我们生命的感谢之情

Way to make it simple.

你可真会简化啊

I'm just gonna ask them.

我直接去问他们吧

No you can't it'll hurt their feelings.

不行这会伤了他们的感情

I'm okay with that.

这我无所谓啊

And they'll know you weren't smart enough

而且他们也会知道你不够聪明

to figure it out on your own.

来解出他们送了什么礼物

You're right. Oh this is awful.

你说得对这真是太讨厌了

And I can't even comfort myself by stroking

而且我都不能靠抚摸

the fossilized tibia of a Pentaceratops.

五角龙胫骨化石来安慰自己

Let's just go to sleep.

我们先睡一觉吧

We'll look at it in the morning with fresh eyes

一觉醒来我们就能用全新视角来看

and maybe it'll come to us.

说不定一切就会水到渠成

Fine.

好吧

Or we go tear apart that box and look for a clue.

又或者我们去拆了那盒子寻找线索

Staying up past my bedtime and solving mysteries

过了我睡眠时间不睡觉去玩解谜游戏

Who knew married life could be this good

谁能想到婚姻生活会如此美好

What's wrong with his face

他的脸出了什么问题

A lot of people have been asking that.

最近很多人都问过这个问题

He's... smiling.

他在...微笑

Hey Stuart you look pretty happy.

斯图尔特你看起来心情很好啊

Oh yeah.

是啊

I uh asked Denise out on a date

我约德妮丝去约会

and she said yes.

她答应了

Aw. That's great.

太好了

But don't smile like that in front of Halley.

但别在哈雷面前这样笑

She just started sleeping through the night.

她最近才开始能一觉睡到天亮

Sorry. I'm excited.

抱歉我很兴奋

I haven't been on a date in a long time.

我很久没约过会了

Back when I was dating

我还约会那会儿

I'd always wear a new pair of underwear just in case.

我总会穿新内裤以免"艳福"来了不好看

It's also been a long time since I bought new underwear.

我也很久没买过新内裤了

And I probably should

估计该买了

because these are no longer tighty nor whitey.

从紧身白内裤变成松垮灰破裤了

Okay I'm out.

老娘要闪人了

If there's a chance someone's gonna see you naked

当别人有机会看到你的裸体时

it's also polite to make sure you're well groomed down there.

你先修剪梳理好"杂毛"是基本礼仪

I get it Howard. I've been busy

知道了霍华德老娘最近太忙了

Hello.

你们好呀

I just wanted to pop over and hand deliver this thank you note

我想过来亲手把感谢信交给你们

for your very thoughtful wedding gift.

感谢你们送了贴心的新婚礼物

Oh good. You guys liked it

真好你们喜欢那个礼物吗

Well we liked it a lot more than things that aren't it

喜欢它多过喜欢不是它的事物

I'll tell you that.

我就这么说吧

Well yeah that's great.

那可太好了

Because when we saw it we thought

因为我们看到这东西时便想到

"Amy and Sheldon just have to have that."

"艾米和谢尔顿必须得有这个"

Oh do tell. Now paint a picture for me

愿闻其详把当时的情形描述一下

like where you were when you found it

这礼物你们在哪发现的

and what you thought we'd enjoy doing with it.

你们觉得我们会喜欢用它来做什么

Do you not know what it is

你是不是不知道那是什么

Of course he knows what it is.

他当然知道了

He's the smartest man in the world.

他可是全世界最聪明的人

Well I don't know about the world.

全世界我可不敢肯定

Some of those Chinese fellas are pretty clever.

还有些也挺聪明的中国人呢

Now if you'll excuse me

失陪一下

I'm going to return home and use your gift

我要回家使用你们送的礼物

in the manner which it was intended.

而且是按它原本的用途来使用

He He's never gonna figure it out.

他永远都不会猜到

I know.

就是啊

What are you

你到底是什么鬼

Gosh this makes me happy. Yeah.

-我真是要开心坏了 -对啊

Howard I don't often say this

霍华德这话我不常说

but good you're here. Now

但你在这真的太好了

do you know what Leonard and Penny got us for our wedding gift

你知道莱纳德夫妇送了什么新婚礼物给我们吗

Well... Don't answer.

-这个嘛 -别回答

I don't want to know.

我不想知道答案

I just want to know if you know.

我只想知道你是否知道

I do know. Okay great.

-我知道 -很好

I believe that Amy and I have figured it out.

我认为我和艾米已经猜到了

Is it a clue to a scavenger hunt

礼物是不是寻宝游戏的线索

that will lead us to the actual present

它将会指引我们找到真正的礼物

If you're asking

如果你是在问

if you and Amy should spend the next couple days

你和艾米未来几天是否该满城跑

running all over town searching for the next clue

寻找下一条线索

I'm gonna have to say yes.

那我只能说是的

I knew it

我就知道

This is so much fun.

这太好玩了

Oh it really is.

真的好玩死了

Oh Leonard thank you again.

莱纳德再次谢谢你

We love the gift.

我们爱死那份礼物了

Does he know what it is

他知道那是什么了吗

No not even close.

边都没沾上

He thinks it's a clue to a scavenger hunt.

他以为礼物是寻宝游戏的线索

So so happy.

小爷我开心坏了

Well what is it What did you give them

你们送了什么礼物给他们

Oh I it's just this dumb crystal wand

就是我们结婚时

that Howard and Bernadette gave us for our wedding.

霍华德夫妇送给我们的一根智障水晶棒

Penny and I made each other miserable

佩妮和我想得头都大了

trying to figure out what it was and we thought

都没猜到是什么于是我们寻思

"Why not pass that fun along to Sheldon and Amy."

"不如把这份乐趣传给谢尔顿和艾米吧"

Wait a minute. Did

等等你...

did you give them the crystal chakra wand

你把我送给你们的结婚礼物

that I gave you for your wedding

水晶脉轮能量棒送给他们了吗

Yeah that's exactly what we did.

对我们是这么做了

You said you liked it

你说你喜欢这礼物啊

Yeah that's exactly what I said.

对我是这么说了

Wow. A scavenger hunt.

寻宝游戏啊

That's exciting.

真令人兴奋

I had a bit of a scavenger hunt myself last night.

我昨晚也玩了寻宝游戏

I was trying to find the remote.

我想找遥控器

I looked under one of the cushions.

找了一下沙发坐垫底下

Wasn't there.

没有

Then I lifted the cushion a little higher.

然后我把坐垫再掀高一点

Bingo.

找到了

Riveting.

精彩

So do you know what it is

你知道这是什么吗

Of course I know what it is.

我当然知道了

It's a silicon dioxide crystal otherwise known as quartz.

这是二氧化硅晶体也就是石英

Are you sure

你确定吗

Am I sure Is basalt a mafic extrusive igneous rock formed

还我确定吗玄武岩是由富含镁铁的熔岩

by the rapid cooling of magnesium and iron rich lava

快速冷却形成的镁铁质火成岩吗

Yeah I'm sure.

我当然确定了

Okay so it's quartz.

所以是石英

That's got to mean something.

这一定有什么含义

What do we know about quartz

我们对石英有什么认识

I'll Google it.

我上网查一下

Or you can ask me

你也可以问我这个

the geologist who won the MacArthur Genius Grant.

荣获麦克阿瑟天才奖的地质学家

Got it

查到了

Quartz from the German "Quarz"

石英一词来自德语

which sounds the same but is spelled without a "T".

两词发音相同但英语拼写多了一个"T"

Interesting. No "T".

有意思没有"T"

What is not "T"

什么东西非"T"也[音似"茶"]

Coffee

咖啡

The coffee shop where we first met

我们第一次见面的那家咖啡店

All right let's go. Sorry.

好的咱们走抱歉

I think I just had an adrenaline rush from having visitors.

难得有人来找我我不禁肾上腺素飙升

Hey Raj will you um smell something for me

拉杰你能帮我闻个东西吗

Uh that depends.

看情况

Actually it doesn't depend. Just no.

其实不用看我直接拒绝

I'm trying out some new colognes for my date with Denise.

我在试跟德妮丝约会要用的新古龙水

Oh and you just came over here

所以你就直接到我跟前

to rub it in my face that you have a date

炫耀你跟妹子有约会吗

No.

不是

I came over here because I need advice

我来找你是因为我需要建议

and you've gone out with more women than anybody I know.

而你是我认识的人里跟最多妹子约过会的

Huh. I guess you're right.

我想你说得对

Sheldon's the smart one Howard's the funny one

谢尔顿最聪明霍华德最幽默

and apparently I'm the ladies' man.

而本公子很明显是最花的

Which one's Leonard

那莱纳德呢

Oh yeah right.

对哦

I guess Leonard's the forgettable one.

莱纳德应该是最没存在感的

Okay let's have a whiff.

好我来闻一下

Hmm. Smells like Paco Rabanne.

闻起来像帕高·拉巴纳牌的香水

Ooh you're good. I bought it at a swap meet.

你真厉害我在跳蚤市场买的

It's actually called "Smells Like Paco Rabanne."

名字就叫"闻起来像帕高·拉巴纳的香水"

It's great. She's gonna love it.

很好她会喜欢的

I hope so.

但愿如此

I really like Denise and I don't want to screw this up.

我真的很喜欢德妮丝我不想搞砸了

Hey relax.

放轻松

Trust your instincts. That's what I do.

相信你的直觉我就是这么做的

And that works for you

这让你纵横情场了吗

Actually... no.

事实上没有

I've made a mess of my life and I'm...

我把自己的人生搞得一团糟

I'm all alone.

现在孤苦无依

Okay I think it'd be best for both of us

我最好还是假装要走开接电话吧

if I pretend to get a phone call and just walk away.

这样场面不会这么尴尬

Yeah that would be best.

行这样最好

Hello. This is Stuart.

你好我是斯图尔特

Sorry. I got to take this.

抱歉我得接个电话

Uh why yes I'd love to take a survey.

当然我乐意做问卷调查

Okay this is where we first met.

这是我们初次相遇的地方

There's got to be a clue here somewhere.

肯定在某个地方有线索

We sat at that table.

我们坐的是那张桌子

Excuse me.

你这是做什么

I'm sorry. We're on a scavenger hunt.

抱歉我们在寻宝

Just pretend we're not here.

无视我们就行

Oh I found something

我找到了

It's gum.

是口香糖

Maybe they left it behind the counter.

也许他们放在柜台后面

I met my wife here and we sat at this very table

我和妻子在这里相遇当时坐的就是这张桌子

so if you play your cards right in eight years

所以如果你好好表现八年后

you could marry this woman.

你就可以娶这位女士

That's my sister.

这是我妹妹

Well don't tell people. That's not okay.

别说出来兄妹恋可不好

Sheldon look I asked the barista

谢尔顿你看我问咖啡师

if anyone left anything for us

是否有人留东西给我们

and she said to look in this lost and found box.

她让我们在失物招领箱中找

But why would it be in the lost and found box

但为什么会在失物招领箱里

Because we were lost and then we found each other.

因为我们曾经迷失结果找到了彼此

It makes perfect sense.

这太有道理了

Oh. And look at this.

看这个

A locket.

一个吊坠

And that stone in front I bet it's quartz.

上面的石头我打赌是石英

This must be it. This must be the actual gift.

肯定是这个这个才是真正的礼物

Open it up. What's inside

打开里面有什么

Nothing. It's empty.

没东西空的

Of course.

当然了

Our life together is just starting

我们共同的生活才刚刚开始

and they want us to fill it with our memories.

他们希望我们用共同的回忆填满它

This might be the best wedding gift ever.

这可能是史上最贴心的结婚礼物了

They also left us a pair of sunglasses

他们还给我们送了副墨镜

because our future's so bright

因为我们的未来太耀眼了

They thought of everything

他们想得太周到了

Look what Halley drew.

看哈雷的画

Yeah she made it at daycare.

她在托儿所画的

It's pretty good huh

画得真不错啊

Is it

是吗

Wow. Gentile moms are tough.

非犹太妈妈好严格啊

Guys I need to show you something

两位我要给你们看点东西

but you have to promise not to make fun of me.

但你们得保证不能取笑我

Of course.

那当然

Yeah. I was worried about the date

我很担心约会的事

so I got my hair colored to make me feel a little more confident

所以给头发染了色让自己更加自信

but that just made me look paler so I I got a spray tan.

结果更显皮肤苍白所以我去做了美黑

Have you tried showering

你试过冲澡了吗

seeing if you could scrub it off

看是否能擦洗掉

I did.

试了

You're gonna need some new towels.

你们需要买新的毛巾

And a bathmat.

浴室脚垫

And a toilet seat.

还有马桶座圈

I'm picking her up in an hour.

一小时后我就得去接她

What am I gonna do

我该怎么办

Don't you mean what are you gonna

你是不是应该说

"Oompa Loompa doompety do"

"你要呜巴鲁巴怎么办"

《查理和巧克力工厂》里的橙色小矮人唱的歌

You said you weren't gonna make any jokes.

你说你不会嘲笑我的

I'm sorry. I'll stop.

抱歉我不说了

I won't stop.

我不会停

Look it's only a spray tan.

只是喷雾美黑

It'll fade in a couple days.

几天就褪色了

Why don't you cancel the date and reschedule

你不如取消约会再安排时间

Oh but I was really looking forward to tonight.

但我超级期待今晚呢

You know what Then go. Tell her what happened.

那就去吧把实情告诉她

Maybe she'll be flattered. And if not

-也许她会高兴 -如果她不高兴

swing by the chocolate factory and see if they're hiring.

就顺路去巧克力工厂看那里是否招工

That wasn't a joke. That was a legitimate suggestion.

这不是笑话这是真心的建议

Hello

喂

Hey Dad.

老爸

Rajesh. What a nice surprise calling me on my birthday.

拉杰什真是惊喜居然在我生日时打给我

Yes. That's why I'm calling.

对我就是为这事打来的

And and what better gift to give you than the gift

还有什么生日礼物比得上

of marrying an Indian woman just like you've always wanted.

我满足你的期望去娶一个印度女人呢

My goodness Rajesh this is exciting news.

我的天拉杰什这是天大的好消息

Who is she

她是谁

You tell me.

你告诉我啊

What

什么

I want you to arrange a marriage for me.

我希望你帮我安排一桩婚姻

I'm just so tired of being single

我实在是厌倦了单身

and I'm finally just... I'm I'm ready to settle down.

我终于...我准备好成家了

I can't just call up some girl's dad

我不能随便打电话给一个姑娘的爸爸

and make her marry you.

让她嫁给你啊

It's it's not 2015 anymore.

现在可不是2015年的世道了

I know that but I can't do this on my own. I need your help.

我知道但我一个人结不了婚我需要你帮忙

Well then I'm going to need your help too.

那我也需要你的帮助

If I'm going to find a woman to set you up with

如果我要帮你介绍一个女人

you're going to need to stop Instagramming pictures

你就不能再在网上发你和你的狗

of you and your dog wearing matching sweaters.

穿情侣毛衣的照片

Fine if that's what it takes to show you that I'm serious.

行为了让你看到我的诚意我同意

Uh quick question.

问一下

Do you mean just Instagram or all my social...

你是单指照片分享网还是所有社交网...

All of them

全部的

Okay deal.

好说定了

All right. Let me ask you a question.

好那我问你一个问题

What do you think of this woman

你觉得这个女孩怎么样

Oh. Oh my God she's beautiful.

我的天好漂亮

Is that who you're going to set me up with

这是你要给我介绍的对象吗

No That's who I'm dating.

不这是我在泡的妞

But maybe she has an older sister.

但也许她有姐姐

So we put a little picture of me

所以我们在里面放了我的照片

and a little picture of Sheldon in it.

还有谢尔顿的照片

In in the locket

放进吊坠里

Yes.

是的

That was in a lost and found box

之前是在失物招领箱里的吊坠

Exactly.

没错

Where we hid it

我们把它藏在那里

So really you gave us three amazing gifts.

真的你们送了我们三件超棒的礼物

You gave the locket the adventure

你们送了吊坠精彩冒险

and the realization that Amy and I can do anything

并且让艾米和我发现只要我俩合作

as long as we work together.

便无所不能

We wrote you a special thank you note.

我们给你们写了张特别的感谢卡

Are those words

这些是文字吗

No.

不是

It's a secret code that you two get to figure out together.

这是要你俩一起破译的密码

Hint it's based on Sanskrit

提示这是以梵文为基础的

but not the Sanskrit you're thinking of.

但不是你们以为的那种梵文

And best of all you can't use the Internet to cheat.

最精彩的在于你们不能作弊上网查

Because we locked you out of your Wi Fi

因为我们锁住了你们的无线网

and the answer to this is your new password.

而答案就是新密码

I'm no longer happy.

我不开心了

Hey guys. Great news.

各位好消息

I'm getting married.

我要结婚了

What No.

-什么 -不

Well I I haven't met her yet

我还没见过她

but her name is Anu.

她叫安努

My father says she comes from a good family.

我父亲说她出身良好家庭

She's in her 30s.

30多岁

She works in hospitality management.

她做酒店管理工作

So as long as I can get through six to ten dates

只要我能挺过六到十次约会

without revealing my true self...

不暴露我的真面目

...this is happening.

我就真能结婚了

I know just what we're giving them for a wedding gift.

我知道我们要送什么结婚礼物了

Oh my God.

我的天

Yeah.

是的

I wanted to look my best for our date

我希望在约会时展现自己最好的一面

and I made a series of bad decisions...

于是我做了一系列悲催的决定

...one of which is hidden by my pants.

其中一个悲催决定被我裤子遮住了

Do you still want to go out with me

你还想和我约会吗

Absolutely. Hey maybe we can go find Nemo together.

当然也许我们可以一起去找尼莫

《海底总动员》中的橙色小丑鱼

That's a good one.

这个哏不错

Do your 63 other crayon friends know you're out

另外63支蜡笔朋友知道你出来了吗

Are you just gonna make fun of me all night

你会取笑我一整晚吗

Probably. Great.

-应该吧 -很好

So what are we thinking Chinese

想吃什么中国菜吗

Yeah I'm in the mood for orange chicken.

好啊我有点想吃香橙鸡

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