生活大爆炸-S09E15_生活大爆炸

S01

Hey gentlemen. Hello.

-各位好啊 -好

If any of you are looking for something to do on Valentine's Day

如果你们有人还在想情人节要做什么

Amy and I'll be streaming our first ever

我跟艾米将首次在网上直播

live episode of Fun With Flags.

我们的《有趣的旗帜》节目

You're welcome to join us as we celebrate the timeless

欢迎你们加入我们一起来庆祝

love affair between wind and flapping fabric.

风与飘扬布料那永恒的爱恋

Penny and I have dinner reservations that night

我跟佩妮那天晚上定好餐厅吃饭了

but any other time no.

其他任何时间我们也不看

Sorry Bernie and I are breaking in the new hot tub

抱歉我跟妮妮要给新浴缸来个"启用仪式"

if you know what I mean.

懂我说的是啥意思吧

Not a clue. Raj

完全不懂拉杰呢

Spending Valentine's Day with Emily.

跟艾米丽共度情人节

You don't sound very excited about it.

你听起来不是太期待啊

Oh I am I am. I g... I guess

没有啊我挺期待吧

I'm still wondering if Emily and I are right for each other.

可能我还不确定我跟艾米丽到底适不适合

Does this have to do with that girl you had coffee with

这不会跟喝咖啡的那个女生有关吧

You mean the strong sexy angel I can't stop thinking about

你是说那位我魂萦梦牵的身心灵完美女神吗

Who can say

谁知道啊

You've been talking about breaking up with Emily forever.

你念叨着要跟艾米丽分手多久了

Why don't you just do it already

你为什么不赶紧分了得了

Yeah just get it over with.

早死早超生

Well you say it like it's easy.

你们说得好像很简单

Have any one of youever broken up with anyone

你们之中有任何人跟别人分手过吗

No. Not really.

-没 -不太

You know uh once I ordered an Uber by accident.

有一次我不小心叫了车

I just got in and went somewhere.

我只能默默上车随便去了个地方

生

活

大

爆

炸

第九季第十五集

So you really gonna break up with her

你真的要跟她分手吗

Yeah I think so.

我想是的

Do you have any advice

有任何建议吗

Well I have broken up with my fair share of guys.

我这一生甩过无数男子

I mean how many times did I break up with Leonard

你知道我甩过莱纳德几次吗

I stopped counting at four.

第四次之后我就不数了

All right my advice to you is do it at her place

我给你的建议就是去她家提分手

so you can leave when you need to

这样你需要走人时就随时能走

uh tell the truth make it quick

实话实说快刀斩乱麻

and be prepared for tears.

做好会有人喷泪的准备

Oh I'm gonna do a pre cry before I go in there.

我已经打算在进她家前先预哭一场

Really dry myself out.

先把我的眼泪哭干

She meant Emily.

她指的是艾米丽

No I I really didn't.

没真的不是指她

You're seriously breaking up with me

你真的要跟我分手吗

Yeah.

是的

And you thought right before Valentine's Day

然后你觉得在情人节前提分手

was a good time to do it

是好时机吗

You're right let's talk again in a few days.

有道理那我们几天后再谈吧

Hey Claire. Hi. It's it's Rajesh.

克莱儿是我拉杰什

I was I was wondering if you're free for Valentine's Day

不知道你情人节那天有没有空

Sorry I just got back with my boyfriend.

抱歉我刚跟我男朋友复合

But I just broke up with my girlfriend.

但我为了你甩了我女朋友呢

Right before Valentine's Day

情人节前甩人家吗

What an ass.

真是个渣男

Please take me back. Our love was meant to be

求你别不要我我们的爱是天作之合

I'm gonna all alone on Valentine's Day.

我情人节要当单身狗了

Well you were right tears.

你说得真没错喷泪

Okay and we are live in 22 minutes.

22分钟后我们就要开始直播了

I'm nervous. I hope people will be around to watch

我好紧张希望观众们能来收看

even though it's Valentine's Day.

哪怕今天是情人节

People who are fans of an Internet show about flags

收看旗帜知识网络节目的观众们吗

Trust me they're around.

放心吧情人节他们绝对有空

Oh and speaking of Valentine's Day I haven't

说到情人节我今晚

forgotten about you tonight.

才不会忘记你呢

What do you mean

你什么意思

Well you've become such an integral part of my life

你现在变成了我生命中与这节目

as well as this show

不可分割的一部分

I felt it only right to include your name in the title.

我觉得应该把你加入到节目名字中

That is so sweet.

你真是太贴心了

So from now on this program will be officially known as

从今天开始这个节目的名称将会是

Dr. Sheldon Cooper

谢尔顿·库珀博士

and Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler

与艾米·菲拉·福勒博士

present Dr. Sheldon' Cooper's Fun With Flags.

倾情奉献谢尔顿·库珀博士的《有趣的旗帜》

Catchy.

朗朗上口啊

I'm gonna check the temp on the tub.

我去检查一下浴缸的温度

Don't make it too hot.

别弄太热

Sorry but "too hot"

抱歉但"太热"辣

is the only temperature I come in.

是本美男唯一的温度

Look at that

看看

you shaved it all.

光溜溜的青龙

You're welcome.

不用谢

Um question this is my first hot tub

提问这是我首次泡按摩浴缸

is it supposed to come with a rat flopping around in it

里面有耗子漂浮着是正常的吗

Ew really Get it out.

真的吗快弄走

How

怎么弄

Uh... wish we had a skimmer.

我们有个漏勺就好了

Uh you turn off the jets

你把按摩喷头关掉

I'll get a strainer from the kitchen.

我去厨房拿滤网

I don't know how to turn off the jets.

我不知道怎么关掉喷头

Good I don't know where we keep the strainer.

很好我也不知道你滤网收哪

Excuse me.

借过

Uh bad news.

有坏消息

The maitre d' said it's gonna be at least an hour.

领班说至少还得等一小时

An hour What That's crazy. We have a reservation.

一小时别闹了我们明明订了位

I know. So what did you say

-对啊 -那你怎么说的

Thanks sorry to bother you.

谢谢抱歉打扰了

But I said it like a badass.

我用恶狠狠的语气说的

All right well can't you like

你就不能比如...

slip him some money or something

塞点钱贿赂他之类的吗

Really I've never done that before. Does it work

真的吗我没这么做过真能行吗

Do people like money is that what you're asking

你是在问我"人们喜不喜欢钱"吗

A... A lot of attitude from the woman

某个知识量小到以为

who thought MC squared was a rapper.

mc2是饶舌歌手名的人脾气倒是挺大啊

Now is that a smart thing to say on a holiday

大过节的你这么说明智吗

that's basically national sex night

今晚基本算是全国操操夜

I'm sorry. You're pretty I'm stupid.

对不起你很漂亮我是白痴

Hello.

你好

Just checked again for Hofstadter.

麻烦再看看到霍夫斯塔德了没

Still gonna be an hour

还要等一小时吗

I'm afraid so.

恐怕是的

Okay. Thanks.

好的谢谢

I think you may have dropped this

这可能是你掉的吧

Did anybody lose a 20

谁丢了一张20块

I did.

我

Oh I took care of it.

我都处理好了

Okay we are live

马上开始直播

5 4 3

in five, four, three...

Oh wait. Oh shoot I already pushed the button.

等等糟糕我已经按下按钮了

Never mind we're live.

没关系直播已开始

Uh hello

大家好

and welcome to a special live edition

欢迎收看直播特别版

of Dr. Sheldon Cooper...

谢尔顿·库珀博士

and Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler present...

与艾米·菲拉·福勒博士出品的

Dr. Sheldon Cooper's Fun With Flags.

谢尔顿博士的《有趣的旗帜》

Consider tonight's episode

请将今晚这一集

a Valentine's Day gift for you our viewers.

当作送给你们的情人节礼物吧观众们

It's also my gift to you.

同时也是我送你的礼物

That was clear right

这够明显了对吧

'Cause you're not getting anything else.

因为你不会得到别的礼物了

Since we're live

鉴于我们是在直播

you'll finally be able to reach out to us

你们终于可以即时联系到我们

with your flag thoughts and flag questions.

提出你们的旗思旗问

Allow us to answer a few quick ones that we get all the time.

我们先快速回答几个常有人问的问题

Uh uh yes I really am a doctor.

是的我真的是一名博士

Uh yes she really is my girlfriend.

是的她真的是我的女朋友

No I just blink a lot

不是我只是习惯老眨眼

it's not Morse code for "Rescue me."

并不是在打摩斯密码求救

Oh uh ok...

好的

Uh here's our first call.

有观众打进第一通电话

Hello and welcome to Fun With Flags.

你好欢迎来到《有趣的旗帜》

What's your question

你有什么问题吗

What is wrong with me

我脑子是哪里有病

Why am I so self destructive

为什么我总是自我毁灭

Rajesh

拉杰什

Yes.

是我

Whenever things are going well I always find a way to ruin it.

每当事情一帆风顺时我总有方法毁掉它

You two look happy how do you do it

你俩看起来很幸福是怎么做到的

I I think it starts with good communication.

我觉得是始于良好的沟通

Yeah wait that's not a flag question.

是啊等等这问题跟旗帜无关

Next caller.

下一位

I hope you don't think I'm just saying this

我希望你不会认为我这么说

because it's Valentine's Day but...

是因为今天是情人节但...

I love you so much.

我真的好爱你

I'm gonna put this down your robe.

我要把这玩意扔进你浴袍里

It's not moving but I think it's still alive.

它不动了但我觉得它还活着

Well should we put it back in there a few minutes

那该把它扔回去多泡几分钟吗

No.

不必

No and it's not a rat it's a rabbit.

这不是老鼠是只兔子

We need to save it.

我们得救救它

Well how do we do that

我们该怎么做

Um I don't know look it up on your phone.

我不知道你用手机查查

I I'm gonna wrap it in a towel.

我拿毛巾包着它

"Taking care of injured rabbit."

"照顾受伤的兔子"

Okay.

有了

Make sure it's comfortable and warm.

确保它既舒服又暖和

Well it was just in a hot tub. I'm gonna say "Check."

它刚泡在热水浴缸里这条符合

Anything else

还有别的吗

To make sure it's not dehydrated

确保它没有脱水

feed him an electrolyte solution.

喂他一勺电解质溶液

If it's not responding

如果没有反应

use a warm cloth to wash its face and genitals.

用一块暖布帮他擦洗脸和生殖器

Yeah.

好耶

This is ridiculous.

这真是太过分了

You know I'm gonna go talk to the maitre d.

我要去找那个领班谈谈

What are you gonna say

你要说什么

I don't know. I'm... I'm gonna flirt with him.

我不知道我去嗲他几下吧

I don't know if I'm comfortable with that.

我不知道我是否能接受这事

I'm still sleeping with you tonight.

我今晚还是跟你"睡"啊

See if you can get a table by the window.

你看看能不能弄到靠窗的桌子

Hi there. What's your name

你好你叫什么

Glen. Oh boy

-格伦 -天啊

it is crazy in here tonight huh Glen

今晚这里人真是超多啊格伦

Well you know Valentine's Day. Yes.

-情人节嘛你懂的 -是啊

Bet your girlfriend is super bummed

我猜你女友一定超级郁闷

you had to work tonight.

你今晚得上班

Anyway look we have been waiting a while and I just...

听着我们等了挺长时间了我有点...

With all due respect ma'am

恕我直言女士

there's nothing I can do.

我无能为力

You don't have to call me ma'am.

你用不着叫我"女士"

Okay.

好的

I mean we're basically the same age.

我们应该年纪相仿

Okay.

好的

How old are you

你几岁

I'm 21. How old are you

我21岁你呢

Just shut up Glen.

把嘴闭上格伦

Come on let's get out of here.

走吧我们离开这里

What Why Because I'm young. Let's go.

-为什么 -因为姐年轻走吧

Rajesh it's perfectly normal

拉杰什分手后

to have doubts after breaking up with someone.

产生自我怀疑非常正常

Well you really think so

你真的这么认为吗

Yeah you know what's not normal

是啊你知道什么不正常吗

Blubbering about emotions during a flag show.

在一个旗帜节目里哭诉个人情绪

Unless that emotion is excitement over New Zealand

除非那种情绪是因为新西兰要变更国旗

changing their flag.

喜极而泣

Yeah good luck you crazy Kiwis

祝你们好运哦疯狂的新西兰人

we're rooting for you.

我们全力支持你们

Your friend is hurting.

你的朋友正在伤心呢

No Sheldon's right.

不谢尔顿说得对

Emily did say I always talk about my feelings too much.

艾丽米说过我老对自己的感受喋喋不休

I I suppose that

我想

could be a legitimate concern in a relationship.

这应该算是恋爱中需要注意的一点

Uh perhaps even a a red flag.

甚至可以算作恋爱路上的危险红旗

And speaking of red flags

说到红旗

check out this sexy number from the former Soviet Union.

请看这面来自前苏联的性感红旗

Hubba hubba.

相当地诱人吧

Uh we we have another caller.

又有一位观众打电话来了

Hi. You're on Fun with Flags.

你好这里是《有趣的旗帜》

Hello. I want to talk about how lonely I am too.

你好我也想倾诉下我有多孤独

Kripke Is that you

克里普克是你吗

Yeah I'm just sitting here all by myself

是我我独自一人坐在电脑前

wondering if I'll ever find someone to share my life with.

思考着我这辈子是否还能找到我的爱人

Preferably Asian 18 24 no fatties.

最好是亚洲人 18至24岁不能是胖妞

Please all comments and questions

拜托所有的留言和问题

should be flag related.

都必须和旗帜有关

All right. Is my pole flag related

好啊我裤裆中的"旗杆"算吗

I don't see why not.

当然算啦

He's eating. That's a good sign.

他开始吃东西了这是个好现象

You're gonna have to wait one hour

吃饭以后要等上一个小时

until you can go swimming again.

才能再游泳哦

He's pretty cute. He is.

-他好可爱哦 -的确

Should we... name him

我们应该...给他取名吗

It is Valentine's Day.

今天是情人节[圣华伦丁节]

How about Valentino

就叫华伦天奴怎么样

Nice. A classic rabbit name.

很好很经典的小兔名字

Peter Rabbit Roger Rabbit.

彼得兔罗杰兔

皆为著名的卡通兔子

Valentino Wolowitz Rabbit.

华伦天奴·沃罗威茨兔

Oh look at all that chest hair and overbite.

看看你茂密的胸毛和小龅牙

Of course you're a Wolowitz.

完全就是沃罗威茨家族的一员呀

Son of a bitch He bit me

我勒个去他咬了我

Are you okay

你没事吧

No I'm not okay

当然有事了

Wild rabbits can have rabies

野兔可能携带狂犬病呢

Oh. Well why did you put your finger near its mouth

谁叫你把手指放在他的嘴边

Poor judgment obviously.

明显是因为我犯傻嘛

He's so little. I'm sure it's fine.

他这么小我想应该没事的

How can it be fine I just got attacked

怎么可能没事我刚刚被一只

by a clearly anti Semitic wild animal.

具有反犹太倾向的野生动物袭击了

It's not what we planned

虽然和我们原计划不一样

but this isn't so bad right

但这样也不坏对吧

It is freaking amazing.

这实在是太赞了

Well glad you're feeling better.

很高兴看你心情好一点了

I was just hungry and cranky

我刚才是又饿又憋气

and I've never been called "Ma'am" before.

我从来没被人叫过"女士"呢

Is that a big deal Kind of.

-这件事很严重吗 -算严重吧

When was the first time someone called you "Sir"

你第一次被叫作"先生"是什么时候

Sixth grade

小学六年级

but I wore a sport coat and carried a briefcase so...

当时我穿着休闲西装提着公文包所以...

Can you believe when I met you I was 22

你能相信我遇见你时才22岁吗

I mean it's crazy

真是时光匆匆啊

Where did all that time go

时间都去哪儿了

Mm you watched The Bachelor a lot.

都被你用来看《单身汉》相亲节目了

Yeah go ahead and make jokes

你想开玩笑就开吧

but your thirties are almost over.

但你的三十岁也马上就要过完了

No they're not.

才怪

You're closer to 40 than you are 30.

比起30岁来你更接近40岁了

You married an old man.

你嫁给了一个老头子

Tell you what. Let's do something fun tonight.

这样吧今晚我们来找点乐子

Won't make us any younger.

这又不会让我们变年轻

Well maybe not but some day we actually will be old

也许不会但等我们真正老去的那天

and we'll look back on this night

我们回想到今晚

and remember what a good time we had.

仍然会怀念起今夜的好时光

Okay like what

比如什么

I know. Food fight

我想到了食物大战

I'll keep thinking.

我再继续想吧

Look I know you both feel bad about being alone

我知道你俩为单身而难过

but sometimes the best thing you can do

但有时最好的解决办法

is take a little time for yourself

就是给自己一点时间

especially when you just got out of a relationship.

尤其是当你刚刚结束一段关系的时候

Speaking of ending relationships

说到结束关系

when British Honduras became Belize

当英属洪都拉斯改名为伯利兹时

they designed a new flag with a tree on it

他们设计了一面画着树的国旗

and I would like to hang myself from that tree.

现在我想在那棵树上吊死来结束生命

But Amy when you and Sheldon split up

可是艾米当你和谢尔顿分手时

didn't you start dating someone right away

你不是立刻就和其他人约会了吗

Well I... I wouldn't say right away.

我不觉得那算是立刻

And actually it was three different men.

而且实际上她约会了3个人

Three different men

3个人吗

Damn girl way to give the milk away

我去妹子太会主动给猪送白菜了吧

Oh looks like we just lost Kripke.

克里普克好像断线了

Actually I'm still here.

没有我还在线上

Now Yup.

-现在呢 -还在

Now Yup

-现在呢 -还在

Now

现在呢

Oh looks like we just lost Kripke.

克里普克好像断线了

Before Emily I was alone for so long.

在艾米丽之前我曾经单身了好长时间

I just... I don't know if I can do that again.

我不知道是否还能再挺过单身的日子

Well you know here is something that might cheer you up.

有件事可能会让你开心一点

The flag of the Isle of Man

英属曼岛的国旗

is nothing but three legs

上面是共穿一条奇怪内裤的

sharing a weird pair of underpants so...

三条大光腿所以...

you think you got problems.

你觉得只有你有大问题吗

I have an idea.

我有个主意

Maybe someone in our audience

也许咱们观众中的某人

would be interested in meeting Rajesh.

可能会有兴趣和拉杰什见面

Ladies I can attest that he is a kind

姑娘们我可以证明他是一个善良

handsome intelligent...

帅气聪明

Rich parents Don't forget rich parents

富二代别忘了说我是富二代

...spoiled astrophysicist who not only...

被宠坏了的天体物理学家不仅...

Well that was quick.

行动够快的

Hi. You're on Fun with Flags.

你好这里是《有趣的旗帜》

Hey I think I got cut off.

喂我刚刚好像断线了

Hello Kripke.

你好克里普克

I have a flag question.

我有一个旗帜问题

How many men did you have sex with

你睡过几个男人

Let's see. What's young and fun

找找什么东西年轻有趣

Uh we could go dancing.

我们可以去跳舞

Are you actually gonna dance

你是真准备下舞池跳吗

Of course. Yeah.

当然了对啊

No one wants to see that.

就别害别人得自戳双目了

Hey how about skinny dipping at the beach

去海边裸泳如何

No I don't need any fish nibbling my business.

不去我经不起另一种"鱼水之欢"了

Oh there's a screening of Moulin Rouge

有《红磨坊》演出

I heard the crowd sings along and stuff.

听说观众和演员都一起唱

That sounds fun. When's it start

好像挺有意思的几点开始

Midnight.

午夜

Midnight. Really

午夜不是吧

You know what Let's do it.

管它呢我们去吧

Okay great

好的太棒了

Oh wait. Uh it's sold out.

等等票卖光了

Oh thank God. Yes

-谢天谢地 -太棒了

It says rabies in rabbits is highly unlikely.

上面说兔子传播狂犬病的几率很小

Oh terrific. It's not terrific.

-太好了 -一点都不好

Lots of highly unlikely things happen.

小概率的事发生得还少吗

You saw what's under this robe and you still married me.

你见过这浴袍下的胴体居然还嫁给我

If you're really worried we'll take him to the vet

你要是真的担心就带它去看兽医

and have him tested. Good. Thank you.

-让兽医检测一下 -好的谢谢

Oh okay there is a test

好找到个测试

All they have to do is...

你只需要...

cut off his head and check his brain.

劈开它的头检查大脑

Oh cut off his head

劈开它的头

That's where his little nose is.

那小鼻子就在头上呢

He's not showing any symptoms.

它没有任何狂犬症状

I guess I'll just go to the emergency room to be safe.

我还是去自己急诊室确认一下吧

Howie this is just your hypochondria.

华仔这只是你的臆想病犯了

No when I sat on the mute button

不是我坐到静音键上

and thought I'd gone deaf that was my hypochondria.

以为自己聋了那才叫臆想病

We'll find another time to tell him I'm pregnant.

我们另找个时间告诉他我怀孕了吧

外国会用"the rabbit died[兔子死掉]"来指女人怀孕

I mean this is the first time I've ever broken up with someone.

这是我第一次跟人分手

I just... I didn't realize it was gonna hurt this much.

没有想到会如此心痛

It really can.

是这样的

All right.

行了

Nothing about this is fun.

这一点都不有趣

No one wants to talk about flags

没人想聊旗帜

and I haven't spoken in over ten minutes

而我已经十分钟插不上话了

so enjoy your new show Internet.

所以互联网请欣赏新节目

Dr. Amy Farrah Flower Present... With.

由艾米·菲拉·福勒博士出品的《的》

I'm sorry for bothering you.

抱歉打扰到你们了

I'll hang up now.

我马上挂

No hold on Rajesh.

不要等等拉杰什

You know you're not being very sympathetic.

你这样非常没有同情心

You know firsthand that breakups are hard.

分手的痛楚你最清楚不过了

Fine.

好吧

If you insist on making me a part of this

如果你坚持让我参与的话

yes I knowledge how painful they can be.

是的我了解这有多痛苦

However pain has an evolutionary purpose.

尽管如此这种痛苦有进化的作用

It provides information from the environment

这让我们获得外部提供的信息

that uh behavior isn't good for us.

这种行为对我们有负面影响

Like when I fell in love with that stripper

比如我爱上了那个脱衣舞女

and bought her a Prius.

给她买了一辆丰田普锐斯

I'm just gonna push all the buttons.

我要把所有键都按一遍

Raj now I'm sorry you're suffering.

拉杰我很遗憾你觉得痛苦

When Amy and I were broken up I also suffered.

当初我和艾米分手时我也很痛苦

And this may sound surprising

说起来也许你不信

but I'm grateful for having gone through it.

但我很感激有过这段磨难

Really

真的吗

Yes.

是的

I believe our relationship now is stronger than ever.

我相信我们现在的感情前所未有的牢固

So do I.

我也是

When when we were apart

在我们分手期间

I learned how important you are to me.

我了解到你对我有多重要

And I realize that when two people are in love

也意识到当两个人相爱

sometimes they...

有时候他们...

Happy Valentine's Day

情人节快乐

We are young and fun

我们年轻又有趣

I stand corrected.

我认错

Fun.

有趣

Congratulations on a successful live show.

恭喜直播节目成功

And a lovely Valentine's Day.

还有美好的情人节

Cleaning up is not young and fun.

打扫清洁真是不年轻也不有趣

It can be. Confetti fight

怎么不是彩花大战

Maybe you should take a break.

你去歇会吧

I got this.

我来就好

Did you know the singular of confetti is "confetto"

你知道彩花的单数是彩片吗

Interesting and when would you use the singular

有意思但哪时会需要用单数表示

I'm glad you asked.

问得好

Amy you have a confetto in your nose.

艾米你鼻子里有一张彩片

不不不另一边

There you go.

这就对了

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