生活大爆炸-S02E01_生活大爆炸

S01

Knight to queen's bishop five.

马吃掉后的象

Oh very nice. what's leonard going to do this

高招莱纳德要如何应对

Does he give up the pawn or does he give up the position

是舍弃卒还是改换布局呢

Let's find out.

马上揭晓

Leonard ready

莱纳德准备好了吗

Ready. Go.

-好了 -开始

Damn it. I slipped.

该死滑了一下

Too bad.

真可惜

you know the rules of secret agent laser obstacle chess.

但你清楚激光障碍特工象棋的规则

Leonard died again sheldon. you're up.

莱纳德又死了谢尔顿你上吧

Despite my deep love of chess lasers and aerosol disinfectant

虽然我深爱象棋激光和空气消毒剂

I must forfeit.

但我必须放弃

Why

为什么

Because it's almost 11 00. so

-因为快到11点了 -那又怎样

So penny has a "don't knock or I punch you in the throat" rule.

佩妮给我立了"11点前敲门就往喉咙揍一拳"规则

Hey you know what'd be a great idea

这个主意好不好

We get some girls over here and play laser optical strip chess.

我们找些女生来玩激光视觉脱衣象棋

Believe me howard any girl who would be willing to play that

相信我霍华德肯玩象棋的女生

You don't want to see naked.

你不会想看她们的裸体

You underestimate me.

你太低估我了

Penny. penny.

佩妮佩妮

Penny.

佩妮

Hey sheldon.

好啊谢尔顿

It's 11 00 a.m.

上午11点到了

I know. you're safe.

我知道你安全了

This package came while you were at work

包裹送到时你在上班

oh great my rhinestones.Thank you.

太好了我订的莱茵石谢谢

Excuse me. what

-等等 -怎么了

You have to sign this.

你要签收

What is it

这是什么

When I signed for the package

我签收了包裹

I was deputized by the united parcel service

我就代表邮递公司

And entrusted with its final delivery.

并受委托最终送达

I now need you to acknowledge receipt of the package

我现在要你确认收到包裹

So that i'm fully indemnified and no longer liable.

我才算完整履行法律义务

Sheldon it's just a box of rhinestones.

谢尔顿只不过是一盒莱茵石而已

Well the contents are irrelevant.

这跟物品无关

A legal bailment has been created.

法定委托关系已经形成

Is that mean nothing to you

你一点都不重视吗

It means nothing to anybody.

没有人会重视这个

Come here let me show you what I'm doing.

过来给你看看我做的东西

"bailment" describes a relationship in common law

‘委托’在普通法里的解释是

where a physical possession of personal property

当个人的私有财产

or "chattels "

或者说动产

is transferred from one person the bailor

从委托人一方转移到

To another person the bailee...

受托人一方

Yeah yeah yeah. look look look

对对对快看

I started a business.

我做起了一门生意

Obviously not a cleaning business.

显然不是干净的生意

No I'm making flower barrettes. see

不是我在做花花发夹看

I call them penny blossoms.

我起了个名字叫佩妮花花

I made one for myself

我给自己做了一个

then all the girls at work wanted one.

接着店里的女生也想要

Then I showed some to this lady who runs a shop in old town.

然后我拿给在旧城镇开店的老板娘看

She sells cards and homemade jewels

她卖一些卡和自制首饰

She said she wanted to sell them. I said "okay."

她说想卖呢我答应了

And in one week i made a $156.

一周里我赚了156美刀

Good for you Sign here.

真好签收吧

Sheldon don't you get it

谢尔顿你没听懂吗

If this takes off

如果生意做下去

I won't have to be a waitss anymore.

我就不用当服务员了

But then who will bring me my cheeseburger on tuesday nights

那周二晚上谁给我带干酪汉堡

Another waitress.

其他服务员呗

What's her name

她叫什么名字

I don't know.

我怎么知道

And you're going to let her handle my food

那你还放心让她负责我的食物

Nancy. her name is nancy.

南希她叫南希

I think you're just making that up.

你瞎编的名字吧

Sheldon I'm sorry about your hamburger okay

谢尔顿抱歉不能给你带牛肉汉堡了

I just don't want to be a waitress for the rest of my life.

我不想一辈子就做个服务员

Cheeseburger. I get a cheeseburger.

干酪汉堡我要的是干酪汉堡

Fine cheeseburger.

行干酪汉堡

Maybe I'd be better off with nancy.

说不定让南希负责更好

So what do you think

你觉得怎么样

I mean this could be a business right

这门生意能做对吧

How many of these can you make a day

你一天能做几个

About 20.

大概20个

And how much profit do you make per...Penny blossom

每个...佩妮花花能赚多少

I don't know like 50 cents. I'm not sure.

不知道 50美分吧不确定

Of course you're not. all right...

你当然确定不了好吧

Ten dollars a day times five days a week

1天10美刀乘以1周5天

Times 52 weeks a year is $2 600.

乘以1年52周等于2600美刀

That's all

就这么多

Before taxes.

只是税前

I don't have to pay taxes on this stuff.

我又不用为这些交税

I believe the internal revenue service would strongly disagree.

我相信国税局会强烈反对

But if you took advantage of modern marketing techniques

但是如果你利用现代营销技巧

And you optimized your manufacturing process

优化生产过程

You might be able to make this a viable business.

或者能做好这门生意

And you know about that stuff

你知道怎么做吗

Penny...

佩妮

I'm a physicist.

我可是物理学家

I have a working knowlge of the

拥有整个宇宙

Entire universe and everything it contains.

及其所有事物的相关知识

Who's radiohead

电台司令[乐队名]是谁

囧囧囧囧囧

I have a working knowledge of the important things in the universe.

我有宇宙重要事物的相关知识

Good luck.

祝你好运

Sheldon hold on.

谢尔顿等等

Could you maybe show me how to make more money with this.

你能教我怎样才能赚多点钱吗

Of course I could

我当然有能力教你

Sheldon wait

谢尔顿等等

Will you

你会教我吗

Just to be clear here you're asking for my assistance.

首先声明你要我协助你

Yes.

是的

And you understand that will involve me telling you what to do

你要明白这牵扯到给你解释怎么做

I understand.

我明白

And you're not allowed to be sarcastic or snide to me while I'm doing so.

而你不准对我明嘲暗讽

Okay.

好吧

Good.

很好

Let's begin with the premise that

我们的首要前提是

Everything you've done up to this point is wrong.

你之前所做的全都不对

Oh Imagine that.

哇哦我也猜到了

Sarcasm. good bye. No sorry wait. Please come back.

-讽刺我拜拜 -不是对不起回来

There. done.

完工

All right.

好

12 minutes and 17 seconds. oh

-用了12分17秒 -噢!

Pretty good right

还不错吧?

Penny ossoms per hour.

计算佩妮花花一小时的产量

Based on your wholesale selling price

再算上批量购买的材料费用

You'll effectively be paying yourself...

你一天实际上只能赚...

$5.19 a day.

5.19美元

"a day"

一天?

There are children in a sneaker factory in indonia who outearn you.

连印度尼西亚的球鞋场童工都赚得比你多

That just can't be right.

这不可能

You're questioning my math no sorry.

-你质疑我的数学能力? -不抱歉

Want me to show my work

想见识下我的数学大作吗?

Oh god no.

天啊千万别

Just please tell me what to do about it.

告诉我该怎么做就好

All right.

好吧

Are you familiar with the development

你知道奥诺雷·布兰在1778年开发的

in 1778 used interchangeable parts

可互换零件吗 ?

The assembly line of course.

好吧就是生产流水线

Okay you know what if I'm not allowed to be snide

听着既然我不讥讽你

You're not allowed to be condescending.

你也不准显摆

Sthat wasn't a part of our original agreement

原始协议内不包含这条

And I don't agree to it now.

所以我不同意

L right fine.

好吧算了

How are we supposed to set up machines and conveyor belts in my apartment

我们怎么在公寓里架机器和传送带?

You're thinking of the moving assembly line

你那是指流动生产线

An understandable but not excusable mistake. no.

可以理解但依然错得不可原谅

The moving assembly line that was introduced by henry ford in 1908.

流动生产线是在1908年由亨利·福特发明的

That innovation is what made possible our modern consumer

这项创新通过低成本的生产商品

Culture by enabling a low unit cost for manufactured goods.

造就了现代消费文化

I guess that isn' one of the topics discussed on your radiohead.

你说的那个电台司令肯定不知道这个东西吧

Let's go. we're going to miss the coming attractions.

来吧可别错过好戏

What's the matter

怎么了?

I think I bruised a testicle capturing that last pawn.

我在吃掉最后一个卒时扭伤了我的蛋蛋

Give me some timeon ato blow the man down

请稍等片刻我便将他放倒!

I'm a deepwatesailor just come fromong Kong

我是香港的深海水兵初来乍到

Give me way hey blow the man down

让开让开我来把他放倒

If you give me some whiskey

给我些威士忌

I'll sing you a song

听我把歌儿为你唱

Give me some time to blow the man down.

请稍等片刻我便将他放倒!

Hello

喂

Hello. Hello.

-好啊 -好啊

Come quickly lay aft

船尾甲板上的同胞

To the break of the poop

离开岗哨快快来吧

To me way hey blow the man down

帮我把他放倒!

Or I'll help you along with the toe of my boot

不然我会用靴子将你踢倒

Give me some me to blow the man down.

请稍等片刻我便将他放倒!

W W Wait what's going on

等下怎么回事?

I assume you're referring to the sea chanty.

你是指水手之歌吗?

It's a rhythmic work song

这是一首很有节奏的工作歌

designedo increase productivity.

能够提高产量

Yeah it's crazy but it totally works.

没错虽然很疯狂但的确很有效

Look we made is Penny Blossom

看吧我们不用3分钟

in under three minutes.

就完成了一个佩妮花花

Terrific but that kind of raises more questions than it answers.

很赞但似乎我更加一头雾水了

Penny's making hair accessories.

佩妮在做头饰

I'm helping her optimize her manufacturing process.

我的工作是最优化生产过程

Alright break's over.

好了休息时间结束

Pay attention to orders now you one and all...

听好命令你们全体为一...

Hold on. What are you using as a bonding agent

等等你用的什么黏合剂?

Hot glue.

热熔胶

You're kidding.

不会吧

Any of the cnoacrylates would do a better job.

任何快干胶都比它好

It won't work the flower'too porous.

不管用这花容易渗水

What if we infused the bottom layer

我们把矽胶原液注进底层

with silicone RTV to provide a better mounting surface

这样就有了一个更牢固的底座

Intriguing.

好主意

Good question.

问得好

Wh are your marketing and distribution channels

你有什么市场营销渠道吗?

Well ere are the waitresses at my work

呃和我一起工作的女招待

and this cute little shop in Old Town...

在旧城镇里有一间小巧可爱的商店...

Hush hush hush hush hush virtually non existent.

停停停没有什么实体店存在

I'm thinking that we set her up

我在考虑我们首先为她

with a hosted turnkey e commerce system to start.

建立一个电子商务监控系统

Why not eliminate the middle man

还要什么中介系统呢

We could install a small server farm

我们可以装一个小服务器群

with a static IP in her bedroom.

IP地址直接是她卧室!

She'd need some kind of industrial cooling system.

那她就需要一些工业制冷系统了

Of course but before we set up

当然了不过慢着

a marketing andistribution infrastructure

我们建立市场营销基础设施之前

we should finish optimizing the manufacturing process.

必须先完善生产过程

To start with she has a terrible problem

首先现在有个严重问题

with moisture induced glitter clump.

闪粉因为受潮而凝固成块了

Yeah it's a bitch.

是啊真是难伺候

Uh I've seen this before.

这我以前见过

Where

在哪儿?

It's a common stripper problem.

脱衣舞娘常遇到的问题

They dance they swe they clump.

她们一跳舞一流汗就凝固了嘛

Are you thinking about adding

你是不是在考虑

a desiccant ke calcium sulfate

加点硫酸钙进去用作干燥剂呢?

Actually I'm thinking about this one stripper named Vega.

其实我在想一个叫薇迦的脱衣舞娘

But re calcium sulfate could work.

当然啦可以用硫酸钙

Let's think out the box for a moment.

让我们再想想别的

How about a molecular sieve

用分子筛怎么样

I've got a spaghetti strainer in the kitchen.

我厨房里有个意面筛子

Hey we could liberate some

我们可以从化学实验室

micro porous charcoal from the chem lab.

拿些微孔活性炭出来

Oh great.Raj why don't you and Howard go get the charcoal

很好拉杰你和霍华德去拿活性炭

Leonard why don't you start working on preliminary web site designs.

莱纳德你去给网站做个初步设计

I'll make some space in our apartment

我去我们公寓里腾些地方出来

so we can move the manufacturing process.

这样我们可以展开生产过程

Well what's wrong with my apartment

我的公寓哪里不好了?

It's not my apartment.

这里不是我的公寓

Wait wait what am I going to do

等等我该干什么

Uh hey it's your business.

呃这是你的生意

Do whatever you want

做你想做的任何事

Okay cool.

好真不错

I'm gonna take a nap.

我要睡一觉

I'm still twinking things a little bit

我还在修改中

but this will give you the general idea of the Web site.

但能给你们看网站的大致样子了

So what do you guys think

你们觉得怎么样

Uh pretty much any way I say that

呃不管我用何种方式说出来

is going to hurt his feelings.

都会伤到他的感情的

Okay what's wrong with it

有什么问题吗

What's wrong with it

有什么问题

Not you. I wasn't asking you.

不是你我没在问你

Penny

佩妮

Uh well it's a little juvenile.

呃有一点点幼稚

I mean it kind of looks like the MySpace page

看着像一个13岁女孩的

of a 13 year old girl.

个人主页

No it doesn't.

不像啊

Please. Dateline could use it to attract predators.

拜托约会热线都可以拿这个来吸引色狼了

Penny this is your enterprise

佩妮这是你的公司

so it's ultimately your decision

所以最终决议权在于你

but based on the quality of his work

但基于他工作的质量

I'd strongly recommend that we let Leonard go.

我强烈建议开除莱纳德

You want to fire me

你想开除我?

What I want is irrelevant. This is Penny's decision.

我怎么想都没有关系这是佩妮的决定

Penny

佩妮?

Excuse me but if I did such a bad job

等等既然我做得那么糟

then why do we already have orders

那为什么已经有人下订单了

We do

真的吗

Uh huh. Look.

看

Mrs. Fiona Fondell from Huntsville Alabama has ordered two.

阿拉巴马亨斯维尔的菲奥娜·冯戴尔太太要两个

No kidding. Two Uh huh

没开玩笑吧两个?

Look at the comments.

看那些评论

Thank you Penny Blossoms. These will be perfect to cover my bald spot."

谢谢佩妮花花这些为我遮羞再好不过了

that is so sweet.

真感动

Camouflaging bald spots.

当作遮羞的用途

That's primarily a male concern.

这能够吸引男士目光

Perhaps could expand our market.

也许我们可以扩大市场

How are flower barrettes going to appeal to men

花花发卡怎么能吸引男人呢

We add Bluetooth

我们加上蓝牙!

Brilliant. Men love Bluetooth.

太聪明了男人喜欢蓝牙

Wait a minute wait a minute

等等等等

you want to make a hair barrette with Bluetooth

你想做一个装有蓝牙的发卡?

Penny everything is better with Bluetooth.

佩妮任何东西加上了蓝牙都会好很多

Holy crap.

噢天啊

Someone just ordered a thousand Penny Blossoms.

有人刚订了一千个佩妮花花

Get out

怎么可能

Who needs a thousand sparkly flower barrettes

谁会需要一千个带莱茵石的

with rhinestones

花花发卡

"The Fifth Annual East Rutherford New Jersey

第五届新泽西州东卢瑟福德

Gay Lesbian Bisexual and Transgender Alliance Luau."

男同女同双性恋者和变性人联盟宴会

Oh another market to expand

噢又一个可以开拓的市场

To balding gay men.

裸体基佬

And I'll bet lesbians love Bluetooth.

我打赌女同们喜欢蓝牙

We should get to work.

我们该开始工作了

Wait wait why does it say "one day rush"

等等为什么他要一天内加急交货

Since when do we offer a one day rush

我们什么时候提供加急服务了

Amazon offers one day rush.

亚马逊购书网提供加急服务的

Yeah but they don't have to glue the books together.

但他们又不需要把书黏在一起

How the hell are we going to make

我们怎么才能在一天内

a thousand Penny Blossoms in one day

做出一千个佩妮花花呢

Don't yell at me.

别对我吼啊

I'm not manufacturing. I'm just Web design.

我又不是负责生产的我只负责网页设计

Okay well I'm gonna have to call and cancel the order.

好吧我要去打电话取消订单

Excuse me

什么

but was this not your goal

这难道不正是你的目标吗

Financial independence

通过企业的独特性

through entrepreneurial brilliance and innovation

和创新性来达到经济独立的目的

My brilliance and innovation of course but still.

是我的独特性和创新性但仍是你的目标

I just don't see how we can pull this off.

我只是不知道我们怎么才能完成这活

That right there that equivotion and self doubt

就是这种支吾的语气和自我怀疑

that is not the American spirit.

这可不是美国精神

Did Davy Crockett quit at the Alamo

戴维·克罗基特[拓荒时代英雄]放弃阿拉莫了吗

Did Jim Bowie

吉姆·鲍伊[美国英雄人物]放弃了吗

They didn't quit.They were massacred...

他们是没放弃他们被宰了

by like a gazillion angry Mexicans.

被无数愤怒的墨西哥人宰了

Let me put it this way.

这么说吧

Your gross receipts on this one order

你这单的毛收入

will be over $3 000 for one night's work.

将会超过3000美金只要工作一晚

You guys get started.

大家开工

What are you doing

你在干嘛

Going online to buy shoes

上网买鞋子

She'll be coming round the mountain when she comes When she comes

她来了以后会来山里转转来转转

She'll be coming round the mountain when she comes

她来了以后会来山里转转来转转

When she comes

来转转

She'll be coming round the mountain

她来了以后会来山里转转

She'll be coming round the mountain...

她来了以后会来山里转转

You know if I wand to spend my Saturday nights doing this

如果我想周六晚上干这个

I could have stayed in India.

我大可留在印度

Oh stop with the fake third world crap.

别来你那套第三世界的假把戏

Your father's a gynecologist.

你父亲是妇产科医生

And you had a use full of servants.

你有一大帮仆人

We only had four servants.

我们才四个仆人

And two of them were children.

还有两个是小孩

How we doing

干得怎么样了

We have 128 assorted Penny Blossoms ready to ship.

还有128组佩妮花花要做

Oh God we're never gonna finish in time.

天哪按时做不完了

When she comes When she comes

来转转来转转

Wait hold.Who made Sheldon the boss anyway

-等下 -是谁让谢尔顿来做主的

I believe I'm hearing some negativity on the factor floor.

我想我听到工厂那边有牢骚

怎么样

Penny the labor force is a living organism

佩妮劳动力是必须

that must be carefully nurtured.

被精心呵护的生命体

Any counterproductive grumbling must be skillfully

任何影响生产力的抱怨

headed off by management. Observe

必须用管理手段扼杀看着

Hey

嘿

Less talk more work

少说话多干活

Nicely done.

做得不错

Thank you.

谢谢

You hear any union talk you let know.

听到什么工会的声音告诉我

Someone's in the kitchen with Dinah...

某人和黛娜在厨房

Someone's in the kitchen I know ow ow ow

我知道某人在厨房

Someone's in the kihen with Dinah...

某人和黛娜在厨房

Sheldon

谢尔顿

Sheldon

谢尔顿

'Cause I sold my soul to the company store.

因为我向矿工商店出卖了灵魂

Honey do you want some coffee

宝贝来点咖啡吗

I don't drink coffee.

不我不喝咖啡

Come on but if you don't stay awake

拜托如果你不能醒着

we'll never finish in time.

我们无法按时完工的

I'm sorry coffee's out of the question.

抱歉咖啡绝对不行

When I moved to California

当我搬到加州时

I promised my mother that I wouldn't start doing drugs.

我向我妈保证我不会嗑药的

Leonard help.

莱纳德帮帮忙

Sheldon we still have 380 of these things to make

谢尔顿还有380个要做

I have complete faith that you will make them.Good night.

我绝对相信你们能完成的晚安

Leonard

莱纳德

But Sheldon without your insight and leadership

谢尔顿没有你的见解和领导

this entire enterprise will surely fail.

整个公司都会垮掉

You're right of course.

你说得太对了

Here this will help.

给你会有用的

Very well

很好

but if this leads to opiates or hallucinogenics

但如果这让我麻醉或致幻

You're going to have to answer to my mother.

你要给我妈有个交代

Look at Planck's Constant.

看看普朗克常数

It could not be less arbitrary.

不能有一点偏差

If it varied slightly life as we know would not exist.Bang

如变了一点我们熟知的生活就不存在了嘭!

Now now let's reconsider the entire argument

现在再看一下整个推论过程

but with entropy reversed and effect peceding cause.

把熵反向因果颠倒

So you are thinking a universe

这时的宇宙

that's not expanding from the center

不是从中心点膨胀

no it is retreating from a from a possibility space. Bang

是在从一个可能的空间中缩退嘭!

This is a space where we are all essentially Alice

在这个世界里我们实际上都是

through the looking glass

镜子里的爱丽丝

standing in front of the Red Queen

站在红发女王前

and we're being offered a cracker to quench our thirst. Bang

口渴了只有饼干来解渴嘭!

Of course in another universe let's call it universe prime

当然在另一个叫元期宇宙的空间里

there's another Sheldon

有另一个谢尔顿

We should let him go to bed. Bang

-我们该让他上床睡觉的 -嘭!

I can't believe we actually did it.

不敢相信我们做到了

1 000 friggin' Penny Blossoms.

一千个该死的佩妮花花

I just want you guys to know

想让你们知道

I am really grateful for your help.

我特别感激你们的帮助

And for ever dollar I make I'm gog to give you 20 cents.

我赚的每块钱分你们20分

That's your entire profit margin.

那是你所有的利润

Oh.Then never mind.

噢那算了

I'll print out the shipping label.

我来打印邮寄标签

What

怎么了

We got an e mail from the East Rutherford New Jersey

有封来自新泽西的东卢瑟福的

Gay Lesbian Bisexual and Transgender liance.

男同女同双性恋变性人联盟的邮件

They want another thousand Penny Blossoms.

他们还要一千个佩妮花花

Really

真的吗

One day rush.

一天内加急

I really need to take that off the Web site.

我真该把那个从网上删掉

Okay well guess we'd better get started.

这样的话我们要马上开工了

You can't be serious.

不是说真的吧

Come on.

拜托

What about the living organism of the workforce

工作间的生命体

and the American spirit

和美国精神哪去了

And Jiminy Crockett at the Alamo

还有阿拉莫的吉米·克罗基特

Davy Crockett.

戴维·克罗基特

Jiminy Crockett was cricket.

吉米·克罗基特是只蟋蟀

yes yes I know that okay

行了行了我知道好了吧

I'm tired I've had like 18 cups of coffee.

我累死了喝了有18杯咖啡了

The point is if we just pull together we can do this.

关键是我们振作起来能做到的

Who's with me

谁和我一起

Penny although you may find it hard to believe

佩妮也许你不相信

We do have lives.

我们还是有自己的生活的

Leonard

莱纳德

Sorry.

抱歉

My apologies to the gay community

对新泽西的东卢瑟福的

of East Rutherford New Jersey.

同性恋联盟说的

Where's the coffee

咖啡在哪

We're all out.

我们都撤了

No problem.

没关系

I'll be back before this banana hits the ground.

在这香蕉落地之前我会回来的

Yes

吔!

Sorry guys but Secret Agent Laser Obstacle Lunch is just stupid.

抱歉各位但神秘激光障碍午餐真是愚蠢

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