生活大爆炸-S10E14_生活大爆炸

S01

What's going on with that woman you're dating

之前跟你约会的那女的怎么样了

I broke up with her.

我甩了她

Why

为什么

She said she didn't want to see me anymore

因为她说她再也不想见到我

and I found that insulting.

我觉得这话太侮辱人了

I thought things were going well. What happened

我还以为你们发展不错呢怎么了

I don't know she didn't even give me a reason.

我也不知道她甚至没告诉我原因

Oh not a problem we can figure this out.

小事一桩我们可以一起推算

What are the reasons women reject Raj

女人拒绝拉杰的原因有哪些呢

Can we not play this game

求不玩这个游戏

Doesn't like games. That's one.

不爱玩游戏这就算一个

Ignore him.

别理他

Yeah sorry about the breakup.

分手了你也别太难过

That's okay I'm fine.

没关系我没事

Of course you're fine.

你当然没事啦

Not every member of a species finds a mate.

一个物种里本就不是全部都能找到伴

Sir Isaac Newton died a virgin.

艾萨克·牛顿爵士到死都还是处男

Look at the contributions he made.

你看看他对人类的贡献有多大

I'm not a virgin Sheldon.

谢尔顿我不是处男

Wha... So now you think you're better than Isaac Newton

怎么你觉得自己比艾萨克·牛顿还牛逼了吗

No wonder women don't like you.

难怪女人都不喜欢你

You're not being very nice.

你这样太损了

What He said he was fine.

哪有他自己说他没事

Sometimes people say things they don't mean.

有时人们所言非所想

Oh that's a paradox.

这是个悖论

I If you meant what you just said

如果你刚才的所言即所想

then that means you may not have meant what you just said.

那就意味着你刚才所言可能非所想

Careful I saw this on Star Trek.

小心点我在《星际迷航》看过这幕

Smoke's gonna come out of his ears soon.

很快他耳朵要冒出蒸汽了

Hey boys. How's it going

小伙子们你们好吗

Well I thought we were having a nice conversation

我本以为我们大家在愉悦地交流

but it turns out I was being offensive.

结果发现原来我是在冒犯人

So normal. Yeah

-一如既往 -对...

Sheldon what did you do

谢尔顿你又干嘛了

We were discussing Raj's recent breakup

我们在讨论拉杰最近分手的事

and apparently I was insensitive to him.

显然是我没顾虑到他心情

It's okay I'm fine.

没关系我没事

You di Don't fall for it.

你有事别中了他的计

He'll get you to compare him to a dead virgin

他会诱拐你把他跟死去的处男做对比

and suddenly you're the bad guy.

然后突然间你就成了坏人

Sheldon when I said I was fine

谢尔顿我说我没事时

I meant I didn't want to talk about it anymore.

我的意思是我不想再谈这件事了

Then why didn't you say that

那你为什么不直接这么说

Because that's not what people do.

因为大家都不这么说

Well I would prefer if people told me

我宁愿大家直接告诉我

exactly what is on their mind.

他们心中真实的想法

No. No you don't you really don't.

不不会你不会你不会想要

I actually can't say "Don't" enough.

我再强调几百遍都不够

Well it certainly would be easier.

这至少会让相处简单很多啊

You have no idea what it's like

你们压根就不会懂

to struggle with recognizing emotional cues.

读不懂别人情绪的复杂心情

I'm sure it's extremely frustrating.

想必是非常烦心吧

Thank you. And also a little sad.

-是的谢谢 -还有点小伤心吧

O Okay now you're just showing off.

够了你现在就是在显摆你会读

You know I just read that a team at MIT

我听说麻省理工有个团队

developed a device that helps people read human emotions.

制造出了一种可协助解读人类情绪的装置

And you think we can get those guys

你觉得我们能让他们

to reprogram Sheldon Cool.

给谢尔顿重新编程吗酷啊

It's supposed to be accurate like 85% of the time.

该装置的准确率好像能到85%呢

Wow I find that hard to believe.

我觉得有点难以置信

That a bunch of awkward scientists

你不敢相信一群害羞内向

with no social skills would invent a machine

零社交技能的科学家会发明这种机器

to do it for them

来帮助他们读懂他人情绪吗

I take it back. I believe it.

我收回我的话我相信

You know if it's at MIT I can make some calls.

如果麻省理工有的话我可以打电话问问啊

Maybe we can get Sheldon a prototype.

或许可以帮谢尔顿搞个原型机来

What do you think

你觉得如何

A machine that reads emotions is intriguing.

能读懂情绪的机器的确挺吸引人

It could help me be a more considerate friend.

它能帮我成为一个更体贴的朋友

Wouldn't that be nice.

那何尝不是件好事

It could also help me identify my enemies

还可以帮助我找出我的敌人

discover their fears and then...

发现他们的恐惧然后...

I could use those fears to destroy them.

我就能利用他们的恐惧来摧毁他们

I like the first one.

我喜欢第一种用法

Our whole universe was in a hot dense state

Then nearly 14 billion years ago expansion started... Wait

The Earth began to cool

The autotrophs began to drool Neanderthals developed tools

We built the Wall We built the pyramids

Math Science History unraveling the mystery

That all started with a big bang

Bang

By aBU 20170217

生

活

大

爆

炸

第十季第十四集

Now that Sheldon's across the hall

现在谢尔顿搬到对面住了

have you decided what you're doing with his old room

你决定好了要把他就房间拿来干嘛吗

I was thinking maybe a library or a gaming room.

我在想看是改成小藏书室或是游戏房

You could make it a train room.

也可以改成火车玩具房啊

I don't like trains. You like trains.

我不喜欢火车喜欢火车的是你

I know and Amy says I can't have a train room.

我知道可是艾米不让我弄个火车玩具房

Sheldon I just heard from the guys at MIT

谢尔顿麻省理工的人回复我了

about that emotion reader they're sending a prototype

那个情绪解读机他们会送个原型机过来

for you to beta test.

让你做发行前测试

Wonderful.

太好了

Although I'm not sure how I feel

虽然我也不知道对成为

about being used as a guinea pig.

实验天竺鼠该作何感想

Well when you get the machine you can find out.

等你拿到机器你就知道该作何感想啦

Maybe I could use it

或许我可以拿来

to understand why women keep dumping me.

看看为什么女人不停甩我

Oh you don't need a machine for that just send a survey card

你不需要用机器啊你就发意见调查表

to all your ex girlfriends and tell them

给你所有的前女友再告诉她们

if they fill it out they might win a prize.

填表的人有机会中奖就行了

That's actually not a bad idea.

这主意还不赖啊

Maybe I could even get them all together

或许我可以让她们齐聚一堂

sort of like a... a focus group

弄成像焦点小组

to find out what's wrong with me.

来探讨出我到底是哪里有问题

No Raj that's a terrible idea.

别啊拉杰这是个馊主意

Yeah I was joking.

对啊我刚才在瞎说

You... Really

你们... 真的吗

Uh little tip jokes are often better

小秘诀笑话结尾通常用

when you end them with "Wocka Wocka" or "Ha cha cha."

"哇咔哇咔"或者是"哈恰恰"比较好

与知名美国单口相声演员吉米杜兰特的招牌语

分别是电视节目《大青蛙布偶秀》中角色

好消息我想买的大电视放得进游戏房

and if I leave the curtains open

而且如果我不拉上窗帘

I can watch it from work.

我工作时都能看得到

Hey can you hold off redoing the room

你能缓一缓改装那房间的事吗

My brother's coming out here in a few weeks.

我哥过几周会来这里

Oh. Yeah. Okay sure. What's going on with your brother

行啊没问题你哥哥怎么了

My dad asked if I can get him a job interview at my work.

我爸让我帮忙把他弄进我们公司面试

Is that a good idea

你确定这是个好主意吗

I mean you think they'll consider someone

你觉得他们会愿意让

who was in prison for selling drugs

坐过牢的人去卖药丸吗

Well I sell pharmaceuticals.

我卖的是药品

That's just a really hard to spell word for drugs.

是药丸的高档版

Well I'm sure he'll appreciate

我相信他也会很庆幸以后工作

carrying his samples in a briefcase instead of his colon.

"药"的样品能用公事包装而不是塞菊花里

How long do you think he'll stay

你觉得他会住多久呢

I I'm not sure. Maybe a few days.

不确定啊可能几天吧

Unless he gets the job then who knows

除非他面试过了那我就说不准了

"Who knows " That's exciting.

"说不准" 真让人激动啊

I'll get to wake up every morning

我可以每天早上醒来

and see if he's still here.

看他是否还在

You don't have a problem with this do you

你不会是有意见吧

Of course not. I mean he's your brother.

当然没有他是你哥嘛

Okay. Thank you you're the best.

谢谢你最好了

Remember that when the new TV falls off the wall

新电视从墙上掉下来砸死我们时

and crushes us both.

记住这点

This thing's pretty cool.

这东西真酷

It interprets emotions

利用无线信号

using a wireless signal to analyze subtle changes

分析呼吸和心率的细微变化

in breathing and heart rate.

来解读情绪

It's amazing a machine can do that.

机器可以做到这点太厉害了

Yes.

是的

Now when the robots rise up

以后机器人叛变

they'll know that I've been rooting for them the whole time.

他们会知道一直以来我都是支持他们的

The display is synced to your phone.

显示器和你的手机同步了

Give it a try.

来试试

All right.

好的

Now I'm gonna look at some pictures

我会看一些照片

to prompt an emotional response and we'll see

激发情绪反应我们来看看

if the machine can identify them accurately.

这台机器能否准确识别

angry and excited.

生气和激动

Not other things you're feeling like

不是其他那种复杂感觉比如

"What have I done with my life "

"我这辈子都干了些啥啊"

Okay I'm looking at the first picture.

好的我在看第一张照片

You are...

你

happy

开心

Yes. I'm looking at puppies.

我在看小狗

Somebody's ignoring their tiny needle teeth

有人无视了它们小小尖尖的牙齿

but all right.

不过算了

Try another one. Okay.

-换一张 -好的

What does it say I'm feeling

它说我的感觉是什么

Sad.

伤心

Yes. I'm looking at a picture of my grandma.

是的我在看我奶奶的照片

Oh that makes sense 'cause she's gone and you miss her.

这就对了因为她去世了你想念她

Yes.

是的

And you're worried that turkey neck is in your future.

你担心以后颈部也会像她那样松弛

What now see... Now it says you're mad.

现在它说你很生气

Make up your mind.

别转换得这么快行吗

Okay Emily.

好的艾米丽

Yeah sounds great.

很好

See you then.

到时见

Is that Emily your ex girlfriend

是你的前女友艾米丽吗

Yeah. I'm getting all my exes together

是的我请所有前女友齐聚一堂

in order to discuss why they broke up with me

讨论她们为什么和我分手

and how I can be a better boyfriend.

我怎么能成为一名更棒的男友

Oh God. You went through with that

老天你真这样做啊

What is wrong with you

你什么毛病啊

We are going to find out.

我们将寻找出答案

Why would you do that Raj

你为什么这样做拉杰

Well I want information in order to improve myself.

我希望得到令我改进的信息

You're not gonna get information

你不会得到信息

you're just gonna get criticism that hurts your feelings.

你只会得到伤害你感情的批评

Don't worry I'm a grown man.

别担心我是个大男人

I have a thick skin.

我脸皮很厚的

You're so stupid.

你真蠢

Hey

干嘛啦

Hey would you take a look at my brother's résumé

你看下我哥的简历好吗

I'm trying to help him clean it up a little.

我在帮他写得漂亮一点

Yeah sure.

好的

He really worked with the Drug Enforcement Agency

他真的和缉毒署合作过吗

He didn't know it till he was cuffed but yeah.

他在戴上手铐前不知道那也算

Hey Leonard if you're happy and you know it

莱纳德如果你开心你会知道

no need to clap your hands

不需要拍手[儿歌]

because I have an emotion detector.

因为我有情绪解读机

How's it working out

用着怎么样

Surprisingly well.

出奇好

That's great I'm happy for you.

真好我为你开心

No wait uh hold on.

等等

Oh what you are. Aren't you sweet

你是真开心啊真是好人

What's that Are you working on your resume

这是什么你在写简历吗

No it's my brother's. I'm trying

不是我哥的

to help him get a job out here.

我想帮他在这里找工作

And that makes Leonard angry.

这令莱纳德生气了

No it doesn't.

没有

What Leonard please. I know an angry face when I see it.

拜托莱纳德生气的表情我还是认识的

It's this red frowny guy on my phone.

手机上这个红色皱眉的家伙代表生气

What Are you really upset about Randall coming

怎么我哥要来你很生气吗

No. Yes.

-没有 -有

I said no. I It's like you're twins.

-我说了没有 -它和你的表情完全一样好吗

Leonard if you're mad about this just tell me.

莱纳德如果你生气直接告诉我

Fine.

好吧

You invited your drug dealer brother to stay with us

你邀请你的毒贩哥哥来和我们一起住

for God knows how long and didn't bother to ask me first.

天知道住多长时间却事先根本没问过我

He's my brother

他是我哥

I didn't think I needed your permission.

我不觉得我需要你的允许

Well hey. Now she's angry too.

瞧现在她也生气了

This thing works like gangbusters.

这东西太牛逼了

I'm not saying you have to ask my permission

我不是说你必须得到我的允许

but you could have talked to me about it

但你在答应前

before you said it was okay.

好歹知会我一声吧

Like you talked to me about your gaming room

像你知会我你的游戏室那样吗

Our gaming room

我们的游戏室

I was gonna put a scented candle in it.

我还打算往里摆一个香薰蜡烛呢

He's still mad.

他还在生气

Stop enjoying their fight.

别幸灾乐祸

You first.

你好意思说我

If you were this upset

如果你这么不高兴

why didn't you say so when I told you

我告诉你时你为什么不说

Because I didn't want to sound like a jerk.

因为我不想表现得像混蛋一样

Well you sound like one now. I don't see the big deal

你现在就是个混蛋我不觉得

if my brother comes and stays for a while.

我哥来住一段时间有什么大不了的

If you get him a job he's gonna live here forever

如果你帮他找到工作他会永远住在这里

He would get his own place.

他会自己找住处

Has he ever had his own place

他这辈子有过自己的住处吗

Yes

有过

Did it have a metal toilet next to the bed

床边就是金属马桶吗[牢房]

It still counts.

那...也算啊

You know how is this any different

这和你逼我与谢尔顿一起住

from you making me live with Sheldon

有什么区别

You... Hey

你...太伤人了

I shared my Honey Nut Cheerios with you.

人家的蜂蜜坚果脆谷乐都跟你分享了

You gave me a bill at the end of every month.

你每个月底都给我账单好嘛

Stay out of this.

别在这里瞎掺和

You and your stupid machine started this fight

这事就是你和你那台烂机器挑起来的

You are lucky that this feelings machine

你该庆幸这台情感机器

doesn't have feelings.

不具备任何情感

Come on Sheldon let's go.

好了谢尔顿咱们走吧

Gladly. Can we storm out

乐意至极我们可以摔门而去吗

I think it loses its impact if we're chatting about it.

你说出来就失去了震撼效果了

Fine.

好吧

I'll just give them the finger.

那我就对他们比那根手指吧

Okay first off

好了首先

I want to thank you all so much for coming.

感谢各位大驾光临

Howard is here to interpret for Emily

霍华德将为艾米丽担任手语翻译

初登场第5季第4集是聋哑人士

and to take notes.

同时负责记笔记

No he doesn't think it's stupid.

不他不觉得这样做很傻逼

Uh heads up both of you are named Emily

先说一下由于你们俩都叫艾米丽

so we'll call you "Red headed Emily"

所以我们称你为"红发艾米丽"

初登场第7集第17集是皮肤科医生

and you "Red headed Emily Junior."

而你是"红发艾米丽2号"

Hey you went out with him. I didn't.

当初和他交往的人是你不是我

Okay uh let's get things started.

好了我们开始吧

Um why don't we go around the room

我们先轮流来

say your name

介绍你的名字

and why you broke up with me.

以及和我分手的原因

Want to kick it off

你想先开始吗

Oh okay. Um... I'm Lucy

好的我叫露西

初登场第6季第16集

and I broke up with Raj

我和拉杰分手是因为

because I have severe social anxiety

我患有严重的社会焦虑症

and he kept trying to force me

而他总是强行将我置于

into uncomfortable situations.

非常尴尬的境地

Like this one

比如现在这样吗

Yeah.

没错

I did do that.

的确如此

I can be insensitive to other people's boundaries.

我有时对别人的底线不太敏感

Howard would you write that down

霍华德你能帮我记下来吗

Oh... schmuck. Got it.

脑子进水记好了

Uh next

下一位

Okay. Um...

好的

I'm Claire.

我叫克莱尔

初登场第9季第14集是位酒保

And I guess I broke up with you

我想我和你分手的原因

because you were just really needy.

主要是你太黏人了

Also you were incredibly vain

而且你还非常虚荣

like all the time you spent

比如你花了好多时间

shaping your eyebrows...

修你的眉型...

Okay new rule everybody only gets one.

新规则每个人只能说一条

Uh next

下一个

Ooh I'm not sure I'm comfortable

我不知道自己能不能

sharing details about our relationship in front of Howard.

在霍华德面前说出我们交往的细节

He's here to support me so anything you have to say

他是来支持我的你什么都可以

you can say in front of him.

在他面前说

Okay. Well whenever you and I were in bed...

好吧每次我俩上床时...

Howard get out.

霍华德滚出去

Not a chance.

门都没有

So you were telling us how Raj was terrible in bed.

刚才你说到拉杰床上功夫相当烂

Sheldon dinner's ready.

谢尔顿晚饭做好了

I made beef loaf because I know you're uncomfortable

我做了牛肉糜卷因为我知道

with the non specificity of meat loaf.

你不喜欢菜名含糊的肉糜卷

Sheldon

谢尔顿

Hey are you okay

你没事吧

Not really.

人家很不好

What's going on

你怎么了

I wish I never tried that device.

我真希望自己没用过那机器

And I know I said the same thing after the massage chair

我知道上次用过按摩椅后我也说了同样的话

but this time I mean it.

但这次我是认真的

I'm sorry Leonard and Penny hurt your feelings.

我很抱歉莱纳德和佩妮伤害了你的感情

It's more than that.

比那个严重多了

It's me.

是我的问题

I always knew

我一直都知道

I had trouble recognizing other people's emotions

自己在解读别人情绪方面有困难

but that machine just made it so real.

但机器把这个问题凸显了出来

Well everybody has things that they need help with.

每个人都有需要帮助的问题

Like me I can't see without my glasses.

比如我我摘了眼镜就看不清楚

And right now you're just a a cute pink smudge wearing

现在我看你就是一个可爱的粉团子

a childish green smudge.

裹着一身孩子气的绿团子

I thought I was getting better at it but clearly I'm not.

我以为自己有所改善了结果并没有

Yes you are.

你改善很多了

There have definitely been days

好几次我不开心时

when I was sad and you could tell.

你都看出来了

Yeah but that's shooting fish in a barrel.

但那就像是瓮中捉鳖手到擒来

You're kind of a sad sack.

你本身就是个悲伤聚合体

I'm sorry I shouldn't have said that.

抱歉我不该怎么说

I'm just upset.

我只是很难过

No see right there

不你看

you knew you hurt my feelings.

你能觉察到你伤了我的心

And I'm proud of you

我真为你骄傲

for reasons I'm sure have something to do with my father.

我之所以老悲伤肯定是受我爸影响

And if you don't like

如果你不喜欢那台机器

that machine get rid of it.

就不要用了

Because I love you exactly the way you are.

因为我爱的就是原来的你

I feel the same way about you.

我对你也是这种感觉

Now put your glasses back on.

现在把你的眼镜带上

You look weird.

你看起来怪怪的

I thought you were great

我觉得你很好

but oh my God you were

但是我的妈呀

so dominated by your parents.

你被你父母控制得太多了

Oh yeah and that used to drive me nuts.

没错这点经常让我抓狂

He's kind of a mama's boy.

他这人有点妈宝男

Kind of Whoa okay

-岂止有一点 -好了

That's enough.

够了

Write down "Loving son."

你就写"惹人爱的好儿子"

Can I just say something

我可以说两句吗

Going out with Raj

和拉杰交往

was one of the best things that ever happened to me.

是我遇到的最幸运的事

Yes I'll take you back.

很好我愿意和你复合

Let me finish.

让我说完

It's like I needed to go through that experience

感觉就像因为跟他交往了之后

to know what exactly I don't want in a man.

我才知道我不想要什么样的男人

Well that's hard to hear but I'll still take you back.

这话真伤人不过我还是愿意和你复合

You know the same thing happened to me.

我也有这种感觉

After I broke up with Raj I met Gary

我和拉杰分手后我遇到了盖瑞

who's just amazing.

他简直太棒了

Sorry is that "Gary" with one R or two

打扰下拼写是一个R还是两个

Would you stop writing

别写了好吗

Just wait. So... did all of you

慢着你们所有人

go on to better relationships after me

在和我分手后都有了更美好的恋情吗

Oh yeah.

是的

Without question.

毫无疑问

Little before actually.

我是在分手前就有了

Don't let him get away.

你可得牢牢抓住他

Wait. What did she say

慢着她说什么

Uh basically she traded you

可以这样说甩了你

for Bruce Wayne.

换来个蝙蝠侠

Okay maybe we should just end this.

我们还是到此结束吧

Wait hang on.

慢着

I just want to point out to everyone here

我想为在座各位指出

this is a man who is going to great lengths

这个男人竭尽全力

to better himself.

想让自己更优秀

Even at the risk of...

甚至冒着

being humiliated.

被羞辱的风险

And I for one think that's very brave.

至少我觉得这样做很勇敢

Thank you Howard.

谢谢你霍华德

Honestly I'm surprised you two didn't wind up together.

说实话我很意外你俩没有开花结果

Well like you gals I had to suffer through him

和你们一样我得先经历他这场风雨

to find Bernadette.

才能找到我老婆这道彩虹

Wish it were you.

偶也希望速你啊

Yes

什么事

We owe you an apology.

我们应该向你道歉

Oh it's fine. You needed a suitcase

没事啦你需要手提箱

I wasn't home you borrowed a suitcase.

我不在家你就借走个手提箱嘛

That was six years ago. I'm talking about tonight.

那是六年前的事了我说的是今晚

Well I thought we were going in order.

我以为按时间先后顺序来道歉

Look we got really angry at each other

我俩之间刚好世界大战爆发

and you just got caught in the middle of it.

而你正好撞上了

And...

还有

sorry about the suitcase.

手提箱的事很抱歉

Yeah well you should be.

道歉是应该的

Your socks were still in it.

里面还有你的袜子

I had to throw it away.

我只能扔了

Anyway

总之

I uh trust that you've resolved your conflict.

我相信你们已经解决了矛盾

Yes we're fine.

是我们没事了

Mm Penny's gonna call her dad and tell him it's not

佩妮会打电话给她爸爸说

a good time for Randall to visit.

他哥现在来时机不太好

Hopefully he won't be too upset.

只希望他不会生气

Oh you're his little girl he can't stay mad at you.

你是他的小棉袄他哪能气你多久

He won't be mad at me.

他当然不会生我的气

I mean you're the one who doesn't want my brother to come so...

是你不想让我哥来所以...

So you're gonna throw me under the bus

所以你想让我背黑锅吗

Oh I'm gonna throw you so hard

我会让你背个大大的黑锅

I might actually win a stuffed animal.

那锅大到可以给全村做饭了

Uh guys it sounds like you're getting angry again.

两位听起来你们又生气了

That's because we are.

那是因为这是事实

Yes

太好了

I don't need an emotion machine

我不需要情绪解读机

I am one

我就是情绪解读机

Thanks ladies This was fun

多谢了女士们太有意思了

Let's not wait so long for another bizarre awkward night.

下次的诡异尴尬夜别让我们期待太久哦

Well that was a waste of time.

真是浪费时间

I'm such an idiot.

我真是白痴

Don't beat yourself up.

别这么自责

That's what I'm here for.

批评你是我的工作

Maybe I won't settle down.

也许我不该定下来

Maybe I'll just play the field.

也许我要在花丛中过一过

Yeah the field was just here.

花丛刚才就在这屋里

The field said no.

花丛拒绝了

Dude come on.

兄弟拜托

Okay I'll tell you what.

这样吧

I'll make you a deal.

我们约好

30 years from now if you're still single

三十年后如何你依然单身

and things don't work out with me and Bernadette...

而我和伯纳黛特也离婚了

you and I can give it a go.

咱俩可以试试

I appreciate the offer but if things don't work out with you two

感谢你的好意但如果你俩离婚了

I'm swooping in on her like a vulture.

我一定像秃鹰一样扑向她

Too late. Stuart called dibs.

太迟了斯图尔特先订了

But theoretically if you and I

从理论上说如果我们

were in a gay relationship

是同志关系

how would we tell people

我们怎么告诉大家

Like print up announcements

贴出公告吗

I don't know. What difference does it make

我不知道贴了公告会有区别吗

Well I want to make sure we get invited to all the parades.

我希望所有同志游行都能邀请我们

Those do look fun.

听起来的确有趣

Yeah. Well if you want to march in a fishnet crop top

是啊如果你想穿网眼露脐装游行

you better lay off that dip.

你最好别碰蘸酱

If you didn't want me to eat it

如果你不想让我吃

why'd you put it out It was for the girls.

-为什么摆出来 -是给姑娘们的

They broke up with me I don't care if they get fat.

她们甩了我我才不管她们是否会长胖

I'm not gonna get fat.

我不会长胖的

Oh you want to bet You never exercise.

想打赌吗你从来不锻炼

Fine. Look I'll exercise right now.

瞧着我现在就锻炼

One...

一

two...

二

These are crunches by the way.

对了这是仰卧起坐[很脆]

Very mature.

真够成熟的

Keep eating like that.

继续这样吃

You're gonna have a heart attack.

你会发心脏病的

Okay. How about if I eat like this

好的我这样吃呢

You're such a child.

你真幼稚

Hey is that any way to talk to your future husband

对你未来老公你就这种态度吗

Hey I was being hypothetical okay

我只是假设

I would never marry you. Please.

-我永远不会和你结婚的 -得了

When you see the ring I pick out you're gonna melt.

等你看到我选的求婚戒指时你会感动到喷泪

Yeah right.

想得美

Wait is it rose gold

是玫瑰金的吗

Actually don't tell me. I want to be surprised.

别告诉我我想有个惊喜

So did you wind up sending that machine back

你最后把机器送回去了吗

I did. You know I'm not even sure how accurate it was.

是的我都不确定它的准度到底行不行

I took it to the train store it said everyone was sad.

我把它拿到火车商店它说所有人都很伤心

I finally got Halley to sleep.

我终于把哈雷哄睡着了

You know I just read a study that suggests

我刚看到有一项研究说

new mothers are better at senseing emotions

初为人母的人在情绪感知方面有两年的优势

for up to two years.

比普通人多两年优势

It's ture.

这是真的

Pregnancy causes physiological change in the brain

怀孕引起大脑的生理变化

and resulting increase empathetic.

导致感同身受的能力增加

So all we need to do is got Shledon knocked up.

原来我们只需要搞大谢尔顿的肚子就行

Can't. He's already fixed when I found him at the shelter.

不行我在动物收容所找到他时他已经被阉了

Hey Bernadette let's test this theory.

伯纳黛特我们来测试下这一理论

What're you thinking I'm feeling right now

你觉得我现在有什么感受

Let's see.

来看看

You're better than us

你比我们优秀

A little bit sorry for us

有点可怜我们

But mostly gald you don't have to be us.

但最主要是开心不必成为我们这样的人

Keep filling this one with baby she's good.

接着让她大肚子她真厉害

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