生活大爆炸-S10E23_生活大爆炸

S01

Previously on The Big Bang Theory...

《生活大爆炸》前情提要

What's this Oh nothing

- 这是什么 - 没什么

just some math we don't need.

一些我们用不着的数学

This is a different approach.

这是另一种方案

You trying to get the guidance system even smaller

你们是想把这个导向系统做得更小吗

It's just a... theory.

这只是纸上谈兵

Well it's not even worked out.

都还没算出来呢

I want this.

我要这个方案

Uh but we've already met the agreed upon specs.

但我们已经做到之前约定的规格了

Going smaller would require weeks' worth of new computations.

将规格变小需要花好几周重新计算

So get the kid with the two shirts to do it.

那就让那个长袖套短袖的小孩做啊

Sir I mean if I may

长官请容许我说一句

uh we've put a lot of thought and effort

我们已经花费大量的心思和功夫

into this current prototype.

在现在这台原型机上

It's a really elegant solution

这真的是一个完美的方案了

and most importantly it works.

最重要的是它可以实现

You both make excellent points.

你们俩说得都非常有道理

And thank you for presenting it so articulately.

感谢你们如此清晰地表达出来

Make this.

把这个方案做出来

时至今日

Champagne

香槟

champagne Thank you.

- 香槟 - 谢谢

and for the world's tallest second grader apple juice.

以及全世界身高最高二年级生的苹果汁

No bendy straw some party.

连可弯曲吸管都没有好一个派对啊

Hey a a toast.

敬个酒

Thank you all for your support

谢谢你们在

while we worked on our Air Force project.

我们做这个空军项目时给予的各种支持

And please know that

希望你们明白

we could not have done it without you

我们的成功有你们的一份功劳

so cheers.

干杯

You know it's nice of you to acknowledge us

很感激你愿意答谢我们

but this is your accomplishment.

但这是属于你们的成就

Yeah you guys did this all on your own.

对啊你们仨齐心协力把它完成了

Without me.

三缺一

To success without Raj.

敬抛下拉杰并获取成功一杯

So what happens next

那接下来呢

Phase two

第二阶段

we test it perfect it

测试它再完善它

and hope to live long enough to see the movie

然后祈祷自己命长到足以

based on our lives starring more attractive versions of us.

看到由超帅气演员来扮演我们的传记电影

Yeah I'll definitely live long enough

我肯定能活够久

vitamin C.

维他命C

First thing tomorrow morning we're back at it.

明早第一件事就是我们仨继续开工

Without me.

继续三缺一

I hope his character doesn't make it into the movie

希望他这个角色不会被写进电影里

he's kind of a bummer.

太扫兴了

Leonard Hofstadter.

莱纳德·霍夫斯塔德

Access granted.

允许进入

Hmm. I don't care if this thing's burning out my retinas

就算这玩意会烧掉我的视网膜也没关系

it makes me feel special.

它让人家感觉好特别

Now before we field test I think we...

在我们实地测试前我们...

What the hell

什么鬼

Where is everything

东西都去哪了

Who else has access to this room

还有谁有进入许可

It's a secure lab in a classified facility

这是机密建筑里的安全实验室

only the U.S. government and us.

只有美国政府与我们才可进入

This is very disconcerting.

好令人不安啊

But the movie did just get good.

但我们的电影一下就精彩了起来

Our whole universe was in a hot dense state

宇宙一度又烫又稠密

Then nearly 14 billion years ago expansion started... Wait

140亿年前终于爆了炸... 等着瞧!

The Earth began to cool

地球开始降温

The autotrophs began to drool Neanderthals developed tools

自养生物来起哄穴居人发明工具

We built the Wall We built the pyramids

我们建长城我们建金字塔

Math Science History unraveling the mystery

数学自然科学历史揭开神秘

That all started with a big bang

一切由大爆炸开始

Bang

By aBu 20170407

大

爆

炸

第十季第二十三集

生

活

Sir I I I'm sorry but I just don't get it.

长官抱歉但我就是想不明白

Y You came into our lab in the middle of the night

你大半夜跑进我们的实验室

and took our prototype and all of our research

拿走我们的原型机与实验成果

and didn't even tell us

完全不知会我们一声吗

Sounds like you get it.

听起来你已经想明白了啊

Well why would you do that

你为什么要这么做

You guys completed phase one we'll take it from here.

你们完成了第一阶段剩下的我们来接手就行

Where did you move it

你把东西转移到哪里了

I can't tell you that.

无可奉告

Are you implementing phase two

你要施行第二阶段计划吗

I can't tell you that.

无可奉告

Wait so you're just going to take all the work

所以你打算抢走我们

we've done for the last year and toss us aside

去年一整年的成果然后把我们一脚踢开

That one I can tell you yes.

这个我能告诉你们是的

This is all very upsetting.

这好令人伤心啊

I'm sorry to hear that.

听到你伤心我也很遗憾

As you know the primary focus of the United States military

毕竟美国军方的主要焦点就放在

is people's feelings.

照顾人民情感上了

If that's sarcasm please save it for our enemies.

如果你是在讽刺请留去讽刺我国的敌人

Well I may be moving out soon.

我可能很快就搬走了

I think I found a place to live.

我找到地方住了

Oh I'm sorry to hear that.

真不想听到你要搬走

Really

真心的吗

You kept sending me apartment listings.

你一直给我发公寓租赁广告

Um... well I...

这个嘛我...

yeah you got me.

好吧我无力反驳

Where are you moving

你要搬去哪里

And when But a also where

什么时候搬还有搬去哪里

Bert has a room for rent.

伯特有一间房出租

So you're gonna be roommates with Bert

所以你要跟伯特当室友吗

Uh no it's uh pretty private actually

不是其实那房间挺私密的

it's over his garage.

在他的车库楼上

So the only time I'll see him is when he pulls his car in

所以我唯一会见到他的时间是他停车进来

does his laundry or practices drums in my dining room.

洗衣服或在我餐厅练鼓的时候

Well good for you. Mm hmm.

那挺好的

I actually have a little news myself.

箕实我也有个消息要分享

Okay we're just gonna circle back to when he's moving out

好吧话题会回到他什么时候搬走吗

Okay that's cool.

算了没关系

I was uh asked to be a visiting researcher at Princeton.

我受邀赴普林斯顿大学任访问学者

Hey that's amazing.

太厉害了

Good for you. Congratulations.

- 真棒 - 恭喜你

Thanks but the thing is I'll be gone for a few months

谢谢但问题是我得离开几个月

and I don't know how Sheldon's gonna feel about that.

我不知道谢尔顿会对此作何感想

Oh come on he's a grown man he can take care of himself.

拜托他是个成年人完全可以照顾自己

You really believe that

你真的这么认为吗

Once again you got me.

我再次无力反驳

How can you work on something for a year

你努力了一年的心血

and they just take it

他们怎么可以就这样夺走

I can't believe the Air Force would treat us like that.

真不敢相信美国空军会这样对我们

You know I have a good mind to stop paying my taxes.

我很想从今天开始不再交税

It's too bad I enjoy doing them so much.

我超享受计算税费的过程可惜了

The Air Force did it again.

美国空军又出手了

They're erasing our lives

他们要抹去我们的生活

Third floor wrong apartment.

这是三楼走错公寓了

Although if anyone's gonna clean out your apartment

不过如果有人要把你们公寓清空

and disappear it'd be Penny.

然后消失那人一定是佩妮

She might disappear

她可能会消失

but she's definitely not cleaning anything.

但要想她会清任何东西那是不可能的

It's okay everything's here.

没事一切都在

Oh hey what's going on

发生什么事了

You won't believe it

说了你们也不会信

the military confiscated our project.

军方没收了我们整个项目

What You're kidding.

- 什么 - 开玩笑吧

Why would they do that

他们为什么要这么做

They wouldn't say.

无可奉告

I feel so betrayed.

我深深地觉得被背叛了

You know all my life I thought Uncle Sam was a friendly uncle

我此生一直以为山姆大叔[美国政府]是

who brought you presents.

友好会送人礼物那种大叔

Turns out he's the other kind.

结果他恰怡相反

Sheldon I'm so sorry.

谢尔顿真是太遗憾了

Thank you. Can we just talk about something else

多谢关心我们能聊点别的吗

Yeah what's going on with you guys

对啊你们有什么消息要分享吗

Give us some good news.

给我们来点好消息

Amy's got some news.

艾米有话说

Yeah um...

是的

Raj is moving out.

拉杰要搬走了

Oh no.

不要啊

When

什么时候

You doing okay

你还好吧

Not really.

不好

Want me to put on some Neil Diamond

用我给你放尼尔·戴蒙德的歌吗

That always makes you feel better.

你每次听了都会开心点

No.

不用了

Then you'll get all sexed up and I'm not in the mood.

你听一听就会开始发情而我现在没心情

I mean an entire year wasted.

整整一年都白费了

You might be forgetting another accomplishment of the past year.

你或许忘记了去年你还有一项成就

Oh. Yeah yeah we brought life into the world.

是是是我们还将一个小生命带来人世

Really

不是吧

That's the importance you put on us having a baby

你就这么形容我们生孩子的重要性吗

I'm happy about it but I mean it's not like I did much.

我对此当然开心啊但我又没怎么出力

I mean after the first three minutes

我是说前三分钟过后

it was pretty much all you.

剩下的都是你的功劳

So did you tell him about Princeton yet

你跟他说了去普林斯顿大学的事了吗

No I'm waiting till he's in a good mood.

还没我想等他心情好时再说

Oh sweetie you might not live that long.

亲爱的那你可能活不到那个时候

I don't know maybe I shouldn't go.

我不知道或许我不该走

Oh stop it he'll be fine.

别闹了他会没事的

I guess.

应该吧

And he'll have you and Leonard

反正他还有你和莱纳德

right across the hall the whole time.

你们就住在对门

Oh damn wait you know maybe you shouldn't go...

糟糕等等或许你不该走

Got to go.

挂了啊

Morning.

早上好

I apologize for exceeding my allotted bathroom time.

我为占用超过分配好的如厕时间道歉

Are you feeling okay

你还好吗

Not really.

不好

Apparently grief can make one less regular.

显然悲伤会影响人如厕的规律性

Oh I'm sorry to hear that.

听到这个消息我也很难过

No I sat and I sat but to no avail.

我坐在马桶上等了又等但徒劳无功

Oh the the more details the more sorry.

细节越多我越难过

Well maybe this'll cheer you up.

或许这个能让你开心一点

I made your favorite oatmeal...

我做了你最喜欢的燕麦片

plain.

什么都没加

What's the occasion

今天是什么好日子啊

No occasion I just wanted to do something nice for you.

没什么我只是想做点让你开心的事

You're so kind.

你人真好

You know I don't know how I ever got by without you.

真不知道认识你之前我是怎么活过来的

That's sweet but you... you did just fine on your own.

你嘴真甜但你之前一个人也活得好好的

Well I thought that too

我本来也以为是这样

but I've come to realize I am completely dependent on you.

但我逐渐意识到我对你十分依赖

Sheldon you're you're being silly.

谢尔顿说什么傻话

No to wake up every morning and know you're there

不每天早上醒来知道你在身边

is a great comfort to me.

我都感到很安心

Mmm tasteless.

寡淡无味

How do you do it

你手艺怎么那么巧

You know what you need to do is

你现在要做的就是

put this Air Force project behind you

忘掉这个空军项目

and just dive into something new.

把精力投入新的研究

Well there is our quantum cognition experiment.

倒是可以投入我们的量子认知试验

You and I could spend more time on that.

我和你可以多花点时间在那上面

Oh I don't know

我说不好

I mean let's say we succeed in proving

就算我们成功证明了

that our consciousness creates reality.

我们的意识创造现实

I mean what will we have really accomplished

那也算不上什么伟大成就

You know a loaf of bread's still three bucks.

一块面包还是卖三块钱啊

I'm confused.

我不懂了

You're always saying that you want to spend more time with me.

是你总说希望有更多时间和我相处

That is true I have said that.

对我是这么说过

Well a lot it's very annoying.

你整天说真的很烦

Has something changed

发生什么变化了吗

Um is there something that you're not telling me

你是不是有事瞒着我

I was offered a summer research fellowship at Princeton.

我得到了普林斯顿大学的夏季研究奖学金

Princeton

普林斯顿吗

A fine institution.

很不错的大学

The place where Albert Einstein taught.

阿尔伯特·爱因斯坦教过书的地方

And where Leonard got his PhD

莱纳德也是在那里拿到博士学位

so it may have gone downhill.

所以那学校可能没落了

Yeah that's the one.

对就是那所

Well that's wonderful.

这是很棒的消息

Congratulations.

恭喜你

Well I I haven't accepted it yet.

我还没接受

I wanted to talk to you first.

我想先跟你商量一下

Wh What is there to talk about

有什么好商量的

You have to take it. It's important.

你必须接受这很重要

So are you.

你也很重要

Thank you but I'll be fine.

谢谢但我不会有事的

Are are you sure

你确定吗

Yes. I may have lost my guidance system and my girlfriend

是的虽然我可能失去了导向系统和女友

but I still have a colon full of yesterday's meals

但我结肠里还有昨天吃的食物

to keep me company.

陪伴着我

Although thanks to your high fiber breakfast

不过因为你做的高纤早餐

I'm sure that'll be leaving me too.

它们很快也要离我而去了

Really

真的吗

He doesn't put raisins or banana slices or anything in it

他都不往里面加葡萄干或香蕉片那些吗

I don't think plain oatmeal was the point of that story.

我觉得纯燕麦不是这件事的重点

I mean I like a little brown sugar...

我是喜欢加点红糖啦

Guys.

姐妹们

Sorry Sorry.

- 抱歉 - 不好意思

You're still gonna go right

你还是会去吧

I don't know.

我也不知道

Sheldon's so vulnerable right now.

谢尔顿现在那么脆弱

Oh come on. Look if the roles were reversed

听着如果你们角色调换

he'd be on the first train to New Jersey

他会马上坐第一班火车去新泽西

or the second train if there were teenagers on the first one.

如果第一班上有青少年的话他会搭第二班

Well distance might be nice.

再说距离不见得是坏事啊

The last time a big project ended for Howie

上次华仔完成一个大型项目后

he wouldn't stop following me around.

我到哪儿他都要跟着

He even went with me to get a mammogram.

我去做乳腺X光检查他也要一起去

Well what's wrong with that

那有什么问题

No he wanted to get one with me

他想跟我一起做检查

like some kind of weird couple's massage.

跟某种诡异的情侣按摩似的

And yet you bore his child. Neato.

然而你还是给他生了孩子厉害

You're excited about this opportunity right

你还是对这个机会感到兴奋的对吧

Of course. I get to be part of the first team

当然了我能成为第一组

to use radon markers to map the structures that...

使用氡标记来映射结构...

Okay a simple yes will do.

行了说"是的"就够了

You have to go.

你一定要去

I know but what if Sheldon...

我知道可如果谢尔顿...

Okay listen to me. Your relationship can handle

听我说就算分隔两地一阵子

being long distance for a while.

你们俩的感情也不会受影响

It's not like you two are very physical.

你们俩本来"亲密"接触也不多

Hey you don't know what goes on behind closed doors.

你又不知道我们关起门来都干了什么

A lot of lectures

总给你讲课吗

All right so you know.

看来你还真知道

I'm telling you if you don't go

相信我如果你不去

you'll end up regretting it.

你会后悔一辈子

Wait up Oh great.

- 等等我 - 又来了

You left something at home.

你有东西忘记带了哦

A big hug Oh

人家的爱心大抱抱

I found it right next to these kisses.

还有人家的爱心小亲亲

It's too late for me.

我已经没救了

Save yourself.

你快逃吧

So are you excited to have your own place again

又要有自己的窝了开心吗

I am but I'll miss you guys.

开心不过我会想你们的

Ah we'll miss you too.

我们也会想你的

Wha... you could try saying that without smiling.

那... 你说这话时能把那抹窃笑抑制住吗

I'm trying. This is the best I can do.

我努力过了实在是忍不住呀

What are you doing

你在干什么

What does it look like

你们看起来这像什么

I'm playing sad harmonica...

我在吹奏悲伤的口琴曲

in an apartment as empty as my heart.

在一间四壁空空犹如我心空空的公寓里

Why

发生什么事了

I got the blues.

人家忧郁了

My baby done left me.

我的宝贝要离我而去

Come on Sheldon.

拜托谢尔顿

Amy's only gone for a few months.

艾米不过是去几个月而已

And now that I'm moving out your old room is empty

现在我搬走了你的旧房间也空出来了

so you can stay there whenever you want.

你随时随地都可以回去住啊

Uh could I talk to you in the hall for a sec

能和你在过道上聊两句吗

Yeah sure.

可以呀

Sheldon you're being silly.

谢尔顿你别犯傻了

Am I

我在犯傻吗

Yesterday I had an Air Force project

昨天我还在负责空军项目

a girlfriend who lived with me

有个同居的女友

and my good friend Raj right across the hall.

好朋友拉杰就住在我对门

Do you really care about that last one

你真的在意最后这一点吗

No but that list was sounding a little thin.

不在意他是给我这单子凑数的

Instead of dwelling on the negative think about this.

别光想不好的事换个角度看问题

Your girlfriend was given an amazing opportunity

你的女朋友得到了如此珍贵的机会

which gives you an opportunity

也让你可以借机向她

to show her that you're a loving and supportive boyfriend.

展现你是个能给她爱与支持的男友

So trick her.

所以要唬弄她

All right let me start again.

让我重新说一遍

Uh... you and Amy...

你和艾米

Can I get my stuff

我能先把东西拿出来吗

Sounds like it's gonna be a while.

听起来你们还得聊好长一段时间呢

I missed you.

人家好想你

Come here let's talk.

过来我们聊聊

Ooh. Sounds serious.

听起来很严重

Have I been a bad boy

是我做错事了吗

Am I gonna get a spanking

你要打人家的小屁股了吗

'cause you know I... Just listen.

- 你知道我... - 安静听我说

I don't know if you realize this

我不知道你有没有发现

but whenever you're between projects

但每次你手上没有项目时

you tend to get a little insecure.

你就变得没有安全感

Oh. A little clingy.

有点黏人

I know and I'm sorry.

我知道人家错错啦

Oh oh oh okay stop.

好了好了住手

Stop.

停下来

I love when you're affectionate

我喜欢你情深款款的时候

but this is not coming from a good place.

但你这不是正常的反应

Well excuse me

哎哟喂

but what did you do when you worked on that allergy drug

那你上次花了两年时间研发过敏药

for two years and the FDA shut down your project

最后研究却被药监局枪毙时呢

I signed us up for ballroom dance class.

我替咱俩报名了交际舞的课

Okay and what did you do

很好还有你那一次

when they took you off the antifungal team

被踢出抗真菌团队的时候呢

I made us have a baby.

我逼着你让我怀孕了

所以结论是

Bring it in.

放马过来吧

And now the movie just got rated "R."

本电影刚刚被评为限制级

You going somewhere

你要去哪里吗

No but you are

不是你要走

so I got you this as a present.

所以我送你这个作为礼物

Sheldon that isn't necessary.

谢尔顿你不用这么做

No it is.

不我需要

Leonard pointed out to me

莱纳德告诉我

that I'm not always a loving and supportive boyfriend

我并不是一个时常能给予你爱与支持的男朋友

so here's some quality luggage.

所以我给你买了高质量的行李箱

Thank you.

谢谢

The salesman said it could survive a plane crash so...

售货员说坠机这箱子都不会摔坏所以...

Perhaps you should fly inside it.

也许你应该坐在箱子里面飞

Does this mean you're okay with me going

这是说你同意我离开吗

Well I'm not looking forward to it

我并不期待

but it is a wonderful opportunity

但这是千载难逢的机会

and you need to take it.

你必须接受

Besides Princeton is in New Jersey

而且普林斯顿在新泽西

so it's not like you're gonna want to stay.

所以我也不用怕你想落地生根

Uh I know it's not your birthday

我知道今天不是你的生日

but if you're interested...

但如果你有性趣...

I am. Okay.

- 我有 - 好

Oh and just to be clear

我得说清楚

I'm not being intimate with you in order to keep you from going.

我和你亲热并不是为了把你留下

I wasn't thinking that.

我没这样想

Well no it's just I'm just warning you you know

不我只是警告你

if you find yourself 3 000 miles away

当你发现自己在五千公里之外

and craving a a hit of this you know...

渴望得到这诱人的身躯

...I can't Skype it to you.

我不能通过视频给你

That's a risk I'm willing to take.

我愿意冒这个险

All right then.

那好吧

Let's go to the bedroom remove our clothes

我们进卧室除去衣衫

fold them neatly...

叠得整整齐齐

...and engage in frenzied lovemaking.

再开始狂野性爱

What if we don't fold our clothes at all

如果我们不叠衣服呢

I d... or...

我...或者

what if we fold them

如果我们叠起来呢

Well here's your key back.

钥匙还给你们

Thank you.

谢谢

As soon as I have the place set up I'm gonna have you guys over.

我把家里布置好就请你们过去玩

Oh we would love that.

感谢邀请

I really can't thank you enough for taking me in.

你们收留我我真是感激不尽

You know I was in a pretty low place in my life and...

我处在人生的低谷还有...

Oh Amy you naughty vixen.

艾米你这个顽皮的小妖精

Anyway uh as I was saying

总之我刚说到

I was at a pretty low place in my life and uh

我处在人生的低谷中还有

if it wasn't for friends like you...

如果没有你们这样的朋友

My goodness that form of stimulation

我的天这种刺激方式

is highly efficient.

太高效了

I can't compete with that. Bye.

哥比不过他们拜

Should we give them their privacy

我们应该给他们点隐私吗

I want to but I don't think I can.

我想但我做不到

Whoopee Okay I'm good now.

- 爽 - 好了听够了

Okay the car is waiting.

车在等我

Do you want to walk me downstairs

你要送我下楼吗

Of course.

当然

Here here let me.

让我来拿

I've been doing a little research on New Jersey

我对新泽西做了下调研

and I was delighted to learn

我很高兴地得知

that their chief agricultural product is sod.

他们的主要农产品是草皮

Is it Hmm yes.

- 是吗 - 没错

Yeah perhaps I've been harder on them than they deserve.

也许我以前对他们的态度太严厉了

Do you think it's possible

你觉得有没可能

you might enjoy being on your own for a little while

你会享受一段独处的时光呢

It's hard to say.

很难说

I've never really lived by myself.

我从来没真正一个人住过

What if I become strange and eccentric

如果我变得古怪又神经怎么办

I'll love you no matter what.

无论怎样我都爱你

Howard Hughes saved his urine in milk bottles.

比如霍华德·休斯把自己的尿存在牛奶瓶里

电影制片人导演企业家

We'll cross that bridge when we come to it.

真有这天船到桥头自然直

And you'll text me when you arrive at the airport I will

- 你到机场后会发短信给我吗 - 会

And when you're at the gate.

到登机口也会吗

And if you see any actors from Game of Thrones in first class

如果你在头等舱看到《权力的游戏》里的演员呢

I don't know what they look like but sure.

我不知道他们的样子不过我会的

And don't forget to Skype me when you arrive. I won't

- 到了后别忘跟我视频 - 好的

And every morning. Got it.

- 每天早上 - 明白

Now of course my 9 00 a.m. is your noon

当然我这边9点你那边已经是中午了

so let's avoid the whole "good morning "

咱们直接避免"早上好"

"good afternoon" minefield

"中午好"的误区

and let's just say "Hello."

直接说"你好"吧

Good thinking.

想得真周到

And just remember I am proud of you

记住我为你感到骄傲

and I support you in all that you do.

你做什么我都支持你

Thank you. That means a lot.

谢谢你意义重大

Oh and one last thing.

还有一件事

If you find yourself working with a male scientist

如果你在工作中碰到一位男性科学家

who's as smart as me as tall as me

他和我一样聪明一样高大

and has hair like Thor

留着雷神索尔的发型

well then I want you to step away from the situation

我要你马上远离现场

and call me immediately.

立刻给我打电话

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