生活大爆炸-S06E17_生活大爆炸

S01

Previously on The Big Bang Theory...

《生活大爆炸》前情回顾

Can I have your attention please

请大家听我说几句

We're all here tonight

今晚我们齐聚一堂是因为

because we have no one to be with.

我们没有另一半相陪

We've got to stop defining our self worth

我们不能再以是否有恋爱对象

by whether or not we're in a relationship.

来定义我们的自我价值

We are a community

我们是一个联盟

and as long as we have each other

只要我们团结在一起

we're never truly alone.

我们就不是寂寞的

That was cool. What you said.

你说的那些话真不错

Thank you.

谢谢

Uh... would you like to uh...

你想不想...

get a cup... a cup of coffee...

去喝杯咖啡

Okay.

好的

Later losers

哥先走一步了废柴联盟

事到如今

So then I went to Cambridge which was wonderful

然后我去了剑桥超美妙的时光

not only because it's a good school

不只是因为那是名校

but because it totally looks like Hogwarts.

是因为那里看起来超像霍格沃茨的呢

小说《哈利波特》中主角们就读的学校

That's where I fell in love with astronomy

我就是在那里爱上了天文学

and now I'm an astrophysicist at Caltech

我现在是任职于加州理工的天体物理学家

so I guess you could say uh

所以也可以这么说...

Raj is my name and stars are my game.

拉杰是我名星辰是我命

And rhyming is also my game.

我还有押韵命哦

So uh two games.

可以算是"一杰两命"

Uh anyway that that's enough about me.

好啦我自己的事情说够了

I want to hear everything about you.

我想听听关于你的一切

I have to go to the bathroom.

我要去一趟厕所

I go to the bathroom too.

我也会去厕所

Sometimes more frequently than I care to admit.

虽然有时候频繁到我都不好意思说了

Oh I've had it checked out it's nothing.

不过我给医生检查过了一切正常

This is going great

也太顺利了吧

Can I have a refill on my chai tea

能帮我的印度茶续杯吗

Yes...

太好了

I have a good feeling about this.

感觉就十分有戏啊

I should have bought condoms.

早知道就买好套套了

第六季第十七集

生活大爆炸

Hello I'm Dr. Sheldon Cooper.

您好我是谢尔顿·库珀博士

Welcome to Sheldon Cooper Presents Fun with Flags.

欢迎收看由谢尔顿·库珀出品的《有趣的旗帜》

My apologies that this episode is coming late.

在此对本集节目的延误出品致歉

I did shoot one last week in honor of Black History Month

上周我曾拍摄了"黑人历史月"纪念集

but I was informed by my roommate

但后来受到我室友的提点

that my spot on portrayal of George Washington Carver

我在节目中对乔治·华盛顿·卡弗的精湛描述

农业化学家对美国农业有巨大贡献

乔治·华盛顿·卡弗黑人美国教育家植物学家

could be considered "wildly racist."

会有人觉得带有"严重种族歧视"

My heart goes out to the members

我的心一直与所有的

of the African American community

非裔美国人群体同在

who like me have been kept down by The Man.

我们都是受所谓"高层"压迫的苦命人

Now Fun with Flags is not just for the flag aficionado

《有趣的旗帜》不只是给旗帜狂热爱好者看的

it's also for the flag novice

也十分适合新晋旗帜迷

so to help me with that

因此请了位特别嘉宾

please welcome my friend neighbor and flag virgin

大家欢迎我的朋友邻居旗帜界处女

yeah not a real virgin.

不是现实生活的处女

She's had coitus many times.

她有过多次交媾经验了

Sometimes within earshot of this flag enthusiast.

有时就在本人听得见的范围里交媾呢

Once while he was trying to watch The Incredibles.

有次还是在本人在看《超人特工队》的时候

Penny.

佩妮

Hello.

你好啊

So Penny I understand

佩妮我知道

you would like to learn more about flags.

你对旗帜有相当浓厚的兴趣对吗

Yeah I can't tell you how many times

对啊我有过太多次

I've been at a party where everyone's talking about flags

参加派对时别人在大聊特聊旗帜

and I just couldn't join in. Yeah.

而我却完全插不上话的经验了

Well you came to the right place.

那你来这里就对啦

Uh I'm sorry can we just pause for a minute

抱歉我们能暂停一下下嘛

What's wrong

怎么了

I just think it might look more natural

我只是觉得如果你对着我说话

if you talked to me instead of the camera

会比你对着摄影机说话更自然

you know like like a real conversation.

这样看起来更像在轻松聊天

It's something we work on in my acting class.

我们在表演课上有教过这个

Interesting.

有意思

A few people in the comments section have said

有些人在评语栏就有留言过

that my delivery is robotic.

说我的教学像机器人

Perhaps that isn't the compliment it sounds like.

我一直以为是在称赞我

Yeah let's try it again and maybe this time

我们再试一遍吧这一次

you could work on your body language a bit.

也多注意一下你的肢体语言

You know when you're all hunched like that

当你这样弯腰驼背

you're shutting the audience out

会像是拒观众于千里之外

but when you're relaxed and open

如果你放松肢体张开

you're inviting them in.

会像是欢迎大家进入

Right.

有道理

And which one do I want

那我该用哪一种呢

Let's try open.

欢迎大家那种啊

If our friend the flag has taught me anything

我们的好友旗帜教过我的一件事就是

it's to go where the wind takes you.

向着风指引你的方向飘

As long as you remain firmly attached to a rigid pole.

不过要先确保自身良好地固定在旗杆上

And... action.

开始

So Penny...

佩妮

what sort of flag questions keep you awake at night

哪些对旗帜的疑问会让你夜不成寐呢

Um well I'm from Nebraska.

我是内布拉斯加州人

So what can you tell me about the state flag

不如你给我讲讲我们的州旗

Gosh Penny...

天啊佩妮

what'd you have for breakfast

你今早早餐吃了啥啊

A big glass of good question juice

喝了一杯"超棒问题果汁"吗

The Nebraska state flag is simply the state seal

内布拉斯加州的州旗面就只是州徽

on a field of blue.

印在蓝底上

Spread your legs invite them in.

打开腿欢迎大家进来

I'm telling you something's wrong.

相信我绝对不对劲

I can always feel it when Raj is in trouble.

拉杰碰到麻烦的时候我都会有感应

Geez how close were you guys before we got married

天啊我们结婚前你们俩是有多亲密啊

Don't look under that rock.

不要知道比较好

Raj you okay You in there

-拉杰你没事吧 -你在家吗

Go away

走开啦

Come on buddy open up.

兄弟开门嘛

We're worried about you.

我们都很担心你

Oh just because I stopped going to work

就因为我没去上班

and answering my phone you think something bad happened

然后又不接电话你们就觉得我出事了吗

Maybe something good happened.

也可能是发生了好事啊

Did something good happen

那有好事发生了吗

Of course not

当然没有

Nothing good ever happens

好事从不发生在我身上

What

怎么

Nope just just... whoa.

没事就是感叹下

It smells pretty ripe in here.

里面一股恶臭味

You kind feel it in your eyes.

光是用眼睛都可以感觉到

Raj what's going on

拉杰发生什么事了

I was humiliated by yet another woman.

我又被一个女人羞辱了

You didn't kill her and chop her up

你没有杀死她然后碎尸吧

that's not what we're smelling right

屋里的味道不是尸臭对吧

No.

不是

I took her for coffee

我带她去喝咖啡

and she snuck out the bathroom window

结果她为了摆脱我

to get away from me.

从厕所的窗户溜走了

Oh you poor baby.

可怜的小宝贝

I went and looked.

我去看了

It was a high and tiny window.

那个窗户又高又小

She must have been very motivated.

她一定是想逃到了极点

I'm sorry. That's awful but come on.

我很遗憾那太伤人了但拜托

you got to shake it off.

你得放下这件事

Yeah you can't stay in your apartment

对啊你不能窝在公寓里

for the rest of your life.

就此度过余生吧

Why not

为什么不能

With online shopping and overnight delivery

有网上购物和隔天送达

I can get anything I want.

我要什么有什么

Look

瞧

I just ordered a case of Dinty Moore beef stew

我刚在亚马逊上订了一箱炖牛肉罐头

and two live lobsters on Amazon.

和两只活龙虾

Lobsters overnight

龙虾隔天就能送来

Oh you're kidding. Let me see.

开什么玩笑我看看

Well I'll be.

我也要

Look you can throw in a couple steaks

还能再订个牛排

and have a surf and turf.

配上一份海鲜牛排

The surf and turf sounds good.

海鲜牛排听起来不错

See if they corn on the cob.

看看有没有玉米棒

Guys

死阿宅们

We're trying to get him out of here

我们是来把他救出火坑

not you in.

而不是把你俩推进去

You're wasting your time.

你们这是在浪费时间

Just please leave me alone.

拜托不要管我啦

Now what

现在怎么办

I don't know.

我不知道

We could go to Red Lobster and talk about it.

我们可以去龙虾餐厅边吃边谈啊

We're all thinking it.

谁不对龙虾有兴趣

I just had the decency to wait for him to leave.

只不过我能礼貌地等他走了再谈

Hello Sheldon.

你好谢尔顿

Hello.

你好

How's the final stage of

"尼古丁成瘾"研究的

your nicotine addiction study going

最后阶段进行得怎么样了

Fine.

还行

Just hold on.

等下

Mommy's on the phone

老娘在打电话呢

Sorry.

抱歉

We've cut the monkeys down to one cigarette a day

我们把猴子的香烟削减到一天一根

so things are a little intense.

所以现在局面有点紧张

Makes me miss my marijuana abusing flatworms.

让我不禁怀念大麻上瘾的扁形虫

Those guys were mellow.

那些小家伙乖多了

Good news.

好消息

Uh the latest episode of Fun with Flags is online.

最新一集《有趣的旗帜》已经放到网上了

Oh that's right. How'd it go with Penny

好的跟佩妮合作得怎么样

Much better than I expected.

比我期望的好多了

She even gave me some helpful tips

她甚至给我一些关于表演

about acting and body language.

和肢体语言的有用建议

Watch.

看着

Welcome to my world.

欢迎来到我的世界

Not welcome to my world.

我的世界不欢迎你

Welcome.

欢迎

Not welcome.

不欢迎

Subtle but powerful.

意义隐晦但力道十足

I know.

我知道

I'm still learning to control it.

我还在学习如何控制力道

Did you tell Penny how helpful she was

那你有跟佩妮说她的建议很有用吗

Why would I do that

我为什么要说

Because she's your friend and she did a nice job.

因为她是你的朋友她帮了你大忙

I'm sure she'd like to hear it.

听到你这么说她肯定会开心

All right.

好吧

I didn't mean now. Hello

我不是说现在啊喂

Yeah yeah you want a cigarette.

是是你想要香烟

Well I'd like a normal boyfriend.

我还想要个正常的男朋友呢

Deal with it.

自己忍着吧

Oh hi. What's up

有事吗

You need me to shut the door

需要我把门关上

so you can do your knocking thing

好让你像平时那样敲门吗

No.

不用了

I didn't start yet it's fine. Okay.

-我还没开始所以没关系 -那就好

So what do you need

那你找我干嘛

Well I was thinking

我在想

about you helping me out last night...

你昨晚帮我的事

Penny.

佩妮

And I just wanted to tell you...

我是过来告诉你

Penny.

佩妮

...that the answer to the question

关于"谁的表现很棒"

"who did a great job " is you.

这个问题的答案是你

Penny.

佩妮

Really Yes.

-真的吗 -真的

You were very natural in front of the camera

你在镜头面前表现得很自然

and I found your suggestions extremely helpful.

而且我觉得你建议非常有用

Aw sweetie you just made my day.

亲爱的你让我今天真开心

Okay.

任务完成

Hey my acting class is putting on a play Friday night.

我的表演课在周五晚上有场演出

I could put you and Amy on the guest list.

我可以把你和艾米放进宾客名单哦

Oh that sounds terrible.

那听起来太无趣了

Why would I want to do that

我怎么可能想去啊

That's right.

没错

They're no good without the lighter.

没有打火机有烟也白搭

Well so much for your advice on complimenting Penny.

你这表扬佩妮的建议可"真好"

Why What happened

为什么怎么了

She tried to rope us into going

她想绑我们去

to her acting class to see a play.

她的表演课看个话剧

Don't worry.

别担心

Luckily I had the good sense

本人高瞻远瞩

to drown that kitten in the river.

早把这想法扼杀于摇篮之中了

Sheldon that's very rude.

谢尔顿你太失礼了

She helped you with your show.

她为你的节目出了力

The right thing to do is reciprocate

你应该好好报答她

by going to see her play.

去看她的话剧

Oh so many crazy rules.

规矩也太多了吧

That better be Tootsie Rolls you're throwing at me

你扔过来的最好是巧克力糖

Penny. Penny.

佩妮佩妮

Penny.

佩妮

Oh yeah much better.

感觉好多了

What

干嘛

Amy pointed out to me

艾米告诉我

that since you did something nice for me

你帮了我的忙

I'm obligated to do something nice for you.

所以我也应该礼尚往来

So...

所以

yes I'll go to your dopey play.

好我会去看你的傻帽话剧

Hey I don't want you to go anymore.

可我已经不想让你去了

Why not

为什么

You should go 'cause you want to go

你如果愿意的话可以去

not because you have to.

但若是被强迫就算了

Oh Dear Lord more rules Where does it stop

老天爷啊更多规矩何时才能是尽头啊

Can I want to go

我能不能想去

because I have to want to go

是因为我必须想去

Okay. Do whatever you want.

行你想怎样就怎样

Yeah but now wait.

不行等等

Do whatever I want...

我想怎样就怎样

or whatever I have to want

还是我必须想怎样就怎样

Oh for God's sake just come to the play.

我的天你来看话剧就是了

All right.

好吧

I don't want to but at least that makes sense.

我不想去不过这决定挺有道理的

You know I haven't seen Raj in several days.

我好几天没见过拉杰了

Is he no longer a part of our social group

他还是我们的小团体中的一员吗

And if so should we be interviewing for a replacement

如果不是的话我们要开始面试替补人员吗

Perhaps this time we go Latin.

或许这次我们该找个拉丁人

He's just decided he's never leaving his apartment again.

他决定再也不踏出自己的公寓了

Oh brilliant.

真棒

I've been itching to pull that trigger.

我一直想这么做来着

He's upset because he can't get anywhere with women.

他很伤心因为总交不到女朋友

Would it help if I gave him some pointers

要不要我去给他点建议

I'm just funnin' ya.

我逗你们玩呢

Hi.

你好

I don't know if you remember me

不知道你还记不记得我

but I was here the other night at your party.

那天晚上我来参加过你的聚会来着

Oh yeah you left with Raj.

对你和拉杰一起走的

Uh yeah.

是的

You're the one

就是你吗

Okay let me tell you something.

我告诉你

That guy you blew off

你甩掉的那个人

happens to be my best friend.

是我最好的朋友

Okay He was devastated.

他被伤透了心

Sorry.

对不起

Can you just give him this

你能把这个给他吗

Okay.

好

But I gotta warn you

但我得警告你

Raj is a proud passionate man.

拉杰是个骄傲情感激烈的人

If you go running out on him again

如果你再撇下他偷跑掉

you're only gonna get like

你离成为过去式

three or four more chances before you are history.

就剩三到四次机会了

Come on she came back.

别这样嘛她回来了

This is good news.

这是好消息

You should celebrate.

你应该好好庆祝才对

I don't want to celebrate.

我不想庆祝

Not even a little

一点也不吗

I mean... we could have a pants party.

我们可以办个裤子派对啊

Go put some on.

快去找条穿上

Why would I want her number

我要她的电话号码做什么

I don't want anything to do with this woman.

我不想和这女人再有任何瓜葛

Oh come on Raj... No you don't get it.

-拜托拉杰 -你不明白

I want nothing to do with any woman.

我再也不想和任何女人有瓜葛了

My heart is stone.

我心已死

From now on I'm a monk.

从现在起我要当个和尚

I renounce all worldly pleasures.

我要拒绝尘世一切享受

Except for lobster.

除了龙虾

And garlic butter.

还有蒜蓉酱

Boy I want to tell you it's her loss

我本来想告诉你这是她的损失

but you are not making it easy.

但你还真是让我说不出口啊

You're you're a good friend for trying to help but...

你真是个好朋友这么帮我但...

I've made my choice.

我意已决

All right.

好吧

Well I'll see you around. See you.

-那回头见 -回见

Oh wait take her number.

等等把她的号码拿走

I don't want the temptation.

别留下诱惑

Okay.

好

I must be strong so I don't stray from my true purpose

我必须坚强起来坚持自己的奋斗目标

the study of the universe.

宇宙研究

All right.

好吧

Thanks for ruining lobster for me.

谢谢你让我再也不想吃龙虾了

Wait

等等

Give me the number

把号码给我

Give me the number

把号码给我

Give me the number

把号码给我

So Amy what's going on with your addiction study

艾米你的上瘾研究怎么样了

Sadly I'm no longer associated with that project.

很遗憾我已经被项目团队踢出来了

Why What happened

为什么出什么事了

Typical bureaucratic nonsense.

典型的狗屁官僚主义

You can get animals addicted to a harmful substance

你可以让动物对有害物质上瘾

you can dissect their brains

可以解剖它们的大脑

but you throw their own feces back at them

但你向它们扔它们自己的排泄物

and suddenly you're "unprofessional."

就突然之间"不专业"了

I'm sorry...

真是抱歉

...that I asked.

我真多嘴...

All right let's get this stupid play over with.

好啦白痴话剧早看早完

Uh hang on.

等等

Empty your pockets.

掏空你的口袋

Why

为什么

You know why.

你知道原因

The Nintendo DS.

任天堂游戏机

And the PSP.

索尼游戏机

Now the Gameboy.

还有一台呢

Aw for Pete's sake.

让不让人活了

Can we go now

现在可以走了吗

Well is that all of it

全部交出来了吗

Just set it down.

放下就好

Just so you know this is not a stupid play.

告诉你这可不是白痴话剧

A Streetcar Named Desire is an American classic.

《欲望号街车》是美国经典

It's about streetcars

原来是讲地面电车啊

Oh great. I won't need this.

太好了那这个也不要了

Just a sec.

等下

Oh who says "just a sec"

谁会说"等下"啊

I hate myself

我恨我自己

Hello.

你好

Hi.

你好

Uh would you like to come in

要进来吗

Oh no I can't stay.

不用了我马上就走

I just wanted to say...

我只是想说

I'm sorry for running out of the coffee shop.

抱歉我从咖啡店逃走了

That wasn't cool.

那样做太不像话了

So uh...

所以

Yeah.

是的

I'm sorry.

对不起

Wait.

等等

Can you at least tell me what went wrong

至少能告诉我哪里出错了吗

It's okay. I can take anything.

没事的什么原因我都能接受

Unless it's something I did

除非是说我做的事

or said or am.

说的话或是我这人怎样

'Cause those are like my buttons.

这些原因会让我发火的

No it's not any of that.

不是这些原因

It's just...

只是

I kind of have a hard time

我在陌生人周围

around people I don't know.

会感觉非常不自在

Really

真的吗

Then what were you doing

那你那晚

at the comic book store that night

为什么会去漫画店

I've been trying to force myself into situations

我在尝试强迫自己

that I'm not comfortable with.

面对我不喜欢的环境

I saw the flyer in the store window

我在商店橱窗上看到宣传单

and I made myself go in.

我强迫自己去的

I don't even like comic books.

我压根连个漫画粉都不是

Yeah me neither.

我也不喜欢

Then what were you doing there

那你为什么要去

I lied. I love them.

我说谎了我爱漫画书

I only said that so you'd go out with me.

我这样说只是希望你愿意和我约会

Oh you don't want to do that.

你还是不要和我约会为妙

I'm kind of broken.

我不能算是个正常人

That's great.

太好了

I'm broken too.

我也不正常

Oh no you're not.

你不是的

Oh I totally am.

我相当不正常

If it wasn't for this beer

如果不是因为这瓶啤酒

I couldn't even talk to you right now.

我现在都没办法和你讲话

I'm a wreck.

我完全就是一残疾货

There are many things seriously wrong with me.

我有很多非常严重的毛病

And not quirks either.

而且不是指怪癖哦

Like... diagnosable psychological problems.

准确来说是可诊断的心理问题

Maybe brain damage.

有可能是脑子坏了

Well how do I know you're not just saying that

我怎么知道你不是随便说说的

Go out with me on one date

和我约会一次

and I promise you you'll see.

我向你保证你会看见满是毛病的我

Okay.

好的

Text me.

发短信给我

Bye.

拜

You won't regret it.

你不会后悔的

I'm the most pathetic guy you've ever met.

我是你这辈子所碰到最悲催的男人

And that boys and girls...

就这样孩子们

is how it's done.

泡妞就是这样的

You love her very much don't you

你非常爱她对吗

Yes.

是的

I think you have a great capacity for devotion.

我觉得你是个非常有奉献精神的人

You'll be lonely when she passes on won't you

她去世后你会孤单对吗

I understand what that is.

我明白这种感觉

To be lonely

孤单的感觉吗

She's pretty good huh

她很不错啊

She is.

的确

But when do they get to the part about streetcars

什么时候才能演到有轨电车啊

...when I was a very young girl.

在我很小的时候

When I was 16 years old I made the discovery...

我16岁时发现了

love.

爱情

All at once

一下子

and much much too completely.

一切来得太突然了

It was like you suddenly turned a blinding light

就好像你突然将明亮的灯光

on something that had always been half a shadow.

照到总是一半处于黑暗中的东西一样

That's how it struck the world for me.

于是我的生活发生了天翻地覆的变化

But I was unlucky.

但我是不幸的

Deluded.

被欺骗了

She's remarkable.

她的表演太精彩了

She really is.

的确

Our Penny's a star.

咱们的佩妮是大明星

How can she remember all those lines

她怎么能记住那么多台词

but as a waitress she can't remember

但作为服务员却不记得

"no tomato" on my hamburger

我的汉堡是不要加番茄的

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